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[challenge entry] Recommended by grandmothers everywhere.

From the Alternative Medicine challenge. See all 199 entries (closed)

(I helped save b3ta! An Egg ,D, Thu 7 Jan 2010, 2:30, archived)
# fuck!
you beat me to it!
(I helped save b3ta! Smash Monkey lowering the tone of the whole internet, Thu 7 Jan 2010, 2:32, archived)
# I was half way to linking it to your
*sips slowly* post.
(I helped save b3ta! An Egg ,D, Thu 7 Jan 2010, 2:33, archived)
# heheheh
i've just finished my pre-bed cuppa
(I helped save b3ta! Smash Monkey lowering the tone of the whole internet, Thu 7 Jan 2010, 2:34, archived)
# This is gospel in my house.
After 16 months of putting up with my shit, I've finally gotten my other half to put the kettle on as soon as anyone comes through the door.

When we moved into our flat, the first thing I unpacked was the kettle and teabags. She offered to go out for milk and sugar. I knew at that very moment she was the one for me.
(King of Swandanavia Proud owner of the worlds first Flong, Thu 7 Jan 2010, 2:33, archived)
# same with me
workmen love doing jobs at my house, they know the kettle is always on!
(I helped save b3ta! Smash Monkey lowering the tone of the whole internet, Thu 7 Jan 2010, 2:35, archived)
# I have a cup the size of a bucket that I got from a work collegue at christmas.
Its enormous and has Old Git emblazoned on the side. Its what I use to help me get out of bed in the mornings. A normal sized cup just doesnt work.
(King of Swandanavia Proud owner of the worlds first Flong, Thu 7 Jan 2010, 2:40, archived)
# you should see my mug
it's from disneyland, it's 3 times bigger than a normal mug and you need both hands to lift it. it takes 3 pyramid bags to make a decent cuppa in it!
(I helped save b3ta! Smash Monkey lowering the tone of the whole internet, Thu 7 Jan 2010, 2:43, archived)
# I got a flower pot from WalMart,
it is the shape of a tea-cup and stands in a saucer, it has no drainage holes.

Bidding starts at £10

(Edit: It currently has a dead basil plant in it, but I'll wash it)
(I helped save b3ta! An Egg ,D, Thu 7 Jan 2010, 2:58, archived)
# I am a horrible bastard
I let them in and go back to bed
(JoePesky, Thu 7 Jan 2010, 2:40, archived)
# i only go back to bed
if one of them goes with me
(I helped save b3ta! Smash Monkey lowering the tone of the whole internet, Thu 7 Jan 2010, 2:42, archived)
# Great way
to get your plumbing sorted.
(I helped save b3ta! An Egg ,D, Thu 7 Jan 2010, 2:46, archived)
# yeah
but you've got to watch they don't fit a washer in the wrong place
(I helped save b3ta! Smash Monkey lowering the tone of the whole internet, Thu 7 Jan 2010, 2:47, archived)
# Cos then
You'd be screwed.
(I helped save b3ta! An Egg ,D, Thu 7 Jan 2010, 3:19, archived)
# euphamism euphamism cacophemism
(I helped save b3ta! arrangedletters, Thu 7 Jan 2010, 5:19, archived)
# This should win it.
(I helped save b3ta! Tahkcalb ω∞ for sigs, Thu 7 Jan 2010, 2:46, archived)
# Thanks
But unlikely.
(I helped save b3ta! An Egg ,D, Thu 7 Jan 2010, 3:12, archived)
# There follows a sad tale.
Over the holidays I had my gallbladder removed. Now I don't like tea so much any more. Strange but true.
(I helped save b3ta! mofaha ┐( ˘_˘)┌ ʅ(́◡◝)ʃ, Thu 7 Jan 2010, 2:46, archived)
# Sorry to hear that.
(I helped save b3ta! An Egg ,D, Thu 7 Jan 2010, 2:50, archived)
# On the plus side
they also later removed a gallstone that was lodged in my common bile duct and was causing gallstone pancreatitis, so I'm not in mindbending fucking agony any more, plus I can actually eat.
(I helped save b3ta! mofaha ┐( ˘_˘)┌ ʅ(́◡◝)ʃ, Thu 7 Jan 2010, 2:55, archived)
# Eating is good
So is not being in mindbending fucking agony

