My sister
recently bought a Polaroid camera from the 70's from eBay (I know nothing about such things so at present I can't tell you what it is). It cost her a mere tenner, bargain. Only she can't find film for it anywhere, so it sits on a shelf gathering dust.

She repeats with many other random items on a weekly basis.
(ThePony, Sat 23 May 2009, 22:35, 4 replies)

not a buy, but an impulse.
I applied to go on a new reality TV show where they arrange a date with the ex that you want to get back together with.
(apeloverage committed the vile act of onanism on, Sat 23 May 2009, 19:22, 4 replies)

Bright Pink Cowboy Shirt
One of the few really nice sunny days in 2007, I was doing some shopping in the afternoon (after a few pints of cider over lunch with a friend, which might partly explain things), and I just liked it.

I got it home, got it out the bag, looked at it and realised I'd made a mistake straight away. It just wasn't very me - mainly because I wasn't a lumberjack on a Gay Pride march.

It sat in my wardrobe for months until one day when I bounded out of bed in the morning with a spring in my step and a song in my heart, flung open my wardrobe, saw it among the other, drab shirts, and just thought "Fuck it! It's the 21st Century, it's summer, it's London, if a man can't pull off a pink cowboy shirt on a sunny day like today, then when can he do it?".

I got about five minutes down the road to work before some kid standing outside school with his mates shouted at me.

"Oi, Brokeback Mountain, where's your boyfriend?"

I gave it to the Charity shop.
(SnowyTheWereRabbit the Leporid from Hell, Sat 23 May 2009, 18:58, 4 replies)

A comic book and a truck.
Around 25 years ago I was with several friends at a sprawling new and used comic book, game and music shop by the name of Jelly's; residents of Honolulu at the time will remember that wonderful place before area development forced it out of its near Ala Moana location (twice) and into its slow decline in Pearl City.

While I was busy haggling over the price of a 1964 vintage Risk board game (I ended up nabbing it for $5 - and the card deck inside was still sealed when I got home and opened it up: score!) another friend was lifting some obscure new indy comic book from its hidey-hole among its thousands of other plastic sleeved neighbors and calling out to me, "hey, I dare you to buy this!" After giving the cover a cursory glance, I laughed and said, "sure; I'll take that one." I figured with the amazing find I had just acquired, losing some money on a crappy indy comic was an appropriate penance.

It was a new copy of Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles, #1; the good, non-Archie series. 6 months later, with new issues being released and the first printing of the first issue already being valued at over $400, I told my friend to track down more impulse buys for me. "Just pull another one from the rack; it'll be a hit in a couple of months, guaranteed."


7 years ago I visited a friend in AZ who was driving several for-sale Pinzgauers around the town of Prescott and, after spending a few hours that week behind the wheel of a 712K (radio wagon, full steel shell) I knew I must have one. I returned to CO and contacted a local Pinzgauer dealer, who arranged several test drives in both M- and K-wagons. I selected the one I wanted, added a few convenience and comfort options on the checklist and spent a few weeks on the paperwork, title transfer and registration before taking delivery and preparing to drive my truck along the back roads home, the better to avoid the crazies on the interstate.

As I arrived at the dealer's lot, among the scores of other surplus military vehicles I saw a tiny, bright yellow utility truck which, the dealer explained to me, was the Pinzgauer's precursor and known as the Haflinger. The model I was staring at had a combination of rare factory installed options which made it particularly appealing; it was the later Series 2 chassis with a polyshell/fiberglass cab, a longer wheelbase for a more useful loading bed, and a PTO for attachment of whatever it is you connect a PTO to.

I didn't really think about all those bits, or the near-$18,000 I had just dropped on licensing, registration, insurance and purchase of my Pinzgauer, or the $12,000 the Haflinger's window tag was commanding. I just knew it was cute - and I wanted it. I turned to the dealer and said, "oh hell; wrap it up".

