Abusing freebiesA friend of mine recently attended a 'Champaign Lunch', where he was compelled drink as much fizzy stuff as he could between the first and last courses. In an ideal world we'd ask restaurant staff to tell us stories about fatties stuffing themselves at All You Can Eat places, but we recognise that our members don't all work in the catering trade, so for the rest of you - tell us something about abusing freebies. BTW: Bee puns = you fail.
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lizard, Thu 8 Nov 2007, 14:16)
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Beer Money!Years and years ago when I still had charm, wit, and enough brain cells left to work out basic arithmetic, I worked at a rather big club in Birmingham. There was a rather fruitful scam that was passed on from barman to barman (in a kind of old man passing down tales sort of way) of improving the slightly shite wages that was paid for delivering Birmingham's worst alcoholic beverages to the unsuspecting (pissed / drugged up) public.
The rules are thus, and read like the ten commandments;
1. Do not try this on anyone who appears sober.
2. Don't take the piss.
3. When drunk / drugged up idiot comes to bar requesting a large round of drinks, automatically add £2 to the round. (They, due to large amount of drinks, never check change and pocket money automatically.)
4. Serve drinks, and return change to the punter.
5. Ensure the £2 stays in the till!
6. Upon next punter, serve drinks, give change, and subtract the previous £2, muttering "Cheers pal, nice one".
7. Deposit £2 into your tip glass, and move onto next punter.
8. Repeat this numerous times during the night (taking note of rule 2).
9. Use the ill gotten gains to fund after club finshing time drinks (read : piss up) to create a sensation of drunkeness.
10. Use remaining funds to buy kebab / big morning breakfast sandwich from Irish cafe across the way and enjoy!!
Winnar!!
(
Tesco Quality 60.825659, -0.788337, Sat 10 Nov 2007, 22:36,
3 replies)
huh...uh, don't get it...am I thick or have you not explained this very well?
you overcharge some bloke 2quid, but put it in the till, and the next guy you take 2quid off his bill? Where do you win?
(, Sun 11 Nov 2007, 21:37, closed)
spare changeI can only assume that you refund the money on the second round to make the end of day float on the till match up with the takings. the spare money is therefore non existant and is then put in the tips bottle. Is that how it works?
(, Mon 12 Nov 2007, 8:32, closed)
It's like this...I do believe that when he wrote "subtract the previous £2", he meant: take the next customer's change out of the till - INCLUDING the £2 overcharged from the previous customer. Then hand the second customer's [correct] change back, leaving £2 in your hand - which is deposited in the tips jar.
The point of leaving the first customer's extra £2 in the till is so that anyone paying close attention would not see the barman keeping cash (and thus creating trouble) - and the point of muttering "cheers pal" is to present to anyone watching that the second customer had actually given a tip - which is then deposited into the jar.
(, Mon 12 Nov 2007, 9:08, closed)
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