Dick and Qwerty and full of toap
New permanent BBC logo for Trump
(compo'd because it's a logo)


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(Tue 31st Jan 2017, 11:19, More)

» Conspicuous Consumption

Picture the scene..
Belfast Castle, I'm sitting in a velvet high backed chair beside a big roaring log fire in a wood panelled room watching the snow fall outside sipping a pint. Absolute bliss.

Back to reality and I'm only there as we are waiting to start a gig in the ballroom. I'm dressed in jeans and a t-shirt but for a few moments in my mind I was king of that castle.
(Fri 29th Jul 2011, 2:11, More)

» Worst Band Ever

Anything and everything that uses Autotune
Don't get me wrong, I live, eat, sleep and breath electronic music but sometimes technological inventions exist that should have been unplugged at the ideas stage.
(Fri 31st Dec 2010, 2:12, More)

» Cars

On the subject of Cars by Mr Numan
I used to press the central locking button in my car every time the line "I can lock all my doors" was sung.

sad but true.
(Fri 23rd Apr 2010, 20:28, More)

» Nights Out Gone Wrong

It started out ok
Myself and two mates decided a trip to the local boozer(s) for a traditional pub crawl before heading off to a nightclub was in order.

We sat in the front bar of a local hotel and then a gypsy wedding party arrived. Or to be precise, 2 couples that had just been thrown out of the pub next door that was holding the wedding.

After listening to them fighting for a few minutes and then starting to annoy the lone barmaid we decided to ask then politely to behave themselves, informing them that we were hotel staff and that they were perfectly entitled to stay if they behaved. (not quite the truth as only one of us was)

all was well for a few more minutes until one of them simply stood up, and proceeded to punch one of the others without so much as a bad word. We then rather briskly escorted them from the building and sent them on their way.

15 minutes later we heard the sirens. We then discovered one of the party (the one who had been punched) took out a 10 inch Bowie knife from his jacket and stabbed the other guy through the heart and walked away as if nothing happened.

To this day it still bugs us as to how we missed the knife, and why the guy did not do the same to one of us when we put them out. 3 hours filling in witness statements instead of getting pissed.
(Fri 25th Mar 2011, 2:00, More)

» Cars

Porsche gets nicked by cops in a skoda
that subject line these days would not make the back pages, but back in 1982 that was something. My mates uncle owned a Porsche 911 Turbo - in flame red and a big black spoiler, sort of stood out a bit. Anyway we were on our way to work when he flew past us, "there goes uncle" says my mate. Next I saw this Skoda Estelle in my mirror - usual Skoda jokes started until that is I spotted not only the blue flashing light in his window but the fact he too was passing us at great speed. a mile up the road there was the Porsche at the side of the road with the Skoda behind it, it's driver casually writing out a speeding ticket.
(Thu 22nd Apr 2010, 19:20, More)