my sweary friend
back in the day i worked at OneTel (now carphone warehouse) on the phone as a CSR. (customer service rep)

i have to say that it's the SYSTEM imposed by morons + human nature that makes customer service so utterly shit, not just the gormless plebs answering the phones. ie, it basically boils down to:

if you ram products down the throats of customers instead of addressing their problems. you get paid more.

if you fob customers off and get onto the next call asap all day, you get paid more.

we actually practiced lying as part of the training.
the whole thing was rotten starting of course with the overpaid clueless coked up morons running the whole mess.

but this is all beside the point.

the point being:

I had a very funny and charismatic friend in our 'team'
he was a Kiwi.

and he used to answer the phone like this:

"Fucking take your phone number on you're a cunt!"

but with skilful use of his NewZealand twang, the customer heard this:

"If I can take the phone number on your account"

brilliant
(L E T S G O "Stop buying into and spreading this shit", Wed 9 Sep 2009, 18:49, 3 replies)

that is...
'If I can' brilliant!
(powervator and NONE SHALL PASS, Wed 9 Sep 2009, 20:06, closed)

*click*
For getting me to put on a kiwi accent...I'll be doing this all day now...
( snee held his breath since, Thu 10 Sep 2009, 8:15, closed)

Clap clap clap !!!
Bleedin' EXCELLENT !!! Clap clap clap !!!
( SpankyHanky, Thu 10 Sep 2009, 9:12, closed)