we love the web
email us
Best of the Board


(Q4nobody, Fri 24 Oct, 10:36, 27 replies)


(Frogbeat, Thu 23 Oct, 19:47, 4 replies)
NEW IMAGE CHALLENGE - NEW RELIGIOUS PRODUCTS

This week we want to see everyday products and general shop tat transformed in to religious giftware.
Fill the shelves of the local church shop with exciting new stock.
Suggested by Monkeon
(HappyToast, Thu 23 Oct, 8:46, 4 replies)
No cake, but an enormous cream cracker down the back of the settee

(thecrapgatsby, Wed 22 Oct, 17:59, 8 replies)
She's not so keen on his recent stuff.

(monkeon, Wed 22 Oct, 10:37, 4 replies)
master of camoflage


(HappyToast, Tue 21 Oct, 17:26, 21 replies)
Evening

(Frogbeat, Mon 20 Oct, 20:07, 7 replies)
Hello.

(barst, Sun 19 Oct, 12:41, 5 replies)
I still upload my videos the old fashioned way

(monkeon, Wed 15 Oct, 19:46, 7 replies)
He's great at British Bulldog.


(Shlvng, Fri 10 Oct, 13:27, 19 replies)
XML feeds
Newsletter
B3ta newsletter issue number six hundred and forty two... Would it be cool if we just started the numbers back again from zero? It's a bit scary. Anyway, quality stuff this week includes taking the piss out of Cameron Carpenter, taking the geotags out of your data and taking potshots at a hapless conductor in a game inexplicably based on the 1812 Overture.
Read newsletter 642
published by rob on 24th Oct at 7pm
Question of the Week
Control Freaks
Peej writes, "My mate Tony's dad used to weigh the breakfast cereal in the morning to make sure everybody got an equal amount and the pack provided the exact amount of servings advertised on the packet. I learned from this that the recommended serving size on a cereal packet isn't enough to feed a sparrow."

Sound familiar? Tell us more.
Read all 14 stories (open)
asked by chthonic on 24th Oct at 1pm
Challenge
New Religious Products
This week we want to see everyday products and general shop tat transformed in to religious giftware. Fill the shelves of the local church shop with exciting new stock.
See all 43 images (open)
set by HappyToast on 23rd Oct at 8am
Extreeeeeme Hurdles
aka monglympics

See all 20 popular links (7 made popular today)
linked to by Cragget on 25th Oct at 11am
Newsletter
B3ta Newsletter 641! A hat-trick of quality newsletter product! Douglas Adams, kittens, ukulele, music and the kitchen of the future!
Read newsletter 641
published by rob on 17th Oct at 6pm
Question of the Week
Silly Achievements
Happy Phantom writes, "Sometimes - by planning or happy accident - you achieve something with which you are quite pleased, but which makes little or no difference to the rest of the world.

"This morning, I woke up and spontaneously farted the opening three notes from The Frog Chorus."

