O2 are such mongols.
My phone broke two months ago, whilst still under warranty. The replacement phone is playing up so I rang them this morning, only to be told that the warranty had expired. The dozy northern bint tried to tell me that the remaining one month of warranty from my previous handset was all I got on the new one.

Needless to say I abused her and passed her amongst my Muslim brothers in the greater Manchester area until she capitulated.
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Wed 9 May 2012, 11:29, 6 replies, latest was 12 years ago)

copy and paste some legal sounding stuff off the internet into a email
it means you skip past the "meat shield" of retards on the front line and deal with someone who actualy knows (sort of) what they're doing.
(PsychoChomp, Wed 9 May 2012, 11:32, Reply)

he should get rachelswipe to write something up on her shotgun bastard & dribble headed paper

(Quintno EXPERIMENT RUINED CANCELLED, LEFT 4EVER, Wed 9 May 2012, 11:33, Reply)

No need.
I am now getting a brand new handset tomorrow (with another year's warranty), and the same monthly package for less, due to my FEARSOME TELEPHONE BULLYING*

*phrases such as 'ARE YOU SERIOUSALY TRYING TO TELL ME' and 'IN MY TWELVE YEARS AS A CUSTOMER OF YOURS I HAVE NEVER HEARD OF SUCH A RIDICULOUS' were employed
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Wed 9 May 2012, 11:34, Reply)

+ 'I KNOW WHERE YOU LIVE' and 'I AM GOING TO RAPE YOU UNLESS YOU GIVE ME A NEW PHONE'

( Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Wed 9 May 2012, 11:39, Reply)

'I HAVE YOUR KIDS HOSTAGE'

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Wed 9 May 2012, 11:44, Reply)

+ BECAUSE I CAN'T HAVE MY OWN

( b3th Not shit. Not mod., Wed 9 May 2012, 11:47, Reply)

*stern face*
Now steady on.
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Wed 9 May 2012, 11:50, Reply)

bender x

( b3th Not shit. Not mod., Wed 9 May 2012, 11:56, Reply)

Ouch!

(Reverend Fister "a disciplined fuckwit", Wed 9 May 2012, 11:53, Reply)

I've just been forwarded a customer complaint,
from a customer who has BEEN MEASURED BY MENSA TO HAVE AN IQ OF 155!!!
and who is also BRITISH TO THE BONE!!!
( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Wed 9 May 2012, 11:41, Reply)

Well I hope that now you will take my complaint seriously, Narinder.

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Wed 9 May 2012, 11:44, Reply)

nothing to boast of
I got either 156 or 165 on one of their poxy tests and I'm not exactly a fucking genius.
( CQ Knows the truth, all of it., Wed 9 May 2012, 11:46, Reply)

Never a truer word said.

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Wed 9 May 2012, 11:47, Reply)

Did it also test for dyscalculia?

( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Wed 9 May 2012, 11:50, Reply)

Oh v good

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Wed 9 May 2012, 11:50, Reply)

Silly tangles
CQ is not a vampire
( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Wed 9 May 2012, 11:51, Reply)

Cool story.

( Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Wed 9 May 2012, 11:32, Reply)

Putting your phone onto 'vibrate'
then shoving it up your fetid dirtbox may have invalidated your warranty.

Just saying.
(Reverend Fister "a disciplined fuckwit", Wed 9 May 2012, 11:34, Reply)

Yes but I used to be married to Cheryl Cole - surely that counts for something?

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Wed 9 May 2012, 11:49, Reply)

Cheryl Curl

( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Wed 9 May 2012, 11:54, Reply)

Yes it does
You are black, well past your best and trying (and failing) to keep yourself in the closet.

Sorry to be the bearer, etc..
(Reverend Fister "a disciplined fuckwit", Wed 9 May 2012, 12:00, Reply)

He is the best left back in the world, Ashally

( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Wed 9 May 2012, 12:04, Reply)

Oh you should listen to todays womans hour on the iPlayer
primarily because you're a girl, but also because there was a discussion about kids and access and shit like that.
(PsychoChomp, Wed 9 May 2012, 11:34, Reply)

Ah I see.
Shame I missed it.
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Wed 9 May 2012, 11:35, Reply)

Though she is technically correct
You can still get them on the rules about reasonable expectation of lifespan. Our washing machine died after 14 months and they said sorry tough shit and we pointed out that 14 months for an £800 washing machine was not what a reasonable person would expect from the appliance and quoted the Consumer Guarantees Act at them. We got a new one free of charge.
( Peej, Wed 9 May 2012, 11:35, Reply)

Your mum is technically correct.

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Wed 9 May 2012, 11:40, Reply)

Just not anatomically, as I'm sure she shouldn't be able to trip over her own tits.

( Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Wed 9 May 2012, 11:41, Reply)

Bitch be tit tripping

( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Wed 9 May 2012, 11:42, Reply)

This post almost gets you off the 'converstation' one earlier.

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Wed 9 May 2012, 11:47, Reply)

My mum is younger than half of the old cunt on OT
No tit trippin for her yet
( Peej, Wed 9 May 2012, 11:44, Reply)

Vodafone don't have visual voicemail on the iphone, according to their forms, they've been trying to do it for 4 years.
When I asked them about it, he said their enginers are working on it _now_ and it'll be 'released soon'... pretty much the exact thing their forum post from 2009 said.

I thought vodafone was all about business, I'm buying out my contract and moving back to O2 when my contract is done.
( G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩&#128, Wed 9 May 2012, 12:07, Reply)