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- a member for 14 years, 7 months and 9 days
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- has posted 4 stories and 22 replies on question of the week
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» Schadenfreude
Kick like a horse
wehttam"snow"man just reminded me of a story...
When I was a wee young Leftovercrack (about 12or13) i was in the local park playing football with a couple of mates I belive there where 3 of us, Graham, Martyn and me. My friend Graham was goalies (playing the ole "two n in"). Now this park was an amaing place the goal was basically a metal frame, two uprights and a crossbar.
Back to the story, I shot from about 15yds or so out, hard as I could for a 12/13 yr old and the hard leather ball slammed the crossbar and into a hedge. Now, while Graham turned around to see where the ball had gone the crappy goalframe which wasnt very sturdy in the first place had started to fall forward, Martyn shouts "Graham! Watch out for the...." Graham lloks up and the crossbar cracks him on top of the head, and he crumples like a paper cup. I at this point an knelt on the floor with tears streaming down my face with laughter whilst Martyn is flapping around screaming "Oh my god! Grahams dead, grahams dead!". Graham is laying on the floor out cold, I have to contain myself and run to the nearest house to phone for an ambulance (before mobile phones were "in"). Ambulance comes, Grahm has mild concussion so all was well.
What made this even funnier is that his dad picked us up from the park and he had to pull over by the side of the road because when I filled him in on why Graham had a lump the size of a tennis ball on his head, he burst out laughing, for a good 5 solid minutes. Grahams mum? Not so pleased.
Maybe you had to be there to find it funny, but at the time it was fucking hilarious. Also, I saw Graham a few weeks ago, he is now married, I told this story to him and his wife, he had "forgotten", and she laughed hysterically in the middle of town.
Length? About the size of a tennis ball.
(Thu 17th Dec 2009, 15:18, More)
Kick like a horse
wehttam"snow"man just reminded me of a story...
When I was a wee young Leftovercrack (about 12or13) i was in the local park playing football with a couple of mates I belive there where 3 of us, Graham, Martyn and me. My friend Graham was goalies (playing the ole "two n in"). Now this park was an amaing place the goal was basically a metal frame, two uprights and a crossbar.
Back to the story, I shot from about 15yds or so out, hard as I could for a 12/13 yr old and the hard leather ball slammed the crossbar and into a hedge. Now, while Graham turned around to see where the ball had gone the crappy goalframe which wasnt very sturdy in the first place had started to fall forward, Martyn shouts "Graham! Watch out for the...." Graham lloks up and the crossbar cracks him on top of the head, and he crumples like a paper cup. I at this point an knelt on the floor with tears streaming down my face with laughter whilst Martyn is flapping around screaming "Oh my god! Grahams dead, grahams dead!". Graham is laying on the floor out cold, I have to contain myself and run to the nearest house to phone for an ambulance (before mobile phones were "in"). Ambulance comes, Grahm has mild concussion so all was well.
What made this even funnier is that his dad picked us up from the park and he had to pull over by the side of the road because when I filled him in on why Graham had a lump the size of a tennis ball on his head, he burst out laughing, for a good 5 solid minutes. Grahams mum? Not so pleased.
Maybe you had to be there to find it funny, but at the time it was fucking hilarious. Also, I saw Graham a few weeks ago, he is now married, I told this story to him and his wife, he had "forgotten", and she laughed hysterically in the middle of town.
Length? About the size of a tennis ball.
(Thu 17th Dec 2009, 15:18, More)
» Teenage Crushes - Part Two
Fatality!!!
Sorry for the doubling up...
My other crush was in the Mortal Kombat movie, Bridgette Wilson, she was Sonya Blade. She was also in Billy Maddison and I Know What You Did Last Summer. She is also, mucho-lovely.
(Tue 10th Nov 2009, 16:57, More)
Fatality!!!
Sorry for the doubling up...
My other crush was in the Mortal Kombat movie, Bridgette Wilson, she was Sonya Blade. She was also in Billy Maddison and I Know What You Did Last Summer. She is also, mucho-lovely.
(Tue 10th Nov 2009, 16:57, More)
» Teenage Crushes - Part Two
Ralph you lucky cnut...
POP! Yup, this is my first post...
Elizabeth Shue in the Karate Kid movie. I was about 8 or 9 and was 100% sure that if I became a black belt she would love me.
It didn't work....fucksocks
edit: OK, so I wasn't a teenager, am 27 now and still have a thing for her so get lost....
(Tue 10th Nov 2009, 16:44, More)
Ralph you lucky cnut...
POP! Yup, this is my first post...
Elizabeth Shue in the Karate Kid movie. I was about 8 or 9 and was 100% sure that if I became a black belt she would love me.
It didn't work....fucksocks
edit: OK, so I wasn't a teenager, am 27 now and still have a thing for her so get lost....
(Tue 10th Nov 2009, 16:44, More)