b3ta.com user The-paranoid-android
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» Stupid Tourists

Another American
Whilst at the zoo, I overheard an American woman, who after sitting on a wet bench, shouted out "Gee, I just wet ma Fanny."

The horny Bitch.
(Fri 8th Jul 2005, 16:07, More)

» Stupid Tourists

Bloody Americans
I was strolling merrily through Bath, when a young american tourist comes up to me and says "Watch out for that pigeon, dude, it has a real narly attitude." Bemused, I respond by saying "Yeah, you want to look out for those bloody pigeons." The yanks immediatley start laughing and doing fake mocking english accents. I fail to see how they can talk, they were from the south (and probably inbred.)
(Thu 7th Jul 2005, 19:15, More)

» Stupid Tourists

My good friend, Davemund, was in America...
And he went to some, God awful, magic show. The "Magician" called him out to the stage and told him to say an item of clothing to the magician's dog. Davemund says "Trousers."

The dumb mutt came back with a bra...

He said he got a lot of funny looks.
(Wed 13th Jul 2005, 16:13, More)

» Stupid Tourists

In France...
Me and my family befriended a Scottish family. The Scottish husband, hungry, proceeds to go up to a food stall, failing to notice it closing down for the day and says (while pointing at the menu) "I'll have that, that and that" to which the French woman behind the stall replies "Non, non et non." The Scottish husband, peeved off, flips her the bird and says "well, you can fuck off you fucking froggy bitch." My Grandma, shocked, proceeds to walk away and trips over a small yorkshire terrier. Quite ironic, considering the fact that she's from Yorkshire.
(Fri 8th Jul 2005, 17:07, More)