As bored Third Formers in B set German............
......we bet Alan 'Flapper' (so named on account of protruding ears) Green that he wouldn't consume the contents of half full box of Parker blue-black ink cartridges (for cartridge pens - remember them?). He nobly picked up the challenge; though mainly because the challenge was cached in the winning phraseology "Oi Flapper! You fuckin' nancy, if you don't drink these cartridges now, I bet we'll stick them one by one right up yer fuckin' arse, and then we'll kick the crap out of you every day till the end of term" (And this was at a Grammar School - the comprehensive boys could be quite rough in comparison, you know).

Flapper set to, sipping what was obviously some fairly nasty fluid from cartridge number one. Roy Shepherd, our Northern long haired language teacher came in and began the lesson, until he noticed Flapper - who was by now on about the third cartridge of calligraphic goodness. Having been filled in that it was all a jolly sporting adolescent wager, Roy saß sich hin und watched and encouraged as a rapidly paling Flapper slowly worked his way through the box, sip by sip. Strangely, though the inside of his mouth was a deep blue, his face appeared to be changing to a pale green.

Finally, he completed the task to a big cheer from the class and Roy, who then told him to go to the bogs and rinse his mouth out.

Apologies for the above not being very funny - but what was absolutely pisswetting hilarious was that on his way down the corridor Flapper projectile vomited vitually black vomit all up the white painted wall of the corridor. Six times.

The stains could still be seen when I left the school three years later.
(Colonel Blink is now officially a pretentious prick, Tue 12 May 2009, 21:27, Reply)