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- a member for 3 years, 5 months and 2 days
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» Prejudice
Their, there, they're i go again
I'm no genius in the world of grammar,but am i the only one who gets pissed off at the constant use of the wrong version of "there" being used on forums, blogs etc.
There are three different versions for a reason.
I just wish the lazy fuckwits would learn how to use them. cunts.
(Fri 2nd Apr 2010, 18:42, More)
Their, there, they're i go again
I'm no genius in the world of grammar,but am i the only one who gets pissed off at the constant use of the wrong version of "there" being used on forums, blogs etc.
There are three different versions for a reason.
I just wish the lazy fuckwits would learn how to use them. cunts.
(Fri 2nd Apr 2010, 18:42, More)
» Devastating Put-Downs
The mastery of timing and a quick mind
The genius who came out with the following retort will go down in my memory for ever and ever.
It was a quiet saturday lunchtime in my local boozer about 10 years ago.
our landlord was a genuine good laugh who could handle the piss takes as well as dish them out. Thing was, he had a slight disadvantage in that he weighed the best part of 30 stone. Anyways up, our small group of about 5 of us are stood at the bar talking footy etc when in walks a complete stranger. You know how it is when that happens in a local, the place falls silent ( see slaughtered lamb in american warewolf). The said stranger is wearing the loudest knitted jumper you have ever seen and our landlord seeing a gilt edged opportunity jumps in head first
" Hello mate , i like your jumper" ( looks at us for approval).
Stranger , without hesitation replies.
" You probably would, it's a medium"
Cue 5 human beer fountains.
(Sun 27th Nov 2011, 22:02, More)
The mastery of timing and a quick mind
The genius who came out with the following retort will go down in my memory for ever and ever.
It was a quiet saturday lunchtime in my local boozer about 10 years ago.
our landlord was a genuine good laugh who could handle the piss takes as well as dish them out. Thing was, he had a slight disadvantage in that he weighed the best part of 30 stone. Anyways up, our small group of about 5 of us are stood at the bar talking footy etc when in walks a complete stranger. You know how it is when that happens in a local, the place falls silent ( see slaughtered lamb in american warewolf). The said stranger is wearing the loudest knitted jumper you have ever seen and our landlord seeing a gilt edged opportunity jumps in head first
" Hello mate , i like your jumper" ( looks at us for approval).
Stranger , without hesitation replies.
" You probably would, it's a medium"
Cue 5 human beer fountains.
(Sun 27th Nov 2011, 22:02, More)
» Amazing displays of ignorance
One day in burger king
I was waiting for my whopper meal to arrive when a couple walked in who were, shall we say, not the brightest of specimens to grace this planet.The girl decided to be the ambassador of the couple. The conversation went as follows.
Girl." what do you want gary"
Garry. " burger or summatt"
Girl. " Do you do burgers?"
Assistant. " Yes" points at vast range available on signs behind counter
Mumbled conversation ensues between couple for next two minutes
Girl. " do you do fries?"
Assistant. "YES"
Another mumbled conversation follows. A good four minutes have now passed since they entered
Girl. " How long will it take for burger and fries?"
Assistant. " three minutes at the most"
Girl " Forget it, we aint got that long"
What a waste of organs!
(Thu 18th Mar 2010, 17:55, More)
One day in burger king
I was waiting for my whopper meal to arrive when a couple walked in who were, shall we say, not the brightest of specimens to grace this planet.The girl decided to be the ambassador of the couple. The conversation went as follows.
Girl." what do you want gary"
Garry. " burger or summatt"
Girl. " Do you do burgers?"
Assistant. " Yes" points at vast range available on signs behind counter
Mumbled conversation ensues between couple for next two minutes
Girl. " do you do fries?"
Assistant. "YES"
Another mumbled conversation follows. A good four minutes have now passed since they entered
Girl. " How long will it take for burger and fries?"
Assistant. " three minutes at the most"
Girl " Forget it, we aint got that long"
What a waste of organs!
(Thu 18th Mar 2010, 17:55, More)
» Annoying words and phrases
Savaners
that say berminum when it's Birmingham.
Clowns.
(Fri 9th Apr 2010, 0:03, More)
Savaners
that say berminum when it's Birmingham.
Clowns.
(Fri 9th Apr 2010, 0:03, More)
» Vandalism
Maybe one or two of you have seen it
Near the town of rugby in blighty there is a disused railway bridge on which has been written, removed and rewritten countless times " HOME RULE FOR CRICK" Crick being a small village about 7 miles away across the other side of town.It can't be missed by anyone coming into rugby along this road. I'm only 41 and i can remember it being there for my entire life. Anyone better that?
(Sun 10th Oct 2010, 22:16, More)
Maybe one or two of you have seen it
Near the town of rugby in blighty there is a disused railway bridge on which has been written, removed and rewritten countless times " HOME RULE FOR CRICK" Crick being a small village about 7 miles away across the other side of town.It can't be missed by anyone coming into rugby along this road. I'm only 41 and i can remember it being there for my entire life. Anyone better that?
(Sun 10th Oct 2010, 22:16, More)