» Your Revenge Stories

Ex girlfriend.
Complete sponger, she lived with me for three years, and four of those months were *after* we broke up. She never paid for anything, ate all my food, put a lock on my bedroom door etc.

So I had my new girlfriend round as often as possible, and we used to shag everywhere. Even started going at it on the sofa while the ex was there watching TV.

Then, when she was finally ready to leave, I wiped my arse with her toothbrush, pissed in her mug, and sewed up a dead rabbit inside her favourite stuffed toy.
(Fri 14th May 2004, 12:56, More)

» Have you ever been rude to a celebrity?

Laurence Llewelyn Bowen
A good friend of mine called Llewelyn Bowen a "Fucking muppet" because he stood on her foot.

That's all.
(Thu 15th Apr 2004, 9:03, More)

» Have you ever been rude to a celebrity?

Just remembered
Our team here at work went on a residential training course in some posh hotel near Plymouth. The new Warner Village complex had it's grand opening the day before, so as we were arriving Jonathan Ross and Caprice were leaving.

That night, beered up, I started chatting to some people in the bar. They claimed to work for Warner in the marketing dept, so I went on to tell them how shite Warner really is, that the only good things they've done are Babylon 5 and Bugs Bunny, and how they really need to start releasing good films before the company goes down the pan. Saw their pictures in the paper the next day - it was the Managing Director of Warner UK, and the Vice-President.

To be fair, they took it really well and even offered me tickets to an advance screening of the Matrix.
(Thu 15th Apr 2004, 9:29, More)

» Walkman Flashbacks

Flashbacks
Megadeth's youthanasia album reminds me of final fantasy 3 (or 6 depending on where you're from). Luckily I never listen to the crap anymore.
(Sat 26th Mar 2005, 23:12, More)