Parking over drains
Whenever I park my van I MUST open the door and look to see there is not a drain. I have a morbid fear of losing my keys down that gateway to doom.
( djrich - Live from Houghton Regis got this thing for Clémence Poésy, Thu 29 Jan 2004, 17:40, Reply)

I hate, really hate,
cling film. It curls up and goes all scrunchy and sticks to things I don't want it to, including my hand. And that serrated edge on the box that's supposed to be for cutting it on is never sharp enough, and I end up struggling so much that if I ever finally do manage to detach a piece from the roll it's all scrunched up and no good. Whoever invented cling-film should be suspended from their ankles inches above a fiery pit of doom for all eternity. Whilst wrapped in their own evil invention.
( Comma, Thu 29 Jan 2004, 17:28, Reply)

Be Afraid... Be Very Afraid...
Apologies in advance for v. long post.

As a child when I went shopping with my mother we used to park the car in the Multi-Story car park. I used to have nightmares about said car park, which had a long spiral ramp which seemed to go on forever. In these dreams I would be in the car park and the entrance to the ramp would be in darkness. I would slowly, powerlessly, be drawn towards this ramp, and down, down, down into the depths below. Needless to say, the concrete surface had transformed into something more slippery than teflon, and I would find myself, wearing only socks on my feet, helplessly slipping down towards unknown horrors below. With Teeth.

Gary Larson, cartoonist of "The Far Side" defines "luposlipophobia" as a fear of being chased by timber wolves around a kitchen table whilst wearing socks on a newly-polished floor. This great cartoon is similar to the Car Park ramp thing.

I also hate making telephone calls, especially to strangers, and even more especially if I actually want something from them and have to ask for it, such as an overdraft, a date, etc. This could be why I have: a) No Money; and b) No Girlfriend.

Things That Look Like Snakes. Whilst walking, especialy in the dark, any stick, piece of wire, tree root, that looks like a snake can turn me into a gibbering wreck. Funnily enough actual snakes do not bother me.

Large Dogs. I once had a friend whose house had two back doors and no front door. To ring the doorbell I had to open the gate and walk through the garden, past his pet Alsatian. I knew for a fact this dog was as soft as anything, but it still scared me s.h.1.t.less to actually open the gate whilst this creature stood looking at me, drooling. In fact any large black and brown dog, such as Dobermann or Rottweiler is scary.

Wasps. In daylight, outside, they are just a nuisance, but at night, in my bedroom, they may as well be vampires, demons or whatever. I cannot sleep until said "wee stripey bastard" has been removed and all doors and windows are sealed to a standard which Fort Knox can only dream of.

Whether this is something to do with the Car Park thing I don't know but I hate the idea of walking/cycling/driving down really steep hills. Up is fine, but going down, especially, for example, on an icy road with a sharp bend at the bottom, not nice.

Cows are evil. I'm sure of it. They know I eat beef and drink milk and they want their own back. Walk through a field of cows? In the dark? No way! I'd rather sit in a river...

Except...

SWANS!! Aaaaaagh! The biggest, most vicious, evil bird in the UK. They can break a man's arm you know. Not so bad when they are in the park lake and you are on the bank feeding them crusts of bread, but you try being in a small inflatible dinghy trying to outrun one, when you have already seen it chip the paint on a metal narrowboat with its beak, because it thought its reflection was a rival swan. My friend (see below) once saw a swan deliberately drown a small terrier for pinching some of its bread and growling at it.

My friend is afraid of Moths. He can skin and chop up a rabbit, walk through fields full of cows / bulls, but anything "flappy" such as moths and daddy-long-legs and he is reduced to a little girl crying for daddy.

Don't even get me started on my Obsessive-Compulsive fears which could fill another page
( Amos E Wolfe makes vinyl signs and things like that, Thu 29 Jan 2004, 17:13, Reply)

the alien noise sound in the film 'Contact'
I don't know why but the noise they make when they are sending a message to Jodie Foster scares the living daylights out of me. I possibly like the film more than is warranted because of the scaryness of that noise...
( Staticgirl, Thu 29 Jan 2004, 17:10, Reply)

I've just noticed
that this irrational fear was my "lies parents tell" entry.

