the shame of gay porno
A few years back in the days of 56K modems and Nokia banana phones, me and the girlfriend were invited to our friends place for pancakes and fun and some booze, for t ‘was the very eve of Shrove Tuesday.

We arrived at our friends flat only to find that they had overlooked the all important lemon part of the pancake equation. It was decided that my friend Jamie and I would go down to the local newsagent type food hole, to pick up a few. Now my friends are as bent as corkscrews, so whilst waiting for Jamie to sort himself out and get his shoes on, I relaxed in the lounge and flicked though one of their many Gay Lifestyle type men’s mags. This was quite a novelty for me being all man and I quickly noted that all of the mags had vast sections dedicated to ‘fashion shoots’ which basically involved various young muscle bound models wearing next to nothing and trying to look all smouldering and shexy. This of course had no effect on myself in the pant department but it did lead to an interesting conversation on gay porno as we entered the local newsy boozy grub shack.

The zenith of which came when I was quietly explaining to my friend standing beside me that:

“I have noticed a lot more gay porn mags in newsagents lately. Look! There’s one up there!”....

Except my friend wasn’t standing beside me.

A man I had never met was standing beside me.

I was standing alone in a newsagents talking to a stranger about sissy jazz mags.

My dominant emotion was now that of embarrassment with a large dollop of bewilderment.

He looked at me like -WTF are you going on about mate!? Are you coming on to me or what?
We stared at each other as he joined the cue to purchase his beer and tabs. I thought about trying to explain to him that I was with someone else and that he was gay but I wasn’t, I was all man and that we were just having an innocent conversation about homo grumble mags because of the shexy men in his gay lifestyle magazine, but don't worry because they didn't do anything for me in the pant department...

But I decided that this would only make matters worse. So I just stood there with a kind of contorted, pained expression on my face for a moment.

After he paid for his goods, he glanced back at me as he was leaving and told me “you’re weird”.

Oh the shame.

Jamie came back with a fist full of lemons and asked me what that was all about. I told him and he pissed himself. We then went back and had yummy pancakes with lemon and sugar.
(L E T S G O "Stop buying into and spreading this shit", Sat 29 Nov 2008, 18:51, 2 replies)

*stares*

( Grokthought wouldn't pay that for Chinese 5-Spice, Sat 29 Nov 2008, 19:18, closed)

Pity he didn't cop the lemons
as well.

*click
(Juan Quar is clinging to her front teeth on, Sat 29 Nov 2008, 19:22, closed)