i find the suggestion that victims "choose" to be victims as was suggested below (Pig_of_Doom,) utterly fucking reprehensible...

my father bullied me all my young life - a sad small alcoholic loser, a tyrant, a figure of sheer terror to me as a small child.

i now have a great career and a wife and child that love me - but...

i was told aged 5 i was "all the man i was ever going to be" whilst having my hand crushed to a pulp as a supposedly 'manly' way to say goodnight. I WANTED A FUCKING HUG FOR FUCKSAKE.

i saw my home smashed up and my mother cowering in a corner at 3 am with mascara streaked eyes that were dry and sore from hours of crying, every other fucking weekend

every christmas ruined.

blood on the walls.

smashed televisions and glass from broken coffee tables littered everywhere on a saturday morning

stabbings.

burning newspaper being held up to my mothers face whilst pinned to a wall.

my mother being threatened with an air rifle in her face.

lying awake till 3 am hearing my 'father' call my mother all the whores and cunts he could muster (i found out that way quite early in life my mother lost her virginity on a train aged 18 -sadly she was spectacularly fertile so i was the accident that smashed them together) apparently that made her "a fucking hingoot"

other joys? regularly being dragged out of bed at 4 am on a school night at primary school age with my even younger sister "because we were leaving" sadly this never happened

bullies?

fuck off, you punched a child in a playground, you have no fucking clue

this whole QOTW is about "i hit a big boy when i was 8" VIZ: i won!

thats fine, dont tell me i chose to be a fucking victim
( spimf ™ is whoever you want him to be, Thu 14 May 2009, 21:37, 22 replies)

I agree with you
I certainly didn't decide one day to be a victim. I just happened to have the characteristics that people decided I would be theirs.

Fair play to you from taking your upbringing and turning it in to something good.
(Potty Jag har smör i min rumpspringa, Thu 14 May 2009, 21:51, closed)

i'm sorry, but the mac thing...
...we can never be lovers

PC = plastic crap

(thanks for your comments though)

'written on my 17" MacBook Pro'
( spimf ™ is whoever you want him to be, Thu 14 May 2009, 22:03, closed)

Ahhh
My hatred for macs is more so I can spar with the die hard Apple fanboys who worship Jobs et al. It's a decent enough set of hardware and sortware, even though it fustrates the hell out of me.
(Potty Jag har smör i min rumpspringa, Thu 14 May 2009, 22:07, closed)

im a designer
to be honest its the industry tool for us industry tools

see what i did there

(they are purdy thought aint they)
( spimf ™ is whoever you want him to be, Thu 14 May 2009, 22:10, closed)

They do look nice
Although my very heavily customised desktop looks nicer, just because I made it.

I will disagree with you about it being an industry tool - I work in a printer/designers and we only have one mac. Mostly PC's here - all the software works on both types of machine, so we find it easier to just support the PC's.
(Potty Jag har smör i min rumpspringa, Thu 14 May 2009, 22:19, closed)

if you work in print where stuff is actually ripped - yeah
but you will appreciate all the files sent for print are on CS4 from macs

i have worked on PC's - i will concede photoshop is fairly familiar but beyond that... nah i'm sorry i need a mac
( spimf ™ is whoever you want him to be, Thu 14 May 2009, 22:26, closed)

We do indeed get a few files made in CS4 from macs
I can tell every single time - they never have a file extension on them. My £5 idiot tax for not putting it on didn't go down well. Without the extension I couldn't tell what it was made in.

But we also design from scratch in house for people, and exclusivly use PC's. While they rip it as part of the process, they still need to go through all the design work. With the speed of current technology, I don't really think there is any difference between the OS's any more except for the difference in interface. I know I'm greatly simplifying it, but I honestly can't see that much of a difference when it comes to it any more.
(Potty Jag har smör i min rumpspringa, Thu 14 May 2009, 22:43, closed)

macs dont need file extensions to work out what they are looking at
they're CLEVER

so do you have the full CS4 suite for the plastic crap boxes. i cant see why a code jockey would need indesign or illustrator

surely photoshop is the tool to comp natalie portman into a hardcore setting
( spimf ™ is whoever you want him to be, Thu 14 May 2009, 22:49, closed)

File extensions rock
They just make my life easier for getting different programs to open the same document and for finding specific things via filtering.

