Best thing you've ever built
The weirder the better. My dad and I once built a go-kart from chipboard, pram wheels and an engine from a lawn mower. It didn't work cos it was an engine from a push along mower so it only had enough power to spin a blade.
Catostrophic failures also welcome
(wehttamman via B3ta for microwave, Sun 7 Oct 2012, 9:00, 1 reply, 12 years ago)

Best fancy dress costumes
Bonus points for not just find pics from the lolinternet
( mictoboy shitting in your cunt since, Wed 3 Oct 2012, 18:59, 2 replies, latest was 12 years ago)

Beer guilts
We all get them. Quite a wide topic really. What is the worst beer guilt youve ever experienced?
(Dan dan dan They tik urh jerbs!!!, Mon 1 Oct 2012, 17:14, Reply)

What I did on my school Holidays?
Topical if nothing else.
(Gru being trolled since 1998, Mon 1 Oct 2012, 12:40, Reply)

Yin and yang
I bought a giant custard cream from Costa yesterday. It was absolutely delicious, until halfway through I found what can only be described as a pube embedded in the biscuit.

What wonderful things have been marred for you, or to look at it the other way round, what shit situations have been rescued by something awesome?
( CaptainCrackerjack live trout, slow motion, Sun 30 Sep 2012, 11:04, Reply)

Following on from the bad taste house shown on /links
Traits that drive you insane, like the need to buy a fucking fridge magnet from EVERYWHERE you visit (my ex MIL) or seeing staircase not as a potentially hazardous series of steps but as a handy shelving unit for slippery/triphazard/obstructive items.
Go on, let it all out.
(Captain Placid 24/7 ball gags, brownie mix and clown porn, Sun 30 Sep 2012, 10:48, Reply)

Little Bastards in school.
Some kids are, for want of a better word, just plain Evil. Whether it's dropping a brick on the class hamster or stealing the asthmatic kid's inhaler, they seem to show no remorse or fear of authority. What did the class Satan-child get up to when you were at school?
( Rotating Wobbly Hat That's not a banana. THIS is a banana., Sat 29 Sep 2012, 16:48, Reply)

Hospital tales
On my recent stay in the bowel ward, I met some interesting characters and some lovely staff. However, it stank of colostomy bags, one chap told the nurse that he'd had a 'lovely motion', and I had to listen through a door that didn't shut properly to quite ill men violently emptying their bowels with astonishing clarity. What tales of hospital can you share?
( CaptainCrackerjack live trout, slow motion, Fri 28 Sep 2012, 20:36, 2 replies, latest was 12 years ago)

Feeble excuses.
My grandad's mate once claimed that he found his wife in bed starkers with a gentleman who was equally unclothed.
Her reply 'the laundry's taking a while'.
( Amorous Badger NAKED BEA ARTHUR PHOTOS 4U, Fri 28 Sep 2012, 19:04, Reply)

Amazing interpretations of films
I discovered today that The Rock is a James Bond film (the John Mason character is James Bond). Well, some people think it is, at least. What amazing interpretations have you heard about films?
( CaptainCrackerjack live trout, slow motion, Fri 28 Sep 2012, 17:37, Reply)

Spontaneous Passion
B3tans are reputedly an amorous bunch, so share your stories of spontaneous and or/adventurous nooky here.

For the sake of inclusiveness, sweaty parents’ basement dwellers might also share danger wank anecdotes. But nothing too gross, okay?

I estimate that at least 93.5% of responses will be lies.
(Bicycle Repairman "you're also a bit of a wanker", Thu 27 Sep 2012, 13:09, Reply)

Pandemonium or When Crowds Go Wild!
Have you ever been I situation of mass hysteria? Were you scared for your life? Was it your fault? Was it on fire? Did you have a cheeky wank while everyone around you was losing their heads?
Probably best we leave the hillsborough stories out of this.
( Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Thu 27 Sep 2012, 8:41, Reply)

what's the biggest thing you've ever had up your arse?

