Profile for BeefJerky:
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- a member for 13 years, 4 months and 21 days
- has posted 2 messages on the main board
- has posted 0 messages on the talk board
- has posted 4 messages on the links board
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- has posted 5 stories and 3 replies on question of the week
- They liked 1 pictures, 0 links, 0 talk posts, and 2 qotw answers.
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» I didn't do it
I was not responsible for my classmates broken ankle.
I did not find a spoon in a tree whilst at primary school, then use said spoon to dig a mini, foot sized pit, cover it with twigs, leaves, and grass then wait for an unsuspecting victim to fall into my cunningly laid trap. The person that eventually fell into my punji spiked pit did not fall awkwardly, twist with his foot wedged firmly in the hole, and break his ankle. I also most assuredly did not own up to digging said pit.
(Thu 22nd Sep 2011, 8:34, More)
I was not responsible for my classmates broken ankle.
I did not find a spoon in a tree whilst at primary school, then use said spoon to dig a mini, foot sized pit, cover it with twigs, leaves, and grass then wait for an unsuspecting victim to fall into my cunningly laid trap. The person that eventually fell into my punji spiked pit did not fall awkwardly, twist with his foot wedged firmly in the hole, and break his ankle. I also most assuredly did not own up to digging said pit.
(Thu 22nd Sep 2011, 8:34, More)
» School Naughtiness
My other half and her friends wore g-strings under their school dresses..
lined up against a window, lifted their skirts, and did their best impressions (ha!) of pressed ham under glass.
Apparently, that pretty much ended her time at THAT school
(Sun 11th Sep 2011, 0:54, More)
My other half and her friends wore g-strings under their school dresses..
lined up against a window, lifted their skirts, and did their best impressions (ha!) of pressed ham under glass.
Apparently, that pretty much ended her time at THAT school
(Sun 11th Sep 2011, 0:54, More)
» School Naughtiness
I once wee'd at school..
Into an empty beer bottle.
And then handed said partially filled beer bottle to friends who added their own special brew into the bottle. Topped it up with water, gave it a good shaking to produce a beautiful, creamy, foamy head, and gave the bottle to my schoolyard nemesis who took a good long pull, thinking that since it was a beer bottle, had a foamy head, it MUST have been beer.
Oh how mistaken he was.
Having parents called to the school was such a small price to pay for sweet, sweet revenge.
(Sun 11th Sep 2011, 0:52, More)
I once wee'd at school..
Into an empty beer bottle.
And then handed said partially filled beer bottle to friends who added their own special brew into the bottle. Topped it up with water, gave it a good shaking to produce a beautiful, creamy, foamy head, and gave the bottle to my schoolyard nemesis who took a good long pull, thinking that since it was a beer bottle, had a foamy head, it MUST have been beer.
Oh how mistaken he was.
Having parents called to the school was such a small price to pay for sweet, sweet revenge.
(Sun 11th Sep 2011, 0:52, More)
» I Hurt My Rude Bits, Again
A mate of mine stapled his nutsack to a fence post..
Not staple as in small pointy bit of bent wire that has trouble penetrating (ha.. Penetrate) 3 sheets of paper, but staple as in, well, fencing staple-a fucking big U shaped galvanised nail, sharpened on both ends, driven by a big pneumatic nailgun type apparatus that fastens wire to wooden posts. It took a claw hammer, much shrieking, and even more pain to un-fasten his skin sack from the fence post. Luckily, if it can be described as such, the staple went through the wrinkle bag itself but didn't pierce the plums within. Strangely enough, not long after this, he went and started training as a priest.
(Thu 14th Mar 2013, 6:38, More)
A mate of mine stapled his nutsack to a fence post..
Not staple as in small pointy bit of bent wire that has trouble penetrating (ha.. Penetrate) 3 sheets of paper, but staple as in, well, fencing staple-a fucking big U shaped galvanised nail, sharpened on both ends, driven by a big pneumatic nailgun type apparatus that fastens wire to wooden posts. It took a claw hammer, much shrieking, and even more pain to un-fasten his skin sack from the fence post. Luckily, if it can be described as such, the staple went through the wrinkle bag itself but didn't pierce the plums within. Strangely enough, not long after this, he went and started training as a priest.
(Thu 14th Mar 2013, 6:38, More)
» B3TA fixes the world
Corporate Speak.
Especially the word 'incentivi(z/s)ed'...WTF??
(Fri 23rd Sep 2011, 4:11, More)
Corporate Speak.
Especially the word 'incentivi(z/s)ed'...WTF??
(Fri 23rd Sep 2011, 4:11, More)