» Will you go out with me?

For some reason,
I always seem to ask out girls that do some form of drama or performing arts.
Then wonder why i never noticed they were going to fuck me over.

Last one took me on holiday with her family, brought me home, then never made an effort to speak to me again.

I even pulled her out of the sea with elite baywatch sexyness one particularly rough day.

For fucks sake.
(Thu 28th Aug 2008, 21:05, More)

» Blood

Boundry
When i was about 12, i loved cricket.
The anticipation on which way the batter was going to knock it, the swing that the clever arse kids could get on the ball, the knowledge your manhood is protected by a measley piece of plastic...

Then i decided to play it.
First game, i got through batting fine. Hardly knocked out a boundry or anything, but played some time and lasted a decent amount of runs.

Fielding on the other hand...

"Andy - thats your catch"
-Cue back peddaling

*THWACK.

The ball goes straight through my hands, and into my right eye. Seems i wasn't that good a catch after all.

I'm knocked to the floor.
Get up, lob the ball back to the bowler, announce i'm fine. Feel a bit dazed, eyes a bit numb.....

"Oh, shit, wait, why is my eye closing???"
People run at me with cold cloths, a frozen bottle of something that is wrapped and put on my eye etc.
I fall asleep in the car, am seen at A&E in half hour, recover with a dented cheek bone.

But the first day back at school was amazing. As it only happend two days previously, i had a shiner so fucking huge it looked like the ball was still stuck under my eye!

The guys thought it was fantastic - another good war wound to show off. But the girls... Until this day i have never seen a girl scream and be so afraid of an injury!
Yeah, ok, it looked damn sick, but i hardly had a third arm growing out of my face...
(Sat 9th Aug 2008, 21:17, More)