( mictoboy shitting in your cunt since, Wed 26 Sep 2012, 23:12, 2 replies, latest was 12 years ago)

What do other people think of you?
There are rare occasions in life where you've overheard someone talking about you/intercepted an email about yourself/been with a drunken acquaintance who suddenly decided to tell you exactly what they thought of your haircut... so what exactly have you discovered about yourself through the eyes of other people?
( The Silent Channel is getting his recommended 5-a-day, Wed 26 Sep 2012, 11:02, Reply)

Ignore 2.0
*Personally I suspect we are now at 2.1 or 2.2*
Seems to have been a watershed moment for b3ta.

Do you agree with it, or not?
How has it affected your browsing of b3ta?
Better, worse or meh?
How many times have you logged out recently to see who's commenting on your posts that you can't see whilst logged in?

FTR: From me - it's shit. Badly thought out and poorly implemented.
Cheers Mods.
(Misery McUglywife an attention seeking sociopathic fuckstain., Wed 26 Sep 2012, 7:54, Reply)

Weird Family Recipes
When I was young I went to my friend's house for dinner and we had pasta twists with ketchup, that was it. Describe weird meals you've been forced to endure, or have in your own family's cookbook that you all love to eat but probably shouldn't admit to outsiders...
(Mr_Lew, Sat 22 Sep 2012, 21:51, 1 reply, 12 years ago)

Ginger part 2

(lanternchikk hat eine schwere Bohlenallergie, Thu 20 Sep 2012, 11:21, Reply)

An invention you'd like to make
And why?
(robneymcplum spiced up his life on, Thu 20 Sep 2012, 0:24, Reply)

I've got diarrhoea. When was the last time you soiled yourself?

( 4Q just lurking, Wed 19 Sep 2012, 23:19, Reply)

Now what would be good
would be a whole bloody week
of haiku on here
(magic the cat will someone please think of the kittens, Wed 19 Sep 2012, 18:36, Reply)

SHEDULUS fan fiction.
Extra points for GARAGETRON.
( stuj (^(^;;^)^) GO TEAM SPIDERS!(^(^;;^)^), Wed 19 Sep 2012, 14:59, Reply)

my suggestion "why don't you all just stop fucking lying and tell the truth for just five fucking minutes in your life!"
or whatever, i don't care.
( The Doveston haunted by the memory of his own amnesia, Tue 18 Sep 2012, 16:11, Reply)

Workplace awardness
"It was after I had finally managed to reboot the computer network and deflected all the angry phone calls from users in the Far East that I realised I was standing in the server room at three in the morning, naked."
( Scaryduck LIKES EGG, Tue 18 Sep 2012, 12:57, Reply)

Shit claims to fame.
I've been bought a drink by top fridge enthusiast Terry Waite and was once, for approximately a quarter of a second, in an episode of 'Lovejoy'.
( Amorous Badger NAKED BEA ARTHUR PHOTOS 4U, Sun 16 Sep 2012, 18:12, 4 replies, latest was 12 years ago)

Fucking fine then, no bedtime stories.
Rewrite a classic fairy tale, replacing major characters with prolific b3ta users.
( BraynDedd Natasha Kaplinsky's labia majora, Thu 13 Sep 2012, 17:26, Reply)

Holidays
I once spent time in a hotel in China where I had an unusual meeting with a rat. We met as I wee'd into a toilet, just at the precise moment he chose to swim up the U-bend. What interesting holiday storiesdo you have?
(Dan dan dan They tik urh jerbs!!!, Thu 13 Sep 2012, 11:52, Reply)

'...and then I woke up.'
You had a LOVELY time last night, went home with a smashing looking young lady/gentleman/quadruped and THEN you wake up and reality punches you square in the FACE.
( Amorous Badger NAKED BEA ARTHUR PHOTOS 4U, Tue 11 Sep 2012, 16:00, 1 reply, 12 years ago)

tattoos
have you got a tattoo of a robot marching across you scrotum?
Or a tattoo of a unicorn fisting hitler in your armpit?

bonus points for not posting shit tattoos you've found on the lolinternet
( mictoboy shitting in your cunt since, Mon 10 Sep 2012, 20:22, 1 reply, 12 years ago)