What did YOU do?
Read all 121 stories (closed)
asked by chthonic on 16th Oct at 4pm
Challenge
Cakes in films
We're combining two of our favourite things again, cakes and films. Add Victoria Sponges, eclairs and Jaffa cakes to famous film scenes, adapt plots to be about baking and maybe re-enact some in your local Greggs.
See all 137 images (open)
set by HappyToast on 16th Oct at 8am
Newsletter
B3ta Newsletter 640! Yes, another newsletter out - and bloody hell if it isn't full of good stuff? Black Doctor Who, a new way of cooking pizza and a remake of Apocalypse Now with cuddly toys - PLUS your stories of landing face-down in shit!
Read newsletter 640
published by rob on 10th Oct at 4pm
Question of the Week
Nepotism
Ages ago Danishbacon suggested we ask about nepotism. As we weren't related, we ignored this.
Tell us your worst examples, or admit to the time you employed your cousin and he totally fucked the job up.
Read all 62 stories (closed)
asked by chthonic on 10th Oct at 2pm
Challenge
Useless Machines
This weeks challenge is to invent a wonderful machine that achieves nothing of merit at all. Hurry to your drawing board and draw up some cogs, pistons, bleepy bits and flanges and if possible animate them doing nothing.
See all 31 images (closed)
set by HappyToast on 9th Oct at 8am
Question of the Week
Real Life Slapstick II
What's the best slapstick thing you've ever seen?
Have you witnessed someone walking into a lamp-post? A food fight? Someone clonked round the face with a frying pan? All your favourite moments please.
(suggested by social hand grenade)
Read all 87 stories (closed)
asked by chthonic on 5th Oct at 4pm
Newsletter
B3ta Newsletter 639 is available for your reading pleasure. Yes, it's been a while. Sorry we've been so rubbish and lazy - we promise from now on only to be rubbish and productive.
Read newsletter 639
published by rob on 3rd Oct at 3pm
Challenge
Victorians
Take a trip back in time to when men wore big hats, ladies wore massive skirts and people took photos of their dead children. It's Victorians this week, so lets visit their world of early photography and give it the photoshop treatment.
See all 88 images (closed)
set by HappyToast on 2nd Oct at 8am
Question of the Week
Celebrations, anniversaries and milestones
Willenium says: I just reached the big 10 on b3ta, so tell us your stories of big date milestones from relationships, birthdays, work and life-changing choices.
Read all 101 stories (closed)
asked by Scaryduck on 25th Sep at 2pm
Challenge
Dead Celebs
This weeks image challenge is to peer beyond the mortal realm and see what fun and games our favourite dead celebrities are up to.
Who is hanging out with who, where do they go and most importantly what do they look like.
See all 40 images (closed)
set by HappyToast on 25th Sep at 8am
Challenge
Fake Fables
This week we're reinventing Fables and Fairy tales. Update them, rewrite them, come up with your own ones and then show us the inevitable Disney retelling.
Suggested by Jabberwoc
See all 38 images (closed)
set by HappyToast on 18th Sep at 8am
Question of the Week
Fears and Phobias
I'll level with you. I'm really freaked out by loose buttons. I'm fine while they're doing their job, but once they're free the evil bastards are a major threat to my life. Tell us what spooks you, and how you cope. Also: church bells, doner kebab salads, death.
Read all 198 stories (closed)
asked by Scaryduck on 11th Sep at 5pm
Challenge
Legs
30 years ago ZZ Top informed us "She's got legs, she knows how to use them". Now it's your turn, show us you know how to use them and celebrate lower limbs in all their forms.
Challenge suggested by Sentimental
See all 65 images (closed)
set by HappyToast on 11th Sep at 8am
Question of the Week
Dates Gone Wrong
Ever gone on a date when "she" turned out to be a male university lecturer in his 50s who tucked his shirt into his Y-fronts? No, me neither. Tell us how it all went shit-faced.
Read all 101 stories (closed)
asked by Scaryduck on 4th Sep at 1pm
Challenge
If fruit and veg ruled the world
This week we want to see a fruit and veg ruled the world.
How would we adapt to our cabbagey leaders, would wars erupt between greenhouse factions, how would vegetarians survive?
Challenge suggested by monkeon
See all 73 images (closed)
set by HappyToast on 4th Sep at 8am
Hurrah! The b3ta dictionary is home. The lovely mictoboy and the effervescent Kamikaze Stoat have handed us teh uplaod codez to the b3ta dictionary, which we're now hosting here. Check it out.
posted by cr3 on 29th Aug at 1pm
Question of the Week
Misheard and Misunderstood
Rachelswipe says: My niece - after months of begging - was finally allowed to get a hamster, and her grandfather was utterly horrified to learn that it had been called "Nipples", a pretty good name for a pet if you ask us. Alas, it was only the more mundane "Nibbles" - what have you misheard or misunderstood, with truly hilarious consequences?
Read all 112 stories (closed)
asked by Scaryduck on 28th Aug at 9pm
Challenge
ZX Spectrum
This weeks image challenge is anything and everything to do with the beloved Sinclair ZX Spectrum. Celebrate Sir Clive's computer revolution, rejoice at the games of Ultimate and mock the pitiful colours and tape loading errors.
See all 55 images (closed)
set by HappyToast on 28th Aug at 8am