...


More here
(Mon 21st Feb 2005, 0:00, More)

evolution of the "sunday man"

CFB
(Wed 5th Jan 2005, 8:56, More)

» Well, that taught 'em

college days.....
Let me start at the beginning - when i was at school - because i was a tall stocky kid i was always the first to get shit - people liked to try and get me into fights - now i'm not saying i cant stand up for myself - but i just don't see the point in beating people to within an inch of their lives....!

anyway there was this one kid at school lets call him nick (as thats his name :o) ) he was a short little runt of a twunt who always tried to wind me up. for years on and off i had him being a dick to me.

any fast forward a few years and i'm starting my second year at college - and low and behold little nicky dickless turns up at college - still being a twunt still trying to wind me up.

anyway luckly we drift in different circles - he eventually gets bored of being a dick to me - or he finds a new victim. yay for me.

then one day i'm in the college computer room working on a some crap dos stuff (yep DOS Baby) and i notice this nick leaving his computer with floppy disk still in the machine, i quickly wrote a quick dos batch file to delete his files when he did a directory search (you see in dos if you have a file locally stored with the same name as a program file - it will run the local one.

i pop the disk back in the machine and carry on working. a few mins later - in pops nick and starts to work. he then starts screaming at the computer and hitting the keyboard - it still makes me smile to this day :o)

Why didnt i just format the disk - well i'm not that much of a bastard - so i wanted to give him a sporting chance :o)
(Fri 27th Apr 2007, 11:42, More)

» School fights

i once got hit
by a girl with and umbrella because i wouldnt let her cut in to some queue i was in! so i calmly took it of her and bent it in half. she wasnt best pleased! although it made my day. :o)
(Mon 13th Mar 2006, 20:49, More)

» I don't understand the attraction

clubs
i f**king hate clubs! they are loud, there is no space, you cant smoke a pipe, no house slippers allowed, and what are these girls wearing - i wear more than that in the shower! :D

but seriously - i hate clubs - never got on with them at uni - dont think i ever will! :D
(Thu 15th Oct 2009, 16:02, More)

» Missing body parts

i'm slowly falling apart
i lost a lump of abnormal bone that grew out of my left leg. i also had my tonsils removed, the fact i had a plant growing on one of them was a bit shocking.

I also lost a bit of my skull after someone threw a brick out of a tree at me. :o)
(Fri 2nd Jun 2006, 8:21, More)

» Have you ever been rude to a celebrity?

i once heared terry prattchet tell a small kid to fuck off!
i know its not quite right for the question - but - i was at a book signing and this little kid walked up to old TP and asked him how much his pen was. being the missreble old git he is he told him to fuck off, then told me he went to the Acme school of etiquette.

on a different not i'm always rude to my mate matt, who was a minor celebrity at home - he one a load of wheelchair races. we nick-named the local paper the matt mag as it always had his face in it somewhere.
(Wed 14th Apr 2004, 21:13, More)