I killed my chances and I blame B3ta
A few years ago, I was travelling home to Ireland from Sunny Liverpool (Where I was at Uni) for Christmas. Now, when I say "Sunny" Liverpool, what I really meant was "Cold, wet, foggy and bitterly cold with occasional snow"-y Liverpool. It was particularly bad this year and it caused all sorts of grief with the airlines and more importantly, my flight.

To save a long story, after a cancellation and several delays, the budget airline we were using decided it'd be best to ship us off to another airport, in Newcastle, to get a different flight the next day. So on the coach we got and I ended up sat right near the back with a group of people who seemed rather familiar with each other. They'd never met before that day, but after spending several hours cramped inside an airport terminal they got to know each other very well. This group was made up of about 3 girls for every guy and make no mistake, there was all sorts of flirting and shenanigans going on. Coupled with the fact that we were all getting a free hotel room for the night and you can imagine where this was heading. There was plenty of flirting, rude jokes and general excitement going on.

Imagine my surprise, then, when I start getting roped into the conversation. It seems that many of the girls were jealous and upset that their friends had paired off with someone else and didn't want to be the only ones not sharing a bed that night/morning. I thought my luck was in, good shag with some out of town strange would make up for the fact that I'd somehow spent 2 days "travelling" and yet didn't go anywhere. I even had a choice! There was at least 3 or 4 girls basically begging for it! It really was Christmas!

Then the conversation turned to what everyone did for a living, or rather what everyone was studying at uni since we were all about that age. "I'm a PE teacher!" says one. "I'm a barrister!" says another.

"I'm a rapist!" says I.

Everyone stops. Everyone. The coach goes completely silent, bar the engine and the occasional cough. Eventually, I was politely asked to move to a seat half way down the coach so that one of the girls could "Sit beside her friend".

To this day, I have no idea why I said it - I guess I could argue that I thought it'd be funny and on /talk, it might have been. But not the real world, with real "normal" people in it. Balls.
(Kushan just wants to fit in..to your mum, Thu 22 Dec 2011, 15:01, 7 replies)

Haha!
*click*

You should of done a Warick Davies (lifes to short) and said, no I said racist, you may have been lucky and shacked up with a daily mail reader
(bROKEN aRROW PUA HVI Master, Thu 22 Dec 2011, 15:06, closed)

Erm ... yes ...
Maybe that is the case ...

The fact that you are so able to easily confuse the two is equally disturbing.
( Je suis un vagabond is an unfunny, up your own arse middle class knob, Thu 22 Dec 2011, 15:19, closed)

How many did you rape?

(TheColonel, Thu 22 Dec 2011, 17:47, closed)

Ha ha!

( monster munch person, man, woman... camera... TV?, Thu 22 Dec 2011, 19:20, closed)

Nah, you'd probably have got called a prick on /talk and then told to fuck off.

( BraynDedd Natasha Kaplinsky's labia majora, Fri 23 Dec 2011, 18:05, closed)

And then cried about it on here.

( Amorous Badger NAKED BEA ARTHUR PHOTOS 4U, Mon 26 Dec 2011, 16:57, closed)

Train of thought
I can see how "PE Teacher" and "barrister" could lead on to you shouting "rapist". Would have been even better if someone had said "RC priest" before your turn.
(Classic Ray, Fri 23 Dec 2011, 22:44, closed)