Did it completely flatten my finances? Yes, and then some. Have I ever regretted my impulse purchase? No; not even when driving up the Rampart road in winter with no heat and covered in layers of cotton and wool with my arm hanging out over the no-window summer door with chill winds filling the cab.
( Felis Concolor, Sat 23 May 2009, 18:43, 4 replies)

Hahahaha, my boyfriend just reminded me of this.
Last Sunday night, we had quite a shaker of an earthquake - only 4.7 but it shook the house like buggery for 20 seconds (which is a LONG time when you don't know if it's "the big one" coming).
Once I'd calmed down (3 beers and 6 cigs later), he found me on the computer looking up earthquake survival kits........

Didn't buy one, but have since gone and strapped all my freestanding stuff to the wall!
( Batshitmentalist is sane for once, Sat 23 May 2009, 18:39, Reply)

Last summer when I toddled across the pond to visit home for a couple of weeks.
After a gruelling journey across the Atlantic, followed by a train to Hull, I spent the next day wandering around town.
The day after that, Papa (my mums partner, I call him Papa) and I went to York for the day. We were passing a shop, and I looked in and was "oooooh, 6 pounds? Only 6 pounds? I'm buying it".

So with glee I took my purchase up to the counter, paid my six pounds and said "please wrap it up very very carefully as it has to go all the way back to California".
Never mind that it also had to travel to Stafford for a few days, followed by a few days in that there Londinium.

After a fun couple of weeks in England, I then boarded the plane at Heathrow for my journey back to California. After landing in glorious sunshine and getting massive hugs from my boyfriend, I opened up my suitcase.

I unwrapped my new precious, fearing the worst. But alas! It was still in one piece!! "Hurrah" I cried. And offered there and then to use it. "Oh, yes please" said my boyfriend and his daughter.

And so we all had a lovely jubbly cup of tea:


( Batshitmentalist is sane for once, Sat 23 May 2009, 16:44, 3 replies)

ta ta tattoo
I impulse bought a tattoo. I wasn't even drunk (although I was 17, so about as stupid as your average drunk). And not a nice discreet tattoo either, one on my upper arm.

It cost £30. I loved it for....ooooh, about three weeks. Then I realised it was truly terrible and hated it with a burning passion. It took me ten years to get round to getting it removed (and for the price of doing so to get less prohibitive) It cost me about £1000 in laser treatments.. But it's gone! Totally completely. And I'm so fucking happy about it! Worst £30 I ever spent, but by far the best £1000.
(mookroolz, Sat 23 May 2009, 15:04, 3 replies)

Las Vegas does strange things to your head
When I went there recently I didn't gamble, but bought a load of swearing toy parrots as gifts for my family.

WTF was I thinking of? We had to smuggle them onto the plane home under the dirty washing, they screamed 'Hey you! Go fuck yourself!' every time the cases got knocked and now they're sitting beside my telly, sneering at me, knowing I'm too chicken to hand them over to my uptight folks.

I can only ask myself, what was wrong with a nice fridge magnet?
(Juan Quar is clinging to her front teeth on, Sat 23 May 2009, 13:11, Reply)

Student Loan:
Squire Telecaster - Used maybe once or twice 'coz it hurt to play after having drunk too much and I shredded my fingers.

Warren Zevon Disocgraphy - Best musical purchase I've ever made.

Sony Ericsson C902 - Aye, didn't really need to replace the old one, but okay... (and I needed a new digicam)

Lots of alcohol and a kebab flung into the mix.

Length? Not too big, 'coz of the shame!
(Mr. Cunt put the indy in kindy., Sat 23 May 2009, 12:50, 4 replies)

Noticed a lot of stories about e-bay
However, don't let your three year old at the computer
(Potty Jag har smör i min rumpspringa, Sat 23 May 2009, 12:03, 1 reply)

The exact text message I received from my mate:

"Joe's just got all pissed and bought an 11,000 watt angle grinder off of Ebay. The kind used for cutting up boats!"
( Turquoise Hexagon Sun has just dropped acid on, Sat 23 May 2009, 11:59, 4 replies)

Shanghai
I was in Shanghai on my own, exploring. I was living in a small city in China and after a few months of lacking what I consider basic food necessities - cheese, oregano, thai curry paste - had gone to Shanghai to stock up. I'd found the Western supermarket (eventually), dropped a lot of coin and then adjourned to the bar which was conventiently in the hotel plaza which also housed the supermarket.