I wonder if his is rooted in the same reason?
( watashi-wa Evenin'!, Thu 29 Jan 2004, 17:05, Reply)

Large fruit/vegetables
This is not me, honest. It is the sister of a friend of mine. She's terrified of outsized fruit or veg. Particularly those massive mushrooms you get. "Open cup mushrooms" I think they're called.
(The Black Labrador, Thu 29 Jan 2004, 17:02, Reply)

Helen Daniels
Quite a few years ago, when i was pretty small, there was a character in 'Neighbours' called Helen Daniels (if i remember correctly). Helen was an old woman who loved to paint. At one point she developed a shakey hand which terrified me, and i think she fell off a ladder as well. So every time Helen came on screen I would run out of the room and refuse to come back in until she was gone... if that aint irrational i dont know what is...
(kimothy, Thu 29 Jan 2004, 17:01, Reply)

Penguins
i'm totally serious here, they freak me out. I can't even go t the aquarium/ zoo anymore. They're waddling everywhere, ruining my life...
(lielielie, Thu 29 Jan 2004, 16:58, Reply)

Irrational Fears
Chimps.

Yes, chimpanzees. Allegedly cute, but actually evil malevolent, freakishly strong cannibals. (It's true!) With weird deformed arses. The mere sight of them makes me nervous.

Doesn't matter if they're picking fleas off each other, or shifting pianos and drinks tea, they're just creepy and I DON'T LIKE THEM.

Not quite an irrational fear, but...
( Tepid_Halibut felt like a cold, empty shell of a human...until, Thu 29 Jan 2004, 16:48, Reply)

Telephones
me too . . . thank god for text messaging and email. I think it's got something to do with not being able to see the person at the other end, which may be related to my other irrational fear of people in costumes that cover their heads - like the ones at Disneyland. However much I'd like to go and ride the big rides, I'd freak out if Mickey or Pluto or any of the others came near.
(vague, Thu 29 Jan 2004, 16:44, Reply)

i agree with johnny8085...
boobahs are fucking shit scary
( Naive Amoeba Bored Cig, Thu 29 Jan 2004, 16:42, Reply)

Tweenies....
I have a fear of the Tweenines and Boobars.... thats god auful kids programs, i dont know why but they scare me!!
(Jimmy8085, Thu 29 Jan 2004, 16:26, Reply)

Tin Foil
Bloody Frightning. It's all ewww.... I don't like it. I'm off. I'm feeling a bit edgy just writing about it.
(King In Crimson, Thu 29 Jan 2004, 16:19, Reply)

Dickie Davies
BWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!


Sorry.

Reminds me of this lad that lived next door and his scrapbook had loads of pictures of Morecambe and Wise in it.
(odysseysounds.com, Thu 29 Jan 2004, 16:15, Reply)

world of sport
as a kid I was actually scared of Dickie Davies who presented saturday's World Of Sport on ITV.

Didn't mind Daleks and all that conventionally scary stuff.

But if Dickie came on I'd run out the room bawling my eyes out.

My mum made me do a scrap book of all the things I like on one page and all the things I don't like on the other.

Dickie is there. Of course !
(schminkypinky, Thu 29 Jan 2004, 15:56, Reply)

baked beans
i don't know why

- and useing other peoples cuterly and people eatting off my plate.
(Ktyashy, Thu 29 Jan 2004, 15:54, Reply)

More Bullshit
The sea. It's really big and powerful, but it captivates me as well. Actually, I think maybe I'm just in awe of it.


Also crazy people, you know, the really delirious ones that are famous in your home town for simply being mad? They were sane once right? RIGHT?!
(Tommy B!, Thu 29 Jan 2004, 15:38, Reply)

Rover Car Emblems
I can't walk infront of a Rover without shivering, I've convinced myself that there are "rays" coming out of the badges.
( Analogue Warthog, Thu 29 Jan 2004, 15:24, Reply)

I don't know why...
I realised last night, whilst walking through Leeds City Centre, that I'm really afraid of people running at night time. No-one runs for the sake of it, it makes me scared that I'm going to get mugged or murdered.
(Tommy B!, Thu 29 Jan 2004, 15:21, Reply)

Worms...bloody nasty things...
When I was ten or eleven I was eating a walnut, I wasn't quite sure how old it was but I ate it anyway. I had been careful to crack the walnut into two perfect halves so that after I had eaten the nut I could turn the shell into a couple of little boats (I was bored). Anyway, I set on of them in the water and then I see a white thing moving around in it. I looked closer. It was a worm. Looking at me. I immediatly threw the shell away, tried to vomit out the stuff I had swallowed, which didn't work. So then I was convinced for about a year that one of those worms was living in my stomach and was gonna come out my belly button. yech.
(Mreek, Thu 29 Jan 2004, 15:17, Reply)

Frosted Glass
The manufactured kind, not the "real" frozen kind. The only thing that gives me the chills. I can't even think about it, let alone touch it/look at it.

