Bank related woe
Whilst it seems I have been luckier than some of those posting here, I still have an array of banking cockuppery to relate.

- Barclays, who persist in putting a block on my boyfriends' card every time he goes abroad. Even when he's phoned them in advance to let them know he's going out of the country.

- Lloyds (ahh, Lloyds, where do I begin?), who tried to do me a favour. I went to draw some cash out one lunchtime, and was mildly ticked off to find that the machine closest was having none of it. No bother, I figure, and wander a few roads up to the next one. Still no joy. By now, panic is setting in. I know there's money in there... At least, I thought there was. Why isn't my card working? As happens in these cases, your mind starts fearing the worst, and I trundle over to the nearest Lloyds branch to find out what's going on.

By the time I get there, I'm firmly convinced that the police are waiting to pounce as soon as I show my sorry face and that the end of the world is, in fact, coming. Shaking like a leaf, I ask the lady at the counter to find out why my card isn't working.

Turns out they'd decided to upgrade my common or garden cashpoint card (which I liked because it stops you spending anything) to a proper Visa debit one. They'd cancelled my current card, but forgotten to send me the new one. Oh... Or tell me that they were doing it.

- Lloyds again. One of my bank cards was cancelled for fraudulent use, even before I'd actually received it in the post. That has to be something of a record...

- Lloyds have also screwed up my overdraft limit whilst a student. I had an overdraft set up, and when it was due for renewal, they sent me a letter asking to confirm I wanted to keep it. Being a cunning little thing, I both wrote and phoned them, to say that yes please, I'd like to have the overdraft kept as it is.

It's only a week or so into the term when the student loan has yet to arrive, that I get another letter from the bank, saying that I'm about £500 overdrawn, with no overdraft limit. As such, they're charging me a silly amount of money for each day I am over, plus a silly amunt more for every transaction I have made (which they happily let me do), plus an even sillier amount for the sending of this automated letter.

Thankfully the student loan arrived the next day, which got me into the black again, and I was able to get all my charges refunded, thanks to some digging around for letters and record phone conversations.

- Lloyds yet again. I was unlucky enough to get mugged back in February. Some council estate scrotes thought it's be a merry jape to try and steal my handbag. I managed to keep hold of it in the end, but not before one of the more enterpising thugs had made off with my wallet.

This happened about 2 minutes from my door, so I immediately run back hope and phone up the bank to cancel my card. In absolute floods, I manage to have a vaguely coherant conversation with a Lloyds guy and get my card cancelled. As he confirms that he's blocked it, he then decides that now would be an ideal time to ask me if I would like to take out their ID protection plan for only £10 a month? And while I'm at it, would I be interested in...

It was at this point when I started bawling abuse down the phone at him before hanging up in a mixture of distress and apoplexy.

- Last one. Promise. The "local" branch of Lloyds is actually a bit of a trek away, so I tried to do something with my account using this new fangled internet banking. Turns out that takes over a week to set up, so I try phone banking instead. They ask me for my details, which I give. A few security questions, mothers maiden name etc. I give that too. Then they ask me for two letters from my password. Christ, I have a password?! Eventually I think I remember it, so give them that too. Then, to add insult to injury, they ask for a pass number. By now, I have no idea if I'm coming or going, so give up and head to the local branch. Who can't do what I want.

- I lied. Does anyone else find it ridiculous the amount of post they get from their bank? I swear, every other flipping envelope is from them, and they all go straight in the bin...
(Kitimariana, Tue 21 Jul 2009, 16:28, Reply)