Several jars later, I emerged blinking into the warm sunlight to be surrounded by numerous street hawkers selling watches, handbags and the like. I bethought to myelf that it was time for a new watch, for the pleasant friendly chaps were proffering ones that were upmarket and stylish - just like me. They were able to speak English and when they said the watch I liked was RMB400, I managed to haggle them down to 100 (now about 10 quid), and the exchange was done.

I walked away feeling pretty chuffed with my haggling - a 75% discount, no less!

Fucking thing only worked for a week.
(McChinaman banned, Sat 23 May 2009, 11:53, 2 replies)

I Bought My Local Pub
.
On a whim. It had bee up for sale for a while and the only people interested were property developers who wanted to de-license it and turn it into two houses.

I wasn't fucking having that! So I bought it.

To be fair - I did have an ulterior motive. I'd once been barred from it in the most bizzare circumstances. Some trouble had kicked off between my ex and the landladies daughter. The daughter had verbally lashed my ex for her treatment of me - cheating on me when I was working away - and a massive scene had taken place. It ended with the landlady barring my ex, her new boyfriend and, for some unexplicable reason, me! I was 300 miles away at the time!

At least if I owned the pub I couldn't get barred again.

Cheers
( Legless Mister Stabby - shanks for the memory, Sat 23 May 2009, 11:31, 2 replies)

I bought an 'adult' DVD on a whim
I wasn't that impressed when I finally watched it. Loads of men and women performing all kinds of sexytiem shenanigans, men with men and women, women with women and men, everyone writhing about in a pool full of what looked like puy lentils. Quite disturbing!

Yep! They were "in-pulse bi's"*

/Coat
/Veal


*I've said it before but out-convolute THAT fucker Pooflake!
(Captain Placid 24/7 ball gags, brownie mix and clown porn, Sat 23 May 2009, 8:54, 5 replies)

Impulse buying
For me there have been a few things.

I brought an exercise bike of gumtree.com for free. I had to pick it up though. Its current useage is for a scrarf stand.

A £125 pair of new rock boots with the springs which have almost fallen apart. I brought them in mid december. :(

A hairclip costing £3.19 which I can't wear because it has rubber in.

My red knitted scraf which I brought of this woman who I used to do some drama stuff with.

A very large selection of books, including one titled "Why we hate US" which is directed at self loathing americans and degrades their society.
(ubiquitous writhing garlic, Sat 23 May 2009, 7:27, 3 replies)

Impulse refusals
Kinda different, innit?

Husband brought a new truck and while picking out options, I said I didn't want the radio that came with it. I planned to put in a much much nicer one and didn't want to pay for some piece of shit radidio I'd just rip out.

The happy day came and I went to pick it up. I looked at it before signing the papers and noticed-oh my goodness!- there was a fucking radio in the thing! I reminded the smarmy salesman I had specially requested no radio and asked why the fuck was it there? His wussy explanation was well, it came with the truck, and it was a lot of trouble to take out and oh by the way I owed $250.00 for it.

As I hadn't signed the papers I merely smiled, said, "Gee that's too bad. It's not what I asked for and I don't want it." and walked out. He ran after me sputtering, "But, but you have to take it, you ordered it..." I leaned forward and whispered "No, I don't."

He eventually ended up yanking the radio at his expense, with us paying $250 bucks less than the original price. I loved the fact he thought he could pull that kind of shit on a woman. And that I would take it.


hee hee hee. Don't fuck with a hillbilly.
(TDub Nunc id vides, nunc ne vides on, Sat 23 May 2009, 0:51, 5 replies)

He's not, honest
Whilst on holiday in Las Vegas a couple of weeks ago, my boyfriend impulse purchased a t-shirt which simply said "I am NOT retarded". Well if the t-shirt says so...
(claireyfairy There's a smell in here that will outlast religion, Sat 23 May 2009, 0:31, 2 replies)

A steamer
We impulse bought a steamer, used it once and never used it again. The Homer Simpson toastie maker gets more action FFS.
(claireyfairy There's a smell in here that will outlast religion, Sat 23 May 2009, 0:25, 3 replies)

I bid £170,000 on a freehold pub on the isle of white.
Being a bit drunk my cunning plan was to approach a brewery who would give me the money to tie the pub to them. Couldn't fail, and I was sure £170k would be the winning bid.

