B3taday pea roast and cake all round

Every year we have an Channel Island interinsular football tournament with Jersey and Guernsey habitually meeting in the final. The year in question the final was held in Guernsey. Along with a small but passionate group of supporters and my then six year old we make the short trip o'er the water to the game. Our seats in the 'stadium' (read: field with some chairs) were right alongside the most rabid home supporters. As passions rose so did terrace chants and, well, abuse.

As I pray that my lad doesn't pick up and repeat any of the amusingly colourful ditties, especially to Mrs Number 5, he starts to join in with some of my fellow supporters' witty slur "you fat bastard" aimed at the largest and most mentally unstable skinhead in the Guernsey end. His crystal clear scream of "YOU FAT PASTA" manages to stun an entire end of some three to four hundred fans into silence. I didn't have the heart to either correct him or rebuke him for his hooligan tendencies.
( number5 has been fighting tramps and losing., Sat 21 Apr 2012, 14:02, 2 replies)

Nothing quite like a Muratti to get the blood boiling.
*throws carrot on pitch*
( Hunter Stockton was murdered by a bicycle wielding axolotl,.,.,.,., Sun 22 Apr 2012, 0:56, closed)

You'll find yourself in a cell with that sort of hooligan behaviour.
Or so I was told by WPC many moons ago after chucking some root vegetables on for the Sarnian left back to munch on.
( number5 has been fighting tramps and losing., Sun 22 Apr 2012, 15:12, closed)