b3ta.com user nikg33
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I was a serial lurker who has now dipped her tentative toe into the posting pool. As a raging, all round glamourpuss and sexual predator, I have an insatiable hankering for heavy drinking and Honda Accord drivers.

I can be regularly spotted spreading my hot love all over the mighty city of Coventry. You will never find a more wretched hive of scum and villainy…

Also, for a while I thought that I made the Mock Turtle moist…Unfortunately it turns out everyone does. I was quite disappointed to discover that :(

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» Terrified!

I was Terrified
This is my first post and I have Captain Placid and Pooflake as my friends so I think I’m pretty brave for writing anything at all to be honest- be gentle with me...

The most terrifying thing happened to me about 20 years ago when living the life of a surf dudette - in fact actually generally bumming around, not doing a lot.

I was living in France and working for various holiday companies, teaching surfing, what a great life, at the start and end of the season we had to set up campsites and take them down again- Montage and Demontage… a great life working in the sun all day drinking beer, partying all night, more beer, Pol Remy (50p a bottle sparkling wine) and the occasional recreational MASSIVE drugs...

At the end of this particular year I was the area manager; god knows how I got that job. Any hoo it was the demontage of our last campsite all the teams had got together for a grand finale clean up but most importantly ‘End of season Party’

I had despatched some of the lads in the van to get alcohol for the pending party whilst I was working with a Scottish girl ‘Nikki’ who was well known for being a raging alcoholic, she would be pissed no matter what time of day or night but she worked hard... it was 90 degrees and we were working inside tents, otherwise known as saunas! the only answer was to drink ice cold kronenbourg to replace what we were sweating out.. It was at this point it happened. We were both on our hands and knees un pegging the bedroom areas of the tent when we saw it.

As we lifted the canvas there it was half poking out from underneath a big black slithering snake with shining eyes looking right up at us, I don’t know who was more scared us or it….

Nikki screamed which made me scream, which in turn caused us to scream some more, our hearts almost burst out of our bodies at the though of being attacked by the ‘Snake’ we grabbed hold of each other and screamed some more whilst falling over each other trying to make our escape, I was so terrified that I actually wet myself in my haste to escape.

As we fell through the tent door the lads in the van arrived back, seeing the look of terror on our faces they obviously came hurrying to our rescue, barely able to speak we told them what had occurred, Paul a big burly rugby playing lad offered to go and take a look…..

…..imagine how terrified we were when he came out of the tent holding our snake, which was in fact a girl’s head band with sparkly bits on…..

Terrified yes more than once that day, I had to host the end of season party knowing everyone knew I had wet myself over a terrifying ‘Head band’
(Wed 11th Apr 2012, 9:21, More)