Tea is overrated

Sounds to me like you came out in front
(I helped save b3ta! gronkpan https://twitter.com/VomitingLarry, Thu 7 Jan 2010, 2:57, archived)
# You're not wrong.
Plus I got to spend the runup to christmas high on morphine. Legitimately.
(I helped save b3ta! mofaha ┐( ˘_˘)┌ ʅ(́◡◝)ʃ, Thu 7 Jan 2010, 2:59, archived)
# Last time I was offered morphine I turned it down,
I really can't stand heavy painkillers. I'd rather just smoke some weed.
(I helped save b3ta! gronkpan https://twitter.com/VomitingLarry, Thu 7 Jan 2010, 3:12, archived)
# Hahaha
my poor buddy in London tried to help me out when I started to get really badly sick. Now his new nickname for me is "The Locust" because of all the crops I devastated while was there.
(I helped save b3ta! mofaha ┐( ˘_˘)┌ ʅ(́◡◝)ʃ, Thu 7 Jan 2010, 3:17, archived)
# hahaha
HOOVER MANOUVRE
(I helped save b3ta! gronkpan https://twitter.com/VomitingLarry, Thu 7 Jan 2010, 3:20, archived)
# *snorts*
(I helped save b3ta! An Egg ,D, Thu 7 Jan 2010, 3:23, archived)
# I have pictures.
(I helped save b3ta! mofaha ┐( ˘_˘)┌ ʅ(́◡◝)ʃ, Thu 7 Jan 2010, 2:57, archived)
#

(I helped save b3ta! PedroHin Come along & ride on a Flantastic Voyage, Thu 7 Jan 2010, 3:00, archived)
# ^this
(I helped save b3ta! An Egg ,D, Thu 7 Jan 2010, 3:01, archived)
# A life of boiled potpourri for you now.
You'll end up smelling like an old woman's backside, no doubt.
(I helped save b3ta! Tahkcalb ω∞ for sigs, Thu 7 Jan 2010, 2:50, archived)
# HOT
(I helped save b3ta! mofaha ┐( ˘_˘)┌ ʅ(́◡◝)ʃ, Thu 7 Jan 2010, 2:57, archived)
# they removed your tea gland!
this is so sad that i'm going to bed.
g'night all!
(I helped save b3ta! Smash Monkey lowering the tone of the whole internet, Thu 7 Jan 2010, 2:53, archived)
# I told my girls I've had my Englishness removed.
They're not too happy. Without that, I'm just an offensive dick who hangs around on dodgy websites.
(I helped save b3ta! mofaha ┐( ˘_˘)┌ ʅ(́◡◝)ʃ, Thu 7 Jan 2010, 2:56, archived)
# Hahaha
I might have to try that one some time.
(Edit: Hopefully not surgery, just telling people here that I've had my Englishness removed)
(I helped save b3ta! An Egg ,D, Thu 7 Jan 2010, 3:01, archived)
# How strange. You must have lost some Englishness with your gall bladder.
My liver pear was removed a year and a half ago, and I still have pain in that area. I'm fairly certain this isn't normal, but tests didn't turn up anything. Probably one of the little clips on the bile ducts got loose and is now buried in my liver.
(I helped save b3ta! Shiksa, Thu 7 Jan 2010, 3:29, archived)
# I'm googling liver pear
and all I'm finding is recipes. Horrible, horrible recipes.
(I helped save b3ta! mofaha ┐( ˘_˘)┌ ʅ(́◡◝)ʃ, Thu 7 Jan 2010, 4:04, archived)
# I ganked the phrase "liver pear" from here.
In fact, I think you were the one who coined it. Either you or Postbear.

In any case, I hope you are feeling better without the pet rock in your bile duct.
(I helped save b3ta! Shiksa, Thu 7 Jan 2010, 4:10, archived)
# Thanks :)
I guess it could have been me, but it does sound a lot like postbear.
(I helped save b3ta! mofaha ┐( ˘_˘)┌ ʅ(́◡◝)ʃ, Thu 7 Jan 2010, 4:13, archived)
# Coming on here, not liking tea?
You've got some g-... Oh wait.
(Richy_T hundreds if not thousands of dollars, Thu 7 Jan 2010, 4:48, archived)
# my littlest subo project just hit a wall
this cheered me up
(I helped save b3ta! Jamnog Sardines in her eyebrows, lobsters up and down, Thu 7 Jan 2010, 3:05, archived)
# You know what you need...
(I helped save b3ta! An Egg ,D, Thu 7 Jan 2010, 3:10, archived)
# sleep
ZZzzzZZzzzz
(I helped save b3ta! Jamnog Sardines in her eyebrows, lobsters up and down, Thu 7 Jan 2010, 3:27, archived)
# And then a nice cuppa.
Night all.
(I helped save b3ta! An Egg ,D, Thu 7 Jan 2010, 3:45, archived)