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This is a question Banks

Your Ginger Fuhrer froths, "I hate my bank. Not because of debt or anything but because I hate being sold to - possibly pathologically so - and everytime I speak to them they try and sell me services. Gold cards, isas, insurance, you know the crap. It drives me insane. I ALREADY BANK WITH YOU. STOP IT. YOU MAKE ME FRIGHTED TO DO MY NORMAL BANKING. I'm angry even thinking about them."

So, tell us your banking stories of woe.

No doubt at least one of you has shagged in the vault, shat on a counter or thrown up in a cash machine. Or something

(, Thu 16 Jul 2009, 13:15)
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A new account, coffee and a bit of oral sex...
I'd decided I wanted to open a new savings account and after scanning a few of the comparison websites, Halifax was to be my chosen bank (also aided by the fact that of all the banks, The Halifax is closest to where I live).

Working throughout the week and not wanting to waste my precious weekends, I thought it best to venture to Halifax during a lunch break, giving me 50 minutes to queue, hand over the already filled in application form and ID (including a utlilty bill)and deposit £10 cash into my newly opened account. What I hadn't chanced upon was being served by Susan.

Ahhh, Susan. Her brunette hair and deep brown eyes will forever stay in my memory; her sweet soft lips forever encrusted in my mind in the file marked 'wanking material'.

'Cashier number 2 please' came the voice from the tannoy, and it was finally my turn to be served after about 10 minutes of waiting patiently. As I stepped up to the perspex window of despair, I noticed a radiant smile beaming back at me and a split second later a pretty face, with toussled, tangled locks swept delicately behind each ear. Her eyes were warm and gentle; instantly carming.

My eyes drifted south, and an ample chest, tightly packed into Susan's blue blouse, heaved back at me with every breathe she took. I thought to myself that I'd be able to peek a bit of bra if I was stood to one side of her, as the fabric between each button was forced apart under the strain of her bust. Dirty thoughts raced through my mind.

"How can I help?" said Susan gently.

'Shit, I've been caught staring' I thought to myself.

"I'd like to open a new account please" came my mumbled response, my face getting hotter and more crimson by the second. I was in lust; I wanted Susan there and then, it was a longing that I'd never experienced in my life up to that point, and haven't since.

15 minutes or so passed and my new account was set up and ready for use, but all I could think about during that time was she. I lost the ability to write; I struggled to sign my name. I'm sure I said one or two stupid things, maybe more, but she had laughed at my lame jokes. She twisted her hair in her fingers as she spoke to me. Was this flirting? According to the magazines it was.
I wanted to see Susan again. Soon. But how? It was as she handed me back my ID that I decided to chance it...

"Would you be up for going for a coffee tomorrow lunch time". I couldn't believe that I'd come out with it. She was out of my league, a stunner, she'd have a boyfriend for sure.

"Sure, why not. Here's my number, I have lunch from one to two o'clock tomorrow" replied Susan, smiling.

I smiled back, "See you then", and walked out of Halifax. I almost jumped and clicked my heels together as I made my way back to work; tomorrow couldn't come soon enough.

===========

We sat upstairs in Costa making small talk, edging ever closer to each other until our thighs were touching. I felt an instant shock run up my leg and all the way up my spine. My heart fluttered with desire and I watched her; 'I could watch her talk forever', I thought to myself. She was perfect.
She touched my hand as she laughed. I liked it when she did so. She tilted her head slightly to the left when trying to get life anecdotes and small talk from my shy self. I liked this even more.

I'd barely touched my coffee, and she was about a third of the way through her frapucinno when she whispered in my ear, "Follow me".
She took me by the hand, quite gingerly at first, and then clasped it tightly as we stood up and she skipped towards to female toilets, pulling me with her. Looking around to make sure no-one was looking, she pushed me through the door and led me to a cubicle.

As the cubicle door shut behind her I kissed on the back of the neck as she slid the lock to 'occupied'. Susan turned and our lips met. They were so soft, so gentle, and her tongue felt warm and almost rough in comparison as it worked with mine. We stumbled backwards, holding each other for support, the kissing getting more frenzied with every passing moment. I felt her reach for the flies on my work trousers and I repayed the favour, being careful not to rub too hard against her polyester trousers for fear of getting a static shock.

Susan's hands moved from my waist and all the way up my back until she was cupping my neck. Then she slid them outwards across my shoulders, forcing me down onto the toilet as she did so. We both gasped for breath. I remember wiping saliva from the corner of my mouth. As Susan dropped to her knees, my meaty bangstick pulsated and throbbed with all its might, itching to be freed from the cage that was my boxer shorts and into the beautiful wilderness that was Susan's mouth. I lifted my buttocks slightly so that she could pull my trousers and boxers down.

The blow job was heavenly. Susan's tongue teased my shaft as she licked gently from my balls up to the tip, smiling and moaning as she did so. This was a huge turn on, knowing that she was enjoying pleasuring me. She teased me, opening her mouth over my cock, but refusing to close until I was near on begging her to suck me into oblivion. By now my shaft was truly awesome; more hard and manly than ever before, aching with the pain and torment of not being relieved. My balls sat tightly,like two vacuum packed ping pong balls, all the while being gently groped by Susan's ever willing hand. Eventually she took me into her mouth, her eyes looking up at me as she did so. Her eyes looked so innocent, so pure, and I had to remind myself that she was expertly working my cock with both hand and mouth, definitely no amateur, and certainly no angel.

The relief was immense. I saw colours and lights and my hands gripped Susan's shoulders tightly. My salty love stew dribbled from the corner of Susan's mouth and my bellend glistened with post cum.

"Best get back to work" she said and she smiled and left me, sat half naked in the female toilets of Costa.

I continued seeing Susan for about 2 months after this first encounter and it is a part of my life that I will always look back on with great fondness. We even had sex in the bank during early evenings when she had to balance the tills. This soon stopped because I couldn't face cumming whilst looking at a life size cut out of Howard the Halifax Man. She no longer works at the branch, having moved to Devon and having been transferred.
(, Mon 20 Jul 2009, 15:01, 7 replies)
Bloody hell
I thought this was a Spanky post, and was waiting for the punchline!

Worth a click just for the vacuum packed ping pong balls.
(, Mon 20 Jul 2009, 15:15, closed)
For this...
"This soon stopped because I couldn't face cumming whilst looking at a life size cut out of Howard the Halifax Man".

Clickety-click mate!
(, Mon 20 Jul 2009, 15:48, closed)
Internet lies!
They would never let you get away with sex in the bank. They all have security cameras.


But nice bit of internet naughties to read in the afternoon.
(, Mon 20 Jul 2009, 15:58, closed)
Have a *click*
For this image of lustful caution: "being careful not to rub too hard against her polyester trousers for fear of getting a static shock."

And for a good, old-fashioned, jazz mag mucky story.
(, Mon 20 Jul 2009, 16:19, closed)
post an animated gif

(, Mon 20 Jul 2009, 17:21, closed)
Oh my
How very very excellent. Well told!
(, Tue 21 Jul 2009, 0:46, closed)
Gotta love the smut
Click! Nicely told, mate.
(, Tue 21 Jul 2009, 11:14, closed)

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