* PFFT *I've been pretty farty all week, but 2 large helpings of sausage and lentil stew last night have really tipped things over the edge. I swear you can see these ones.
I'm here at work trying to hold them in so I (a) don't have to keep nipping to the loo like a madman and (b) don't gas half the office, but it's becoming increasingly difficult. I might rupture something if I'm not careful.
Tell us all about your own fartiness.
(
chthonic, Fri 13 Jul 2007, 14:01)
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Motorway Madness.I farted in the car this morning, and the noise it made was that similiar to someone slowly letting air out of a Fifi and the Flowerpots Kids Bouncy Castle.
It lasted for a good full on 5 seconds. Following that I could feel my arse burning like Glasgow Airport and the stench that arose was near like what I would describe as death - but in smell version.
My eyes watered, I was coughing, I couldnt hear the radio due to a hum in my ears, and I nearly hit the fucking central reservation.
Finally I managed to drop the windows and breathe again, only to see that all cars behind me had dropped off at least 50 yards as I had been all over the fucking road.
Never ever again will I eat pot noodles at 2 in the morning.
Length? - Not much, but Ill use Rohypnol and rape your front bum.
(, Wed 18 Jul 2007, 15:38, Reply)
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