I'm not 100% sure what the machines have on them. I'm pretty sure it's full CS4. I'm more involved in the admin and making bits of paper come out of the printers side. Designer give me file, I make book!
(Potty Jag har smör i min rumpspringa, Thu 14 May 2009, 22:58, closed)

to be fair most macs default to applying a file extension
we all (designers) even know what most of them pertain to, in fact you have to delete the file extension while saving if you want to not have one - which is an option but the mac will still know what it is.

pc's make you work too hard - who gives a fuck about root files

sorry i hate the fuckers, they cost half as much but do everything half as good - at least in my line of work anyway.

but i still love you
( spimf ™ is whoever you want him to be, Thu 14 May 2009, 23:14, closed)

Yup
You win, spimf. That's a hellish tale. Glad you survived to be what you are now.

And I'm using a MacBook Pro too! Don't want to be your lover, mind you.
( K2k6 has a proper job these days, Thu 14 May 2009, 22:08, closed)

Whatever I say in reply will only seem inappropriate
However, you earned your click, sir.
(Bicycle Repairman "you're also a bit of a wanker", Thu 14 May 2009, 22:03, closed)

no worries pj
sorry for the rant

and cheers for the click
( spimf ™ is whoever you want him to be, Thu 14 May 2009, 22:08, closed)

I've been there too
It surely isn't pleasant at all. I'm not clicking. I don't like it. Chin up son and just remember that you aren't going to turn out like that.
(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Thu 14 May 2009, 22:15, closed)

Bloody hell
clicks

on my Mac
(insomniac-surfer oh go on then, just this once, Thu 14 May 2009, 22:59, closed)

YAY!
I have a MAC!

I run XP on it. Only way I can make the thing useful.

Cheers
( Legless Mister Stabby - shanks for the memory, Fri 15 May 2009, 3:45, closed)

My thoughts exactly!
I have copies of XP waiting for my dad and my sister when they finally give up the struggle.
(Potty Jag har smör i min rumpspringa, Fri 15 May 2009, 8:20, closed)

@Spimf
I think what you have achieved considering your upbringing is incredible and you should be very proud however..........


I've noticed you still, (quite rightly), harbour a lot of anger inside you.



Try and let it go if you can.
( girlinthehole, Fri 15 May 2009, 10:45, closed)

my wife tells me this also
and i know it is true

but it is VERY VERY hard to do

the problem is i want to kill him, but then i would be killing may father, but yet he never was a father. its fucked up.

and hes no where near as charismatic as darth

its difficult
( spimf ™ is whoever you want him to be, Fri 15 May 2009, 20:40, closed)

Good on you Spimf

Mrs G had an abusive up-bringing to rival yours and has similarly built a life for herself as a decent human being despite the best efforts of her scum-bag father.

Clicks to you mate.
(Che Grimsdale Best before:, Fri 15 May 2009, 14:10, closed)

point
Good point. I thought about replying to this QOTW, having been bullied at school, but honestly couldn't think of anything memorable which would have raised a laugh, let alone a tear in the eye (my major nemesis, VN, is apparently now a chartered accountant, so there is some divine retribution...) Yes, I was hit, spat on, taunted, called names, but so what? At the end of the day, I certainly didn't have to go through the crap you did, for which I am eternally grateful.

Keep well, and hope that you get out of the Middle East, and back into some sanity, which you obviously merit.
(groover j lazerus, Sun 17 May 2009, 22:12, closed)

I agree with this completely
No one chooses to be a victim, I certainly didn't choose to have an abusive father and neither did you.

I like this isn't appropriate but I'm clicking
(panda_sam, Tue 19 May 2009, 16:54, closed)