Not my story, but someone I'm very close to.
As you all know by now, I'm dating a guy 25 years my senior.
He has 2 kids, one is 23, the other turned 21 on Friday.

His daughter is the one that turned 21.

3 years ago, she started "experimenting" with weed and speed. She got addicted to crystal meth. She stole around $15,000 from her mom and dad. No matter what any of us tried to do for her (this is before "us") and for the family, the nature of addiction doesn't allow for a user to admit they have a problem until they're either a) hitting rock bottom on the streets or b) incarcerated. This also goes for the family.

2 years ago, this beautiful, vibrant girl that I knew since she was 14 turned into a lying, theiving little slutbag who would do anything for her next fix.
So much so, that she was the "getaway" driver in a house robbery and was subsequently caught and thrown in jail. Her dad got a good lawyer, so instead of 6 years in State Prison she got 2 years in the County Jail and 3 years probation.

But it doesn't end there. In July last year, her mom who had valiantly battled cancer for 6 years finally succumbed to MRSA. It happened within 36 hours from when she was hospitalized to the time she passed away. Meanwhile, the girl was still in jail.

Her dad called the jail to ask if he could get an emergency visit, and they said no. They said the warden could tell her mom had gone. Obviously, this wasn't an option, so he had to go to jail 2 days later and tell her over the phone.

No matter how much people have fucked up, to have to tell your daughter her mom is dead.....it made me shudder then, and it makes me shudder more so now.

She was due to get out in January this year ('08), but she was allowed early release on house arrest and an ankle monitor on compassionate grounds. She got lucky.

Since then, she's violated her probation once and was subsequently incarcerated again for 90 days. She continues to lie and be a slut, but she's no longer tweaking and she doesn't steal.

I've since got together romantically with her dad, and that's been hard for her, but we've started to become good friends. She knows that I know she lies (caught her out a million times and called her on it) but she also has no adult female influence in her life. And I hope that one day she'll realize that I've been the only person there for her since she got out of jail.

I'm not trying to be her mom, I'm not trying to even be any kind of stepmum. I'm just trying to be a friend that's not a stoner or a fuckup.

We bonded this last few days in Vegas (we took her for her 21st, and none of her "friends" would come with) and she told me "I love you, you're a great friend and you rock".

Made me smile.

She's in full time college now and I just hope that one day she can get on track, and get a job, and not have the stigma of "convicted drug felon" on her, 'cos she is a good kid.

Length - almost 2 years in county.
( Batshitmentalist is sane for once, Fri 19 Dec 2008, 6:33, 6 replies)

Hope it works out in the end.
Unfortunately not even a good family background can save a person from drugs addiction.
( girlinthehole, Fri 19 Dec 2008, 8:36, closed)

Totally true that, BGB
I have a cousin who is a "recovering" heroine addict who despite living in his mothers house aged 30 still has no relationship with her.

She's finally given up on him for good and moved to Turkey with her new beau.

We have a huge really close family - we all see each other often and get on well enough.

Man, I hate a cliche but the fella seemed to just fall in with a bad crowd.
(bazmorningstar efil4nat3b, Fri 19 Dec 2008, 9:39, closed)

Eh?
You took her to Vegas as part of the clean up process? Brilliant.

Maybe Amsterdam next time? Or Afghanistan?
(Tugnut I got them all..., Fri 19 Dec 2008, 10:33, closed)

Harsh, very harsh!
Shoes, walk, etc....
(Festus, Sat 20 Dec 2008, 18:05, closed)

Sorry, which part of my story did I say we took her as part of the cleanup process?
We took her for her 21st birthday.

She's been off drugs since she got out of jail.
( Batshitmentalist is sane for once, Sun 21 Dec 2008, 2:38, closed)

Woo!
Go you. Hope you rock for all eternity.

The world needs more non-judgemental people like you.

Please accept this small click as a token of my appreciation
(MadBouncyDog Barking at the moon since, Fri 19 Dec 2008, 19:55, closed)