» Office Christmas Parties

SCUM
Last Friday my small 3-man department had a Xmas piss-up in the local pub with our £105. £35 each what our law firm give us.
Our fat pikey sh*tbag woman- repelling "Team Leader" decides that he wants to take his money home. Pikey. After several lines of Peruvian marching powder we confronted him and made him put the remainder of his wong in the whipjar and Fckoff off home to his slag missus.
That'll teach him to fart when I'm eating.
BAH HUMBUG!
(Fri 17th Dec 2004, 17:52, More)

» I was drunk when I bought this

drunken eBay
just t'other week I had some drinks at lunch, returned to my desk then thought I'd buy a mini Fosters fridge for 15quid. Pissed up again the next afternoon, I receive an email from the seller about a 7ft Fosters beer vender (complete with beer) for £1500 quid. Gutted was I.
(Mon 13th Jun 2005, 11:16, More)

» Office Christmas Parties

The same Friday...
when I abused the team leader. Fat C NT.

In walks our boss, Buys me a bottle of champagne and lets me suckle her left bell when we cross paths in the toilet area.
Result!
Hopefully I can poke her and her daughter for Xmas.
(Sat 18th Dec 2004, 12:09, More)

» Your Weirdest Teacher

Mr Mulcahy
An East End loudmouth type who (when any swear words were hurled in his direction) used to say things like... "Bishop, I fucked your mother last night", "I wouldn't eat that packed lunch coz I spunked into it last night" etc...
(Wed 16th Nov 2005, 18:03, More)

» Pretentious bollocks

Tate Modern Toss
They had a big fucking semi-circle hollow tube (http://img201.imageshack.us/img201/5651/marsyas023ct.jpg) in the exhibition hall once. My mate threw a tennis ball through it & as we waited patiently for it to drop at the other end a security guard collared said mate and slung him out. Pretentious cunt AND art.
(Mon 3rd Oct 2005, 16:24, More)