I woke up with a hangover to discover I'd been out bid by £5k. Thank fuck for that.
( CowJam, Sat 23 May 2009, 0:22, 1 reply)

Oh, G.
I was thinking about how best to address the question of the "impulse buy" when I was thinking about Georgina, my second ex-wife - for those of you who are aware of the sorry tale, Georgina was my sixteen-day wife.

There was a *lot* of impulse buying within my relationship with Georgina but I think the biggest way of describing impulse is to describe the first eleven days of our relationship.

Day1 (Thursday) - email Georgina via a website; she'd posted what I believed to be a tongue-in-cheek ad

Day2 (Friday) - receive reply

Day3 (Saturday) - no contact

Day4 (Sunday) - no contact

Day5 (Monday) - more contact via website and email through PM system; SMS during Monday evening when I was visiting a friend

Day6 (Tuesday) - agree to meet that evening in London for dinner; lose my mind (not really lost, it was already gone) and, within two hours of having met her, ask her to marry me. She treats it as being flippant. Walk from restaurant to London Eye via Tesco where we get a bottle of champagne which we spray together into the Thames. Spend night at hotel together.

Day7 (Wednesday) - email. A lot. Grin (a lot (me)). Flippancy confirmed by email.

Day8 (Thursday) - ask her to accompany me to Prague that weekend where I need to collect my car and drive it back to UK having left it there a few weeks previously. Spend much of Thursday kicking myself about flippancy of comment on Tuesday evening and worry about having cocked up spectacularly.

Day9 (Friday) - in the morning, take an hour off work and visit jeweller at Canary Wharf. Spend £2500(ish) on single diamond in white gold engagement ring. In the afternoon, meet Georgina at Paddington to go to Heathrow where I keep ring on me throughout, including asking security chap at terminal 2 to not ask me to take it out and show it to him. Travel to Prague; spend evening in Crowne Plaza Hotel in Prague Dejvice.

Day10 (Saturday) - walking across Charles Bridge in the middle of Prague, I go down on one knee, and asked her to marry me. She said yes. We drive the 700km to Koln, our stop-off point on the route to Calais.

Day11 (Sunday) - arrive in Calais late morning, and whilst waiting for ferry I get a very interesting (no, really) lecture in cloud formations. Ferry; arrive in UK. Drive to my new place that I was renting for a year. On arrival, I ask the question "so, you moving in then?" to which she replies "yeah, alright then".

End of tale. Ed = dickhead for having cocked it up SO spectacularly. Much as I wish she did, she doesn't read b3ta as far as I know, so I can write this next with near impunity:

Georgina I love you with my whole heart and I miss you. It's been 715 days since you left and I love you and miss you more today than I loved you and missed you 714 days ago but less than I will tomorrow; please, put me out of my misery.
(Eds Meds Mathskillz=1,Socialskillz=0, Fri 22 May 2009, 23:06, 14 replies)

My mother...
...with the bestest possible intentions has gone and bought me a (small) dining room table and chairs because "They were just sooooo cheap." Unfortunately my abode (as much as I love it - and fuck knows I pay enough for it) is, well, tiny.

I've just spent two evenings rearranging my existing furniture (all of which I love in a manly and heterosexual way) and I've come to the conclusion that it just aint going to fit - unless something else gets downsized.

So - do I:

a: Tell Mammy Hat 'thanks but no thanks,' offend her (easily done) and have to put up with the frosty atmosphere that it entails for the next fuck knows how long...

or

b: Downsize one of my sofas to an armchair or maybe get a smaller TV/DVD type unit (neither which I can't really afford.)
Daddy Hat has said he'd help me out if I need to buy anything (to keep the peace), but as he's retired I'm not about to take him up on that.

Any advice gratefully recieved.

Although I'll probably just c: Man The Fuck Up, stop shifting furniture, drink some more beer and carry on watching the boxing.
( TheMattInAHat has a particular... odour..., Fri 22 May 2009, 23:05, 8 replies)

Big is goooood. No.
I've been scouring the web on the search for a travel cot for my baby daughter which might double up as a baby cage. I found the Little Life Arc 3. A hexagonal travelcot with a 4 ft diameter. Comfy to sleep in, and lots of place to play. It even comes with a UV cover for outdoor use.

