Stealing
I am addicted to steal crappy stuff while drunk on the streets.

Thing include, but are not limited to:

- A black cocker spaniel, that I called "There you are, once"
- A bicycle from barcelona's public transportation system (bicing.com)
- A samsonite luggage, 1 meter high.
- A sony tv. 29". Still works.
- Three refrigerators. One is chilling my beer right now.
- Two matresses for 2 people, one for one person, an iron bed, and an Ikea bed for 2.
- A tombstone. Never knew where it came from.
- A jacket. My friend is using it.
- A grunge shirt, from a beggar in san francisco.
- A vw's clutch, to fry shrimp. It did make sense at the time,
- Two chickens, in curitiba, brazil. Some biker's father did an amazing soup.
- The Kozmik Blues trumpetman's bike. He was VERY upset.
- A suzuki bandit 1200. I knew the gate's password, and I always left the key on it. Gave it back later.
- My school's van. Several times.
- The confession's chair in a church in ribeirão preto, brazil.
- A fucking whole tuna.
- A whalehunter boat. 30 feet. Quite didn't work (the steal, not the boat).
- Several canoes.
- A honda shadow. Woke up 150km far from where I was supposed to be.
- A christmas tree. It was july.
- A dead tree. It's five feet now, and it's beautiful!
- A barrel.
- Some traffic sign. Not the obvious ones. This had 1.60 meters and couldn't fit inside my car.
- A road sign written "Salvador de Bahia 900km". No idea how I managed to take this to my house - which was in salvador indeed. The sign had about 3 meters.
- Two human femur, and a human skull.
- One bucket full of live crabs.
- A minnie mouse hanger, where you can measure yourself, up to 1,20m. I am 1,84.
- The "yield" road sign, WITH THE POLE! No idea how I managed to carry it in my motorcycle. When I tried to throw it away, two guys were required in order to carry the whole bang.
- Drugs, from the hospital, when I was doing med school.
- A horse's saddle. I tied it to my bike, and went to some friend's house screaming HHHHHHHHHHEEEYYYYYY HORSEYY
- 50 (yea, fifty) green coconuts.
- A 9ft wide parabollic antenna. It's in my beach's house.
- 1kg of marijuana some bloke left on the school. I gave it back later (slightly lighter I confess)
- Some cow's skull. I replaced some parts of the bike with it.
- A gas' cylinder from some street food vendor. Still dunno why.
- A cone. Well, ok. The problem was that the cone had a policeman holding it. And we were at 70km/h. My friend almost broke his arm.
- Mirrors, some many mirros. One from an elevator.
- A public telephone, cashewnut-shaped.
- An ice cream from the trashbin. There was some girl who had a crush on me, so I gave her. When she went to my sister to tell her, my sister just said "throw this shit away at once! My brother would NEVER give something to anyone that wasn't from the trash!". Don't know why the girl never spoke to me again.
(surak, Sat 20 Dec 2008, 13:49, 9 replies)

<title>
I wasn't aware that being pissed out of your brains could be an acceptable excuse for theft.
(blueberrypossum wants to Jaffa your Cake, Sat 20 Dec 2008, 15:29, closed)

Oh dear
Unfortunately, I read
"- A minnie mouse hanger, where you can measure yourself, up to 1,20m"
as
"- A minnie mouse hanger, where you can pleasure yourself, up to 1,20m"
( laminasni isn't., Sat 20 Dec 2008, 15:50, closed)

I wonder if the people you stole things from thought they were crappy.
Ever considered therapy?
( FeralCatMan Unusual disease collector., Sat 20 Dec 2008, 18:46, closed)

'Don't know why the girl never spoke to me again.'
I'd like to hypothesise that it's because you're a jackass.

Jackass.
(Ellinikos contains a source of phenylalanine, Sat 20 Dec 2008, 21:07, closed)

were you the person
who took the bicing bike to Lleida?
(bamboozled Can hear you getting fatter, Sun 21 Dec 2008, 0:17, closed)

Stealing is bad
Maybe you should stop drinking?!
(laurasuper, Mon 22 Dec 2008, 0:57, closed)

FUCK OFF THE FUCKING LOT OF YOU
- A fucking whole tuna!!

FTW

guy is a fucking lurching pissed up kelpto genius

god there are some mormon dullards on here these days
( spimf ™ is whoever you want him to be, Tue 23 Dec 2008, 0:22, closed)

Ahaha!

( Noeli overtheshoulderboulderholderthingstraplatchboobs, Tue 23 Dec 2008, 20:27, closed)

spimfy
you are inimitable.


bagsee the skull.
( Madam Marlboro wonders if you've found her yet, Tue 23 Dec 2008, 11:02, closed)