sushi
eat this and you automatically become a gorgeous "sex and the city" girl glowing with vital good health and shimmering with sophistication.

the reality is a cold soggy mouthful of raw, dead fish. and salty sticky brown sauce. even the vegetarian sushi tastes like fish. and cold shit.

massive let-down!
( rachelswipe with a fork, Thu 26 Jun 2008, 14:39, 26 replies)

This is incredibly pathetic
but here goes nonetheless....

I can be a bit, well, anal about cleaning. I don't run around cleaning 24-7, but I do like to know that certain things are really, really, clean. Like the bathroom. And the kitchen.

So, I ordered one of those steam cleaners from fleabay. Shaped like a penguin (allegedly - I've seen biscuits that more closely resembled little flightless birds!). With a little blue light! How exciting!

It duly arrived, and was unpacked in a frenzy of anticipation. How much easier was cleaning going to be now? A quick swish over with this baby, and job done!

Actually, no. Not at all.

I read the instructions, filled it with water, switched it on and waited with baited breath. And waited. And waited. And waited. By the time the thing began to produce steam, I could have cleaned the bathroom twice. From top to bottom.

Eventually, it was ready. I went into the bathroom to give the loo a mighty blast of all-powerful steam. To say I was disappointed is like saying that Big Brother isn't very good.

It gave out this pathetic little belch of steam, most of which dissipated before even making contact with the pan. Rubbish. Complete and utter rubbish. I toyed with the idea of sending it back, but decided that for a tenner, what the hell had I expected.

I'd like to say that was the last piece of crap I bought on fleabay. But if I did, I'd be lying. I'm sure as the week goes on, more disappointments will come to mind, but this one popped up first. Because I finally binned the bloody cleaner last week, after it had been hiding at the back of a cupboard for about three years.
(TheWeeWitch hasn't been here much recently .., Thu 26 Jun 2008, 14:39, 4 replies)

diary of the dead
george, you need a fucking slap for this one, it makes land of the dead look good, which i didn't think was possible.
( Smash Monkey lowering the tone of the whole internet, Thu 26 Jun 2008, 14:39, 33 replies)

My marriage
3 years wasted. I've over the hurt now and think of it more in terms of how many macbooks I could have got if I never had to pay for the wedding. I can't afford one now & it really pisses me off.
(The Archduke of South London I'm in your Girlfriend eating her organs, Thu 26 Jun 2008, 14:38, 1 reply)

The Phantom Menace
Jar Jar Binks owes me two hours of my life. I want it back.
(Bicycle Repairman "you're also a bit of a wanker", Thu 26 Jun 2008, 14:38, 4 replies)

I would like to point out...
...that I am NOT the Freddy Woo as referenced in this week's question.

Clear?

It was a water bed, too. Oh, the humanity.
( Scaryduck LIKES EGG, Thu 26 Jun 2008, 14:37, Reply)

I think...
Alien Vs Predator Requiem could be up there..

The bastards.

++EDIT++

...And dont get me started about Highlander 2..
(Phlash, Thu 26 Jun 2008, 14:34, 4 replies)

My biggest disappointment?
About eight inches.






It's not what you've got, it's what you do with it.
(happylittletulip helpless and delicious, Thu 26 Jun 2008, 14:34, 8 replies)

An Essex band called Cinders Fall.
Now, i have to blame a mate of mine for this but:

He keeps bigging up this heavy metal band called Cinders Fall,.. so i went to see them, just to see what the fuss was about.

... I was disappointed, not only was there performance crap, but also the place was filled with 14 year olds, who couldn't even listen to any other genre of music before calling it shit.

So Cinders Fall, a band ripe for Kerwank.
(Looneytwuns, Thu 26 Jun 2008, 14:34, Reply)

Wine
I've never forgiven wine for not turning out to taste like super-fantastic-ultra-Ribena like I presumed it was when I was a kid. See it was the same colour as Ribena BUT I wasn't allowed to drink it. Therefore it must have been a special kind that those bastard adults were keeping to themselves. Fast forward ten years and turns out it tastes like naughty sandpaper. Damn you wine!
( Gleeballs is mostly made out of chocolate and hate., Thu 26 Jun 2008, 14:32, 4 replies)

When I went to see
I am Legend at the cinema.

What a load of shit.
(Bazongaloid, Thu 26 Jun 2008, 14:32, 23 replies)

Money, happiness does not buy
also

technology gets really boring when you are on your fourth upgrade (of anything).

Hi-Def is good, but not "I've got to tell the rest of the world" stunning.

LSD did nothing for me, so it was probably dud. That's maybe a Good Thing.

