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» When were you last really scared?
Anaphylactic shock
Longtime lurker etc.
Mate of mine is a lovely girl but very sensitive to nuts, eggs and lots of other food. At her engagement party she gets wasted and decided to have some cake covered in marzipan. Marzipan=almonds=her starting to choke in the car on the way home. We're caning down some country lanes with her fella mashing the pedal to the floor, assuring me that they've got an adrenaline pen back at their place.
We get there and it suddenly comes to light that the flat keys are back at the party place. We call an ambulance, her fella asks me for my least valuable credit card and sets about breaking into the flat while I try and keep her conscious. I'm on my own on the phone to the 999 people, trying my best when suddenly she makes a nasty noise and fucking stops breathing.
I shout up to my mate, try and drag her out of the car, he comes belting down and tries to do CPR (which doesn't work because her throat's swollen shut), I'm screaming down the phone at the 999 people and go racing off to find the ambulance two streets away, while he half-drags her and smashes his way into the flat to try and get the adrenaline. The ambulance finally gets its act together, sticks her full of needles and things and stabilises her before getting her off to hospital. She discharged herself the following day and has been a damn sight more careful what she eats since. Plus she keeps an adrenaline pen in her frickin handbag instead of under the bed.
Scared? I fucking shit myself.
Length? girth? never mind that, what about the nuts
(Thu 22nd Feb 2007, 22:54, More)
Anaphylactic shock
Longtime lurker etc.
Mate of mine is a lovely girl but very sensitive to nuts, eggs and lots of other food. At her engagement party she gets wasted and decided to have some cake covered in marzipan. Marzipan=almonds=her starting to choke in the car on the way home. We're caning down some country lanes with her fella mashing the pedal to the floor, assuring me that they've got an adrenaline pen back at their place.
We get there and it suddenly comes to light that the flat keys are back at the party place. We call an ambulance, her fella asks me for my least valuable credit card and sets about breaking into the flat while I try and keep her conscious. I'm on my own on the phone to the 999 people, trying my best when suddenly she makes a nasty noise and fucking stops breathing.
I shout up to my mate, try and drag her out of the car, he comes belting down and tries to do CPR (which doesn't work because her throat's swollen shut), I'm screaming down the phone at the 999 people and go racing off to find the ambulance two streets away, while he half-drags her and smashes his way into the flat to try and get the adrenaline. The ambulance finally gets its act together, sticks her full of needles and things and stabilises her before getting her off to hospital. She discharged herself the following day and has been a damn sight more careful what she eats since. Plus she keeps an adrenaline pen in her frickin handbag instead of under the bed.
Scared? I fucking shit myself.
Length? girth? never mind that, what about the nuts
(Thu 22nd Feb 2007, 22:54, More)
» Foot in Mouth Syndrome
the dangers of piracy
At a friend's flat a few months ago I picked up an unusual looking copy of Lord of the Rings: The Two Towers, only to find it was a pirated version with Oriental blurb on the back. "Why have you got the lik tang fuk wang ding version?" I asked, only to experience a deathly silence by way of reply - his (Oriental) new girlfriend had just walked in. Ulp.
(Wed 21st Apr 2004, 16:29, More)
the dangers of piracy
At a friend's flat a few months ago I picked up an unusual looking copy of Lord of the Rings: The Two Towers, only to find it was a pirated version with Oriental blurb on the back. "Why have you got the lik tang fuk wang ding version?" I asked, only to experience a deathly silence by way of reply - his (Oriental) new girlfriend had just walked in. Ulp.
(Wed 21st Apr 2004, 16:29, More)