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This is a question Terrible food

Back when I was a student, we had a "clear out the fridge" party. Everyone brought what they had left and the idea was to make a big meal out of it.

The stew/casserole/whatever was going surprisingly well until someone added the tin of mackerel in tomato sauce they'd been hoarding all year.

What's the worst thing you've ever cooked or eaten? Who's the worst cook you've encountered?

[and yes, we've asked this before, but way, way back before we had the fancy QOTW pages]

(, Thu 17 May 2007, 10:23)
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You asked for it sir
In a restaurant in Lido Di Jesolo, a few years ago. Last day of holiday and we'd pretty much exhausted all types/flavours of Pizza on every menu in the whole of northern Italy. Leigh decides he wants them to make a pizza up that is not on the menu. He asks for a seafood pizza. When it arrived, my margherita looked like a wonderful choice. His pizza looked like they'd chucked a net in the sea and just emptied the contents of it onto a 30" diameter tomato puree basted loaf of bread!
Amongst other fishy delights it contained 2 giant prawns (heads included), muscles (in shells), two crispy baby octopuses and what looked like an eel!!! Absolutely everything on this pizza needed something doing to it by hand before eating, (peeling, beheading etc) added to the fact that everything that was inedible on the pizza was covered in tomato puree it was a complete waste of time, he ended up in a right mess.

Of course, he said that this was exactly what he was expecting and that he was going to enjoy it. He cut one of the baby octopuses in half and I tried it (I got the tenticle half). That was the most disgusting thing I have ever tasted in my life.

Credit to Leigh, he ate it though (although it may have had something to do with the fact that the chef was stood watching him eat it, with a giant machete in hand whilst probably thinking 'silly eeeenglish twat, I'll teach him to ask for a silly pizza').

He admitted later that 'all he wanted was a few fucking prawns'. Quite amusing at the time but I suppose you had to be there!

Click 'I like this' to give those little baby octopusses deaths some kind of meaning. To be in b3ta's 'best' section of QOTW was all that the little buggers wanted from life.
(, Mon 21 May 2007, 14:07, Reply)

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