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This is a question Dad Jokes

We want to know the lame jokes your Dad makes. E.g. On your mum putting the roast on the table, "All for me? What are you going to eat?" On writing you a cheque for £350, "Three pound fifty? That's cheap." - What are the frankly rubbish gags your dad cracks again and again? WARNING: If you become a dad you'll be doing this stuff too.

(, Wed 10 Dec 2003, 2:09)
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2 jokes
1. Whenever leaving the house, or going somewhere, if my Dad was watching me go, after about 15 seconds he'd call me back. I'd turn around, walk back and he'd ask "How far would you have got if you hadn't come back?".

Took me years to spot this one coming and be able to call over my shoulder "twice as far up the road" without turning around.

2. At the dinner table, whenever we had food that involved either mustard or custard being on the table he'd ALWAYS pronounce them "mouse-turd" or "cows-turd" (as in "Pass the mouse-turd") with a hug grin on his face becasue he was being funny and rude at the same time in front of my Mum.
(, Thu 11 Dec 2003, 13:49, Reply)

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