b3ta.com user LaughingJack
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» Near Death Experiences

Lorries are scary now.....
I was living and working in the UK in 2001. Bought myself a bicycle to cycle to work and back. On my way home one sunny Friday afternoon, I was on my bike on a foot path and wanted to cross the road. There was an arctic lorry on my right hand side and as I started to cross the road, the lorry started to turn left. Towards me. First thing that went through my mind was.... That's IT! I'm DEAD. I tried to get out of the way but it just kept on coming. The left front wheel went over my right leg, bum and part of my back. Somehow I got freed up and ran away only to go sit down on the pavement in complete amazement that I’m still alive. Had to get 2 screws put into my hip. Spent 3 months on crutches nursing a broken pelvis and I still have to undergo a reconstruction operation to attach the muscles in my bum to the right place. Afterwards the doctor said that if the wheel went over me 1 inch further, my liver, testicles and lung would have been crushed, killing me instantly…. Close, so close.
(Wed 1st Dec 2004, 7:23, More)

» Lost...

Uhhhh....
Of all the things i've lost, i miss my mind the most.
(Mon 6th Dec 2004, 12:30, More)

» My Worst Vomit

KFC
Went to visit a friend in Cape Town and went to a pub for a few beers, got hungry so decided to have some KFC. On the way there, our appetites weren’t big enough so decided to have a joint... Got the KFC and sat down in store to have our meals. I started eating my chicken which contained enough oil for the whole of the US supply and felt queasy. Said to my mate, this stuff's going to make me and.... BAARF. Puked all over the counter, myself and my mate (who was very unimpressed). Left store in a hurry got myself cleaned and walked pass for a second look... Shop closed due to....
(Tue 24th Aug 2004, 12:13, More)