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FEATURES: B3TA AWARDS 2003

We asked you to vote for your favourite stuff on the web last year. You did in your droves. Here are the best things on the internet as voted for by you, YOU, the b3ta readers ...


BEST SITES

1. Weebl & Bob (Jonti Picking)
Jonti's pie-based animations stormed the net in 2002 and got him a daily spot on MTV. There's even talk on him coming front of camera for a new comedy show.


2. B3ta (Rob Manuel, Denise Wilton, Cal Henderson and everyone else)
Yay. We're the second best website in the whole world. Thanks. You cunts.


3. Rathergood (Joel Veitch)
Joel's kitten animations have been this year's All Your Base Are Belong To Us. This lead to animation work for Channel 4 and a rumoured children's comedy show.


RUNNERS UP:
Home Star Runner - best known as the home of the Strong Bad animations. They're great.

Something Awful - yank b3ta with excellent photoshops.


ANIMAL OF THE YEAR

1. Kitten
2. Donkey
3. Monkey
4. Penguin
5. Marmot
6. Cow
7. Chicken
8. Ostrich
9. Squirrel
10. Wolf



BEST ANIMATION

1. Weebl and Bob (Jonti Picking)
Jonti's first pie animation received the most votes. It's the original and still the best.


2. Kitten Band - Independent Woman (Joel Veitch)
Indie band Elbow recorded a cover version of the Destiny's Child track, Independent Woman. They used xylophones. Joel made an animation. He used kittens.


2. Patrick Moore Plays the Xylophone (Jonti Picking & Rob Manuel)
In equal 2nd place comes Rob & Jonti's attempt to get a UK number 1 record with cranky astronomer Patrick Moore. They are still hoping.


RUNNERS UP:
Strindberg and Helium - the perverse genius of teaming a gloomy Swedish playwright with a happy little balloon.

Xiao Xiao - the evergreen delights of a kung fu stick man.

Star Wars 'deleted scene' - exceptional work from Chicago Dave.


IDIOT OF THE YEAR

1. George W Bush - US President
2. DJ Hetz Hudson - spammer
3. Michael Jackson - Baby dangling madman
4. Bill Gates - Microsoft CEO
5. Weebl - Animated egg
6. Bob - Smaller animated egg
7. Gareth Gates - Reality show loser
8. John Leslie - Disgraced TV star
9. Jade from Big Brother - Reality show loser
10. Jeff - board member



BEST PHOTOSHOP

1. Argentinian team with handbags (Carl Baldwin)
Website designer Carl Baldwin created the Argentinian team with handbags picture. It went round the world. It ended up as the front page of the UK tabloid The Mirror winning them "Picture of the Year" in industry awards.


2. Chicago Dave's Pics (Dave Barton)
Dave Barton ruled the web with his timely photoshopping. The most popular images were Queen Mum Yoda, Cherie Blair/Myra Hindley and Queen in England Strip. The secret of his success? He used to be a "new media idiot" for major news agency.


3. Every Time You Masturbate, God Kills a Kitten (fark forums)
This picture, which first appeared on Fark, was so popular that the kitten is now named "Cliché Kitty". And they now refer to porn with "protect your kittens."


RUNNERS UP:
George Formby Rocks - brilliant work from board regular Rogan Josh.

Slim's How Strange - how could we pick a favourite from Slim's extensive work? You couldn't either and voted for his site.


LUNCHTIME TREAT

1. Jaffa Cakes
2. Dairylea Lunchables
3. Cheese
4. Sex
5. Food
6. McDonald's
7. Bacon Sandwich
8. Curry
9. Chocolate
10. Super Noodles



BEST WEB GAME

1. Trial Bikes (DNA)
This game utterly mystifies us, but you lot loved it. So it won.


2. Female or Shemale (Rob Manuel)
Who could dislike a game based on correctly identifying ladyboys? Certainly not you, apparently.


3. Name That Beard (Rob Manuel & Jonti Picking)
The beard: a sign of masculinity, of strength of character and, it seems, of good clean fun. Can you match the beard to the face?


RUNNERS UP: (this lot should keep you busy)
Atomic Badger Racing - great theme tune
Suicidal Super Puppy - for dog lovers
Monkey Lander - tricky
Angry Domo-Kun Smash Game - er
Crab Volleyball - all the fun of the crab
Insaniquarium - feed the fish
Frog - cute game from Orisinal
Pedestrian Killer - speedy car woo fun
Psycho Hypno Techno Kitten Snake - Nokia snake on kittens
Spot the Clifference - Cliff Richard. Nuff said
Alchemy - addictive pattern matching game
Gay Hunter Thing - French gay killing action. Hmm


MOST ANNOYING CATCHPHRASE

1. "Mmm... pie"
2. "Wassup!"
3. "Cheap as chips"
4. "You are the weakest link"
5. "Dsf adsfg afg fg"
6. "All your base are belong to us"
7. "Cashback!"
8. "War on Terror"
9. "Timmay!"
10. "Golf Sale"



HERO OF THE YEAR

1. Weebl - superstar animator/egg
2. Spiderman - heterosexual comic hero
3. Joel Veitch - TV's Mr Kitten
4. Peter Kay - fat northern comic
5. Rob Manuel - ginger fingered hero
6. Cal Henderson - b3ta's back end
7. Johnny Knoxville - celebrity stuntman
8. Strong Bad - sarcastic cartoon villain
9. Osama bin Laden - terrorist mastermind
10. Ozzie Osbourne - resurrected rock brummie



Thanks to everyone who voted, a big woo to everyone who's contributed to the site and a massive yay to David Stevenson & Cal Henderson for handling the vote.



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