My bastard mate
From a good five years back was into the whole body mod thing. He had the comic book character Spawn tattooed onto back, with the cape spanning across both shoulders all the way to the small of his back.
He had piercings everywhere, the bridge of his nose, ears, eyebrows, labretta, tongue, the back of his hands (they didn't last long), nipples, and of course the Prince Albert.
I swear the guy was magnetic.

Anyway, he goes into his local parlor to find a new challenge, a new piercing for his lass to fawn over, and he find these small ball bearings. Upon a bit of research he finds out that these are surgically implanted into the cock to increase pleasure for the lady in your life.
Without hesitation he empties his wallet and some time later he's strolling home to the missus with clear instructions to 'not let the egg get hard boiled' for a week.

He manages to wait roughly 5 hours.

I met him in a pub maybe 3 days after he had it done so he can tell me about his new body mod.
He turns up late, walks straight over to my table and tells me all about it, what the sex was like, all the grisly detail on how much it hurt, etc, etc.
It's then that I asked a rather stupid question.
"So, how is 'it' doing, man?"

"Oh not bad dude, it's been sitting in your pint for the last 15 minutes."

It had fallen out the night before and the cunt had slipped it into my pint.
Bastard.
( Pointy Head poked another hole in my anorak on, Fri 1 Dec 2006, 14:39, Reply)

Hmmm....
Have pierced the skin between my knuckles, nose and ears several times. Pierced my knuckle with a safetey pin and had to screw the bar into the hole as it wasn't quite big enough, all of these have gone septoc and come out. Chickened out of doing my tongue and did that properly.

Had the top ball of a clit hood piercing go inside the skin- required drunken home surgery with a stanley knife to remove that one.

Woke up after playing the Withnail drinking game to find a lot of blood and my nipple ring no longer in my nipple.

So I've had both my nipple and my clit hoot pierced twice- quite a lot of pain.

And i've got a small tatto of a star I did after watching memento "to see if it really works like that." It does.

EDIT: Have just remembered that the morning after I found me new nipple ring out, I attemted to push the ring back into my now slit nipple, and superglue the two halves together. Didn't work.
( Madam Marlboro wonders if you've found her yet, Fri 1 Dec 2006, 14:35, Reply)

frankspencer
i got that response off my aunt when i got my lip done, fair enough if she didnt have her belly button and ears pierced i'd say, but no, apparantly thats conventional, so its okay,and not attention seeking riiiight....
tattoos and facial pisericngs and other such body modifications have a long archaeological history, so clearly anchient cultures as well as modern *subcultures* considered them to have some aesthetic value, as such, how is getting your eyebrow pierced to draw attention to your eyes if you happen to think they're an attractive feature any worse or differrent to getting a haircut to flatter the shape of your face or something like that...
(skankgirl, Fri 1 Dec 2006, 14:32, Reply)

I need Advice on what i'm gonig to post.
I'm into piercing... and have a couple... I needs to know what's acceptable to be posted here... Does a picture of a Flaccid Tadger with the pope's hat hidden by a ladies hand count as NSFW?

DO NOT reply on this page.. MESSAGE ME if you think it'd be unacceptable....

IF I post it, It'll be in the form of an NSFW link... clearly labelled.

I'll delete this, and just go ahead an post if it gets the public go-ahead.

Oh.. and there's a good story to it too :o)
( Humpty Dumpty was Pushed Is unaware of having any limits., Fri 1 Dec 2006, 14:28, Reply)

At last count...
...I'd had my heart pierced seven times by Cupid's arrow.


Healing up nicely now, the scars hardly show (sigh...sniff...)


sigh...
(Che Grimsdale Best before:, Fri 1 Dec 2006, 14:16, Reply)

Whilst at university
I met a lovely South Londoner by the name of Paddy.

One evening after several beverages we got chatting, and Paddy said, "You know, it's such a weird coincidence..."

"What is?" I asked

"I actually have your name tattooed on my arse" he replied, to much disbelief on my part.


Imagine the hilarity as he pulled down his filthy keks to reveal 'Your Name' written in lovely flowing script across his left buttock.


Worst. Chat-up Line. Ever.
( kirst0s, Fri 1 Dec 2006, 13:54, Reply)

you need hands
I did some temp warehousing work with a guy who'd lost a finger in an industrial accident some years previously.

He had tattooed knuckles that said "LOVE" and "HAT".
...
(Barry_Bulsara, Fri 1 Dec 2006, 13:52, Reply)

Man cuts own cock with plyers!

Whilst trying to re close my P.A. after giving it a bit of a scrub to get the limescale off, the ring slipped and I nipped the end of me bell. I jumped about 28 feet into the sky.

There was lots of blood and I felt very faint. So I lay down on the floor for a bit and bled like a girl from me wee bit.

The sad thing is neither the P.A. or the plyers came with any sort of warning about that sort of thing.
(waxdart hello., Fri 1 Dec 2006, 13:51, Reply)

I've been inked.
I have a tattoo on my arse.

It's of a policeman, holding a torch, pointing upwards, towards the 'crack'.

The copper on my arse has a speech bubble. It says.

'Come down Mr Brown, we know you are up there'.

I thought it was funny at the time, I no longer think it's funny, partly because for about 6 months after I had it done, loads of people (including strangers) wanted to see it, therefore, I spent the best part of half a year 'mooning' in various pubs, clubs, bars and airport.

Well, not airports, but you know what I mean.

I'm new here, and I apologise.

Still, it's 'goodbye, new-bi Tuesday' or however it is the song went.

Length and girth are both minimal.

Hello everyone.
( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Fri 1 Dec 2006, 13:50, Reply)

oooh, okay...
yeah, tats down both arms, on my back (the blueprint from godspeed's A#F# infinity album if you're interested...and the burning matchbox kid just underneath that, woo!) up my stomach and on my chest...no real problems, except some bits that scarred up and had to be redone (for free, seeing as the tattooist was a lovely lad). no, I'm not some kind of "look at me, I'm a crazy freak!" person, just like tattoos - very addictive, and good for breaking the ice with girls ;)

not really a piercing person - had my ears, nose and eyebrow done at various times, no problems except eventual boredom and having to get a job.

the funnest one was when me and my (now ex) girlfriend branded ourselves...we were bored on a friday evening and wanted something to do that was free (decided while having a pint in the walkabout, of all places). so, after a bit of dutch courage we got a ring and held it over the hob with a pair of pliers. when it was hot I jammed it into my stomach, just by my hip. I think the most worrying thing was the POP when it hit...hehehe...so, when I took it away I realised it hadn't gone deep enough so had to do it again (luckily it was all numb by this point). my girlfriend made me leave the room while she did hers, then called me back in to re-do it cos, like me, she'd gone shallow. they turned out alright actually, but our original plan of having loads of connected circles went out of the window a bit after we'd each done one...for obvious reasons :)

amusing thing to do if you're bored and don't mind a little pain...both of us eventually got them covered up with tattoos though - her with lovely mexican day of the dead skulls, me with zombie hