Not Losing Your VirginityThink back, way back, to when you were a spotty virgin.* It was all a bit overwhelming, wasn't it? I remember going to see a band as a teenager and standing behind a girl who I kinda liked, but who had been showing a lot of interest in a friend for the past week. She reached back and squeezed my leg.
I panicked. Brain decided that she'd clearly made a mistake and thought I was my friend: "Er, you've got the wrong bloke"
It was hours before I worked out what was going on.
So, tell us the stories of when you failed to lose your virginity - whether through your own ineptitude or simply because they scared the bejesus out of you.
* Apologies to spotty virgins out there. Wash.
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chthonic, Fri 27 Oct 2006, 12:13)
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EmmaI was quiet when I was young. Not shy, but just didn't see the point of saying anything if I didn't have anything worthwhile to say. This is a terrible problem when trying to chat up girls, especially when attempting to talk to Emma for the first time. She had long, blond hair, big blue eyes and a fantastic body (even though we were both about 10 years old, she still had a perfect figure). So we devised a plan, 'we' being myself, Greg, Steve and Brian: I'd phone her up and ask her if she'd like to go and watch a film with me. The four of us set up an amazingly elaborate script which covered all eventualities; every conceivable twist in the conversation was covered - no matter what Emma said, we were confident we'd have a pre-prepared answer. The time came to make the call. I had the several sheets of A4, Greg, Steve and Brian were listening on the extension so that they could hear how things went and could point to the relevant part of the script if I lost control of things, and the most nerve-wracking call of my life began.....
Me: Hi Emma
Emma: Hi Jerry. How're you
Me: Fine thanks. Just wondered if you'd like to go see a film on Friday
Emma: Sure. Shall I come over to your place for about seven o'clock?
Me: That sounds good. See you on Friday.
Emma: Bye
I'm so astounded at how easy it all was that I'm stunned into silence. A silence which is filled by Greg, et al yelling things down the extension like, "You've nailed her", "You're gonna have your hands inside her knickers within a minute" and "She's gonna be sucking you like a whore" together with other unsavoury comments.
Emma: I'm still here you know. I'm never going to speak to you ever again.
And she didn't.
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Fr_Jerry_McGwier looked over both shoulders at, Sun 29 Oct 2006, 17:15,
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