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Profile for eight:
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I am a number, I am not a free man!

Some OLD posts:

I see this every race...

CFB
and clearer (100k)
edit: the original for those of you who may RIS

Sorry, had to do it...

Click image for bigger (270k)

BBC iPlayer Rocks...

CFB and more detail: WARNING[233kb]
edit: apologies to people outside the UK who won't have seen iPlayer or don't get the reference

Is it too late?

Sorry!

Recent front page messages:

Ouch!


Click on image for slightly bigger.
(Sun 1st Jun 2003, 17:54, More)

Best answers to questions:

» Scary Neighbours

Scary? Odd? Mental? Yes!!!! [long]
I live at the end of a road, with mental neighbores.

I won't tell you about the wife swapping that goes on between all the houses, or the street fights, druggies or knife weilding brats with chav clothing and cars that appear to be nothing more than mobile beat boxes.. oh no, I'll tell you about the nice ones that live in houses attached to mine..

On one side, there's a couple who fight regularly (every night), he shout, she shouts, they throw and smash stuff against the interveining wall, then they start crying, go into their back garden for a ciggy, start shouting again, get told to shut the feck up by the Police(they are nextdoor but one), so they go inside and start having sex.. she's a screamer!!! Porky's Lassie has nothing on this girl! All of this happens between midnight, when they get back from the pub, and somewhere around 4am.. I'm usually more tired than them the next day! (lack of sleep you understand)

On the other side there is a family with three kids, they regulalry have orgies (not the kids) which means that I regulary have to fight for a parking space outside my garage (if I park in it I can't get out until they've done the money shots, sobered up, mopped up and left) and then there's used condoms thrown into my garden, loud music (cheesey pr0n flick stuff), screaming, laughing, moaning etc.. worse still, the bastards never invite me!!!

Photo's available on request.
(Fri 26th Aug 2005, 14:05, More)

» Office Christmas Parties

Merry Christmas? In your own time! Oh, and cut out the "merry"!
We don't get bonuses at any time of the year and the boss doesn't pay for parties...

Last year after we (the employees) organised a Christmas party at a local restaurant, the boss (who invited himself along) decided to cheer everyone up by ordering lots of bottles of wine along with the meal, which everyone enjoyed to the fullest, until he went home, so we had to pay for his generosity (and his meal).

This year the manglement decided to organise the party, so we've been invited to a local hotel chain for lunch, where (apart from paying for our own transport) we have to pay 50 each to have a two course meal with a free half carafe of wine (we checked! It's a short carafe meaning you almost get a full glass of wine)! However, in entering in the spirit of Christmas, management have told us we have to go back to work afterwards unless we actually drink the wine, in which case we have to use our holidays to book the afternoon off since we can't officially return to work after drinking.

In addition to this magnanimous offer, they also have decided to give us the whole of Christmas week off work, though it does mean our annual holidays have been reduced by three days to cover the three days in the middle (if you don't have 3 left from this year, don't worry, they will take it from your next year's allowance).

Oh and did I mention we've been told that we'll all be on call over the holidays, at no extra expense to themselves?!
(i.e. no extra pay and we have to be within 30 mins of the company... and sober!)

Merry Christmas?? Bah!! Humbuggered more like!!!!
(Tue 21st Dec 2004, 16:56, More)