Jean-Michel Jarre at the Docklands. God it was awful.
( I_Was_Mordred, Thu 26 Jun 2008, 14:31, 11 replies)

May as well be the first of many whiny posts..
something or other our government has done or not done has really disappointed me.

let the political flamefest begin!
(casca Cracked one out on, Thu 26 Jun 2008, 14:31, Reply)

Is coming to the reality
that ive spent the last 15 years trashed and if i had saved some of my wages i would be a very rich man.
( Trollman, Thu 26 Jun 2008, 14:30, Reply)

Every time I go to the toilet for a poo
And I have to wipe more than once is a crushing disappointment.

I wish someone would tell me what the exact foodstuff is that you can eat that gives you a completely clean poo experience.

I'd eat it every day.

Unless it was liver, then I would just go on with the multiple-wiping
(Jugular, Thu 26 Jun 2008, 14:30, 7 replies)

YOUR MUM!

Sorry, but this qotw's been open 15 minutes already and nobody else got the second most obvious joke out of the way.
(LongJohnBaldry, Thu 26 Jun 2008, 14:29, Reply)

This qotw.
Sorry!
( girlinthehole, Thu 26 Jun 2008, 14:26, 2 replies)

Fast Food
Living in the UK, I sometimes get to visit the homeland (Canada). For a few weeks, before every time I go, I indulge myself in fantasies of the wonderful fast food that I just can't get over here.
Poutine from KFC...Taco Bell...Tim Horton's...
Then, inevitably, on the ride from the airport, we stop at one of those highway service centres, I order lots (gosh, it's getting expensive in Canada), sit down, drool, have a bite, and...
Yuck. Why did I ever think this would taste good?
I'm going back to Canada in August. I can't wait to go to Swiss Chalet!

Okay, I haven't got a great amount to be disappointed about, I guess.
(w4I4q1O1 was hard at work on, Thu 26 Jun 2008, 14:25, 5 replies)

Dad vs. God
Do not all boys feel their first great disappointment when they first realise 'Dad' and 'God' are two different people?
(bazmorningstar efil4nat3b, Thu 26 Jun 2008, 14:25, Reply)

My biggest dissapointment...
...would be if Gordon Freeman never talks. I don't care if he sounds like a falsetto singer on helium. He is just cool. Fin.

Proper post to come. Probably.
(TMAce needs to enter another image challenge sometime, Thu 26 Jun 2008, 14:24, Reply)

In-a-Gadda-da-Vida
That self-indulgent progrock classic by Iron Butterfly. Well, not the song itself, but the album by the same name. Having spotted that the "Best of Iron Butterfly" only included the 3-minute radio edit, I invested in the original album In-a-Gadda-da-Vida album. The 17 minutes of overblown, pompous jamming did not disappoint.

The rest of the album, however, was fucking shite.

No apologies for length - this is prog rock, after all
(LongJohnBaldry, Thu 26 Jun 2008, 14:24, 2 replies)

first time sex
"is that it?"

in retrospect, maybe i should have saved the threesome until we were a bit better at it.
( Smash Monkey lowering the tone of the whole internet, Thu 26 Jun 2008, 14:24, 26 replies)

Mine
Was that this QOTW suggestion didn't get chosen.
( mistaspakkaman and the inedible shifting caterpillars, Thu 26 Jun 2008, 14:19, 4 replies)

Oh god...
many things. Let's start with the most immediate: being an engineer.

You know how engineers are supposed to design all the cool stuff and be creative about how things are made and all that? Well, to some degree this is true- I do have some input on designing things. But it's generally done by a large group of people, and is only one small part of the job.

Wanna see part of what I do with my days?

Dear sirs:

Addressing your comments on the submittal:

1. Submit manufacturer’s catalog cuts and other data for the screen indicating details and materials of construction, capacity and operation, verifying conformance with the following requirements of Specification 11390, Article 2.01A and Contract Drawing No. P-3:
a. Capacity of 0.681 cubic foot of screenings per hour per Paragraph F.

Our climber screen capacity is rated in pounds rather than in volume, but based on the geometry of the rake and assuming that the debris fills it level to the top, we estimate the capacity to be in excess of 0.7 cubic yards per hour.

b. Stainless steel construction per Paragraphs G. J, K, L and O.

The applicable parts are stainless steel; however, the climber screen does not use a link chain or filter shafts. The specifications were written against a different machine, so not all of them apply.

c. Speed reducer design for AGMA 24-hour, Class II service per Paragraph M.

...and so on.

I know that this shit has to be done, but it is NOT what I was expecting to do.
( The Resident Loon Not a demographic. Do not measure., Thu 26 Jun 2008, 14:19, 8 replies)

mirrors
and that ratbag Kaol.

proper post to come
(Halfy By light alone, Thu 26 Jun 2008, 14:19, 5 replies)

being 3rd :(
and not being able to type it quick enough either
(Jester_, Thu 26 Jun 2008, 14:19, Reply)

Woo first!
My biggest disappointments come when I don't come first.

I'm afraid she'd say much the same thing though...

Speed: both a blessing, and a curse.
( Cawl, Thu 26 Jun 2008, 14:17, 5 replies)