It was delivered the next day to my delight and I happily put up the 4ft diameter hexagon in the 5ft diameter square living room of mine and was happy.

My partner, the spoilsport, made me return it, because allegedly it would be no good as it wouldn't fit into any normal sized spare room or ferry cabin or tent.
(widowwadman can't think of anything to say as usual, Fri 22 May 2009, 22:05, 1 reply)

fucking granite tiles

1500 square metres of the bastarding things. EVERY CUNTING ONE OF THEM THE SAME SIZE 1 FOOT X 1 FOOT... half are actually quite nice the other half would only do for hospitals... so there you go, 30'000 euro of a dept sitting in a warehouse. uncuntfuckingmovable.

anybody want some really cheap granite tiles ?
(The Cats Twat, Fri 22 May 2009, 21:54, 5 replies)

Food, and lots of it
Until recently, I used to be nearly constantly hungry, eating anything and not putting on a kilo. This was not a good thing when walking past a fast food shop...

I hate fast food. It's all kind of vile. I'd rather eat Ann Widdicombe's pube infested knickers rather than eat a Big Mac normally... but when hungry, I ate. So it was I found myself consuming four of these putrid contrivances in one sitting in an attempt to satisfy my stomach.

Not a good plan. Each once settled in my gut like the finest builders concrete. Then they lodged. For three days the pressure grew inside me. I could feel it settling, like a small warband of vikings wanting to get out. Over the days the viking upgraded from fists, to sticks, to axes. I was running to the toilet every couple of hours, trying to shift it, but nothing came out.

Woke up on the third day. From somewhere, the vikings had found a battering ram, set it on fire and were making anew their escape attempt from my colon. Ran to the toilet, screwed up my eyes and pushed.

*POP*

A solid lump of shit came flying from my arse, followed by a liquid fountain of foul black tar. It felt like I was back with my old boyfriend after a good solid rogering. The spray of liquid shit hit the toilet, bounced and fell back down in a light shower, turning the bathroom in to a medieval cesspit. All I can say is, thank god for wetrooms.

Next time I went to Burger King instead.
(Potty Jag har smör i min rumpspringa, Fri 22 May 2009, 21:41, 3 replies)

Yet another car related one...
...seems to be somewhat of a recurring theme in this QOTW.

Not me this time but a mate.

Said mate is well into cars, and since before I met him, (around 6 years ago) has been driving Subaru Imprezas. For those with no interest in petrol powered vehicular transport; its fast. As fuck.

All those baseball capped cocks in Corsas with exhausts like an commercial sized can of baked beans?

They want to be driving one of these...things.

However, all this performance means that they are slightly costly to run, and said mate being slightly anal about servicing, warranties and the like, (a blown engine in the past has taught him to be cautious) spends a small fortune on keeping the thing in tip top order.

So, with a spring in his step, Hat's Mate takes his latest pride and joy to have her (yes - it's a female) annual check up knowing that she has only been fed the finest petroleum distillates and rubbed down up regularly with the highest quality soaps and waxes...




...and leaves the dealers an hour later with a new, higher spec pride and joy...




Apparently the cost of a full service as well as new brake disks and pads all round as well as the cost of and updated warranty meant that it somehow made better financial sense to get a new car.

Sounded like bollocks to me, and quite frankly listening to him explain the reasons behind his decision was akin to listening to an MP try to justify the rent boys, KY jelly and donkey porn recently claimed back on expenses as 'miscellaneous entertainment'.


18 months later?

Yep. exactly the same thing again.

