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» Useless advice
.
"If it has tits or an engine it will be trouble."
(Thu 19th Oct 2006, 16:05, More)
.
"If it has tits or an engine it will be trouble."
(Thu 19th Oct 2006, 16:05, More)
» Unexpected Good Fortune
How about this for luck
Unexpected good fortune?
Well I was born into quite a rich family. Well I say quite rich, I mean absolutely stinking rich, and then it turned out I was heir to the throne. And I don't have to have number plates so I can go down all the bus lanes and through red lights and that, and no-one can fucking touch me.
And I've met Rolf Harris.
(Fri 15th Sep 2006, 15:12, More)
How about this for luck
Unexpected good fortune?
Well I was born into quite a rich family. Well I say quite rich, I mean absolutely stinking rich, and then it turned out I was heir to the throne. And I don't have to have number plates so I can go down all the bus lanes and through red lights and that, and no-one can fucking touch me.
And I've met Rolf Harris.
(Fri 15th Sep 2006, 15:12, More)
» Guilty Secrets
A bit of a to-do
My eldest son was having a bit of trouble from his ex-wife. You know the sort: convinces everyone butter wouldn't melt whilst shagging everything in trousers and sticking the knife in big style.
So anyway, while she was away on holiday I had her killed in a very convincing car accident.
Anyone want to buy a dented white Fiat Uno?
(Mon 3rd Sep 2007, 23:58, More)
A bit of a to-do
My eldest son was having a bit of trouble from his ex-wife. You know the sort: convinces everyone butter wouldn't melt whilst shagging everything in trousers and sticking the knife in big style.
So anyway, while she was away on holiday I had her killed in a very convincing car accident.
Anyone want to buy a dented white Fiat Uno?
(Mon 3rd Sep 2007, 23:58, More)
» Debt pron
Look, it's quite simple...
4 words:
"Live within your means."
Then you won't get into so much debt. Britain is heading for a financial crisis because Labour's economy is based entirely on consumer debt, and nothing is being ploughed back into the economy in the shape of investment.
When the bubble bursts, and it will given that interest rates, unemployment and inflation are all rising at the same time, and fast, all you lot who owe thousands are *really* going to be screwed.
The thing is, it's not hard to live a relatively debt-free life. Here's a few blindingly obvious guidelines for you all.
1. Do not spend more than you earn. Ever.
2. Never borrow more than you can afford to pay back, should it all go tits up.
3. If you want something expensive, *save up for it*
4. Get one credit card only. Pay it off in full every month. Only use it for the purchase protection benefits, and don't spend more on it each month than you can afford to clear.
5. Don't buy a new car. If you do you are an idiot. It loses more than half its value in 2 years. Let some other mug suffer that loss and buy a car at least 2 years old.
6. You do not need a huge flat screen TV. Your CRT recieves and displays television perfectly well. You do not need a PS3 or an XBOX 360. You don't need a new mobile phone. Technology never gets more expensive, and early adopters pay well over the odds compared with those who waited a year or two.
7. If you live in London, buy a motorbike or scooter and commute on it instead of using public transport. It will cost you less each year to own than one month's travel card. If you are close enough to work then walk or cycle. It will cost you almost nothing.
8. Put as much money as possible into paying off your debt each month.
9. For those with student loans, even if you could defer payments, don't. Start paying it off as soon as you get a job. It might be index linked and basically free credit, but the company fuck things up on a staggeringly regular basis and will royally shaft you for their mistakes. Avoid the hassle and sudden shock of having to pay them 2 year's payments on one day by not deferring.
10. Buy property. Get a mortgage and buy somewhere. And if you only need a 1 bedroom flat, only buy a 1 bedroom flat. If you rent you'll pay dead money and landlords steal from and con their tenants all the time. Get a mortgage and within a year your home will be worth more than you owe the bank.
(Fri 24th Nov 2006, 14:30, More)
Look, it's quite simple...
4 words:
"Live within your means."
Then you won't get into so much debt. Britain is heading for a financial crisis because Labour's economy is based entirely on consumer debt, and nothing is being ploughed back into the economy in the shape of investment.
When the bubble bursts, and it will given that interest rates, unemployment and inflation are all rising at the same time, and fast, all you lot who owe thousands are *really* going to be screwed.
The thing is, it's not hard to live a relatively debt-free life. Here's a few blindingly obvious guidelines for you all.
1. Do not spend more than you earn. Ever.
2. Never borrow more than you can afford to pay back, should it all go tits up.
3. If you want something expensive, *save up for it*
4. Get one credit card only. Pay it off in full every month. Only use it for the purchase protection benefits, and don't spend more on it each month than you can afford to clear.
5. Don't buy a new car. If you do you are an idiot. It loses more than half its value in 2 years. Let some other mug suffer that loss and buy a car at least 2 years old.
6. You do not need a huge flat screen TV. Your CRT recieves and displays television perfectly well. You do not need a PS3 or an XBOX 360. You don't need a new mobile phone. Technology never gets more expensive, and early adopters pay well over the odds compared with those who waited a year or two.
7. If you live in London, buy a motorbike or scooter and commute on it instead of using public transport. It will cost you less each year to own than one month's travel card. If you are close enough to work then walk or cycle. It will cost you almost nothing.
8. Put as much money as possible into paying off your debt each month.
9. For those with student loans, even if you could defer payments, don't. Start paying it off as soon as you get a job. It might be index linked and basically free credit, but the company fuck things up on a staggeringly regular basis and will royally shaft you for their mistakes. Avoid the hassle and sudden shock of having to pay them 2 year's payments on one day by not deferring.
10. Buy property. Get a mortgage and buy somewhere. And if you only need a 1 bedroom flat, only buy a 1 bedroom flat. If you rent you'll pay dead money and landlords steal from and con their tenants all the time. Get a mortgage and within a year your home will be worth more than you owe the bank.
(Fri 24th Nov 2006, 14:30, More)