i love hallowe'en
i go all-out with the decorations and, the last few years, i've been dressing myself up in ever scarier costumes.
last year, i dressed as a zombie, with full make-up, fake blood everywhere and a fake bite mark. i rigged the front door with fishing line so i could open it from the living room and let whoever was outside see me come shambling and moaning down the hall, with a bowl of sweets clasped loosely in my gore-streaked hands. i was really pleased with how good it all looked.
i was even more pleased - and more than a little proud - that my costume actually made 3 kids cry that night. going to see if i can top that this year.
( Smash Monkey lowering the tone of the whole internet, Fri 17 Oct 2014, 15:25, 13 replies)

You could show them your arsehole.
That'd make anyone cry.
(eViLegion Chief Commissioner of the Scottish Lunacy Board, Fri 17 Oct 2014, 15:38, closed)

biohazard tattoos make everyone cry?
i'll have to remember that.
( Smash Monkey lowering the tone of the whole internet, Fri 17 Oct 2014, 15:47, closed)

If you want to make little kids cry,
it'd be easier to just punch them in the face as they walk home from school.
( monster munch person, man, woman... camera... TV?, Fri 17 Oct 2014, 16:15, closed)

i could get into trouble for that

( Smash Monkey lowering the tone of the whole internet, Fri 17 Oct 2014, 16:21, closed)

If you want to top last year's efforts in terms of sheer kid-scaring ability,
get yourself a Jimmy Savile costume.
( .Yeti. El amor en los tiempos del cólera, Fri 17 Oct 2014, 16:19, closed)

now then

( Smash Monkey lowering the tone of the whole internet, Sat 18 Oct 2014, 14:54, closed)

I make three kids cry every night.
And I don't even wear anything.
( edjogs Collared doves are shit., Fri 17 Oct 2014, 16:38, closed)

You really should use protection, you don't know WHERE they've been

( drimble he'd been white, he'd been black, Fri 17 Oct 2014, 19:20, closed)

the spacing here is srsly inappropriate... or is it?
"i rigged the front door with fishing line so i could open it from the living room and let whoever was outside see me come
shambling and moaning down the hall"
( rachelswipe with a fork, Fri 17 Oct 2014, 16:48, closed)

The living room and the hall are one and the same.
It's the only rational explanation.
(Plague Hedgehog 'posting crap', Fri 17 Oct 2014, 16:53, closed)

pfff
didn't even spot that!
( Smash Monkey lowering the tone of the whole internet, Sat 18 Oct 2014, 14:53, closed)

The fact you wanted the kids to see you coming has probably earned you
six months on a secure wing.
(zebideedoodah likes florence but prefers venice, Fri 17 Oct 2014, 21:27, closed)

but i don't even like flying!

( Smash Monkey lowering the tone of the whole internet, Sat 18 Oct 2014, 14:54, closed)