Nothing else really bothers me, but just typing about frosted glass is making me twitch. The worst is when you go to a pub/someones house and they have pint/half-pint glasses made of the stuff.
(alfwine buggerbridge, Thu 29 Jan 2004, 15:11, Reply)

Irrational fears from Childrens' tv
Just remembered being scared by Parsley the Lion (from The Herb Garden) and an episode of a very obscure cartoon where a kissing plant (!) took over, all tentacles etc holding down planes, possibly Oscar and the Alien ..? Also an episode of Dick Emery's tv series where the old man Lampwick sat through a seance which he mocked, then when he was left on his own everything kicked off, "Dramarama" - Exorcism of Amy...

This is turning into a thread for the TVcream website isn't it? Never mind the Radio Times scary moments edition, how about your inapropriately scary moments from childrens tv or comedy series?
(Glen Moranjie, Thu 29 Jan 2004, 15:09, Reply)

panpipes
i can't explain this deepseated fear. i have had it as long as i can remmeber. the sound of panpipes makes me very edgey, i will go long way through town sometimes if i hear a distant busker in the centre of ipswich corn hill. as the driving theory test centre is on the edge of the busking hot sopt, i failed my theory test twice. both times some poncho wearing raggamuffin with his infernal tootleing put me off i tell you!
( zanzibar, Thu 29 Jan 2004, 15:06, Reply)

Irrational fears
Like a previous poster I was a bit of scared of mirrors in the dark. I also dislike intensely the moment when a train that I am riding goes into a dark tunnel. I stress this is not Freudian in any way.
(Glen Moranjie, Thu 29 Jan 2004, 14:59, Reply)

Telephones...
I just can't phone people up. It's unexplanable, but I just can't. Well I can sort of, but it scares the shit out of me to do it. I don't mind answering the phone, and I don't mind (much) if I know there's going to be an answering machine on the other end, but I just can't seem to do it...

Stupid isn't it...
(richietheg my dad buries dead people. he's an undertaker., Thu 29 Jan 2004, 14:37, Reply)

I'm like soooo fat! ugh.... God i'm enormous! Not like that Kate Moss. Well thin she is. Do i really look like Lisa Riley? aaahhhh..... (altho she was better than that cranberry who now does you've been framed)
ah - the angst of a superficial empty-calorie fuelled consumer society.
(magictorch, Thu 29 Jan 2004, 14:37, Reply)

Polystyrene
Horrible, horrible, horrible polystyrene! The way it squeaks whenever its being touched (and sometimes when it's not) and balloons do it too!!! And sometimes if I just imagine the sound of them it makes me nervous, and I'm incapable of doing anything for about 5 minutes.


Oh, and Elton John scares me too (because he's sooooooo gay!)
(chewbakayoko, Thu 29 Jan 2004, 14:32, Reply)

monkeys with big teeth
monkeys...i hate baboons. really hate. I got chased by a rabid one once - yellow dripping fangs. but chimpanzees are really sweet things. weird.

and grammar. i want to cry when someone says '2nd person plural pronoun' or 'gerund'...i turn into a big gibbering heap.

Isn't standing on three manhold covers unlucky? I have to walk on a road with 3 manhole covers several times a day...the number of people who step around them is huge.
(feministpig, Thu 29 Jan 2004, 14:30, Reply)

My penny jar
makes me feel ill. I've had it years now and can't bear to count it out.
And my mate gets seriously freaked out by the holes in crumpets.
(stickybellyflapcock, Thu 29 Jan 2004, 14:29, Reply)

Paper
Oh and....my cousin is scared of little bits of paper, particularly bits of paper that have been torn into small pieces. They make her freak out.
(Peachykeen, Thu 29 Jan 2004, 14:21, Reply)