The fucking dealer must be rubbing his hands together every time he sees that man pull onto the forecourt...
( TheMattInAHat has a particular... odour..., Fri 22 May 2009, 21:23, 3 replies)

this seems to be turning into some sort of autotrader look at my motah thing
i've had 4 of these...

media.photobucket.com/image/s2000/dorby/S2000%20silverstone/DSC03612.jpg

loved every one, dont take my word though comes out tops every year on the JD power survey. superb little car...

only impulse buy was to move out to the exact epicenter of fuck all and as a direct result have to drive one of these...

imageonthefly.autodatadirect.com/images/?IMG=80NIGEB1.jpg

which is clearly pish

*sulks*
( spimf ™ is whoever you want him to be, Fri 22 May 2009, 21:18, 9 replies)

Time to post methinks.
My friend and I once bought two tequila shots on impulse the first day we met and now we're engaged...so if you call the price of a shot leading to the cost of wedding based activities a disaster or triumph, it certainly is an impulse caused event. I also have a hobby of going into shops and asking about their display boxes/posters. Basically in a sort of 'can I have that' way. It started with just asking about smallish items from favourite games/films but has extended into massive sale posters from most high street stores, twelve unwanted mannequins, uniforms from marks and spencer, woolworths (retro value one day i'm sure) and john lewis. That's not exactly impulse buying but it's certainly filling my house
(fruit_larceny is some kind of communist superman, Fri 22 May 2009, 20:58, Reply)

Like may people, after playing a shitload of Guitar Hero,
I figure I could probably have the skillz to do it for real.

Now, I'm not a complete guitar virgin- I did have an acoustic 6-string when I was in primary school and knew a handful of chords, and I also had an electric bass from 14-18 with an amplifier of sorts, even did a couple of battle-of-the-bands with my college mates. But that was 19 years ago.

So, about 2 years ago I suddenly get an urge to try my hand at the real thing. Of all places, Toys-r-Us do a Squier Strat (a cheap copy of the immortal Fender Stratocaster) kit with a guitar, a gig bag, an instructional DVD, some picks (plectums. Sorry, Plectri...?) and a lead and a matchbox-sized practice amp for £130.

SOLD.

Walked out with it under my arm and was pretty pleased with myself. Went home, twanged about, felt chuffed.

Now the story takes a turn along the same lines as MiracleFish's story down there.

It's an electric guitar alright, yeah, I can hear but it's a bit tinny.

Next day, off to the music shop. Medium-sized amp bought.Rockin'!
It's quite loud now, SHAZAM!

But- the quality of the Squier is a bit suspect, little details et cetera such as knob engraving, fretwork, bridge and machine heads all a bit cheap... back in the music shop I was perusing what was on offer and an identical Fender Strat was on sale... the real deal!
. Part x'd my Squier strat in for a proper Fender... Result! The action is much better, the quality is much better allround and I am suddenly a better player because of the superior equipment!

But the gain/overdrive/reverb on the amp is a bit limited. It might be holding me back from the Rock God I could potentially be...

Next week, back to the music shop for a multiple effects unit.

It's groovy now, flanger/phaser/chorus/echo/reverb/overdrive/compressor/pitch shifter/compressor/noise gate and of course a Wah-wah. And a shitload of presets that can make you sound like you're playing anything from a Marshall Stack with an all-valve head to a Mesa Boogie. Fantastic!

All was well. Then Prof Kenny Martin let it be known that he had a maHOOsive 2x12 twin hybrid amp with enough power to saw adamantium in half, a mere bagatelle for £xxx (classified). I was in.

GREAT! I Now have all the power, all the sounds, a decent guitar, and NOW...

I can currently play some early Cult and easy Iron Maiden (one of the guitarists, anyway).

If success is 1% inspiration, 99% perspiration, then my guitar playing career so far is 99% investment in equipment, 1% skill....
( Rotating Wobbly Hat That's not a banana. THIS is a banana., Fri 22 May 2009, 20:41, 3 replies)

Many and various, but
my expensive hat stand was the stupidest.



Especially as I joined Fitness First a month after buying it....
( Ril3y is a brit abroad.. bring on the Stella / Asahi, Fri 22 May 2009, 20:37, Reply)

hmmmm...
i've lurked about on b3ta for years, never even bothered with logging, just happy to peruse, but recently made my first post... (although, i think i may have drunkenly commented slightly before that), anyhoo, i'm noticing that this particular qotw is inspiring plenty others in a similar boat up till now to crawl up to some land and light their own little beach fires of interest....... fair enough, but, am i alone in drawing a distinction between an 'impulse buy' and a 'OMG i was so feckin pissed' buy???

all said, i love b3ta, it's t'home of t'best ont'internet....... mwa!!
(cheese-on-toast, Fri 22 May 2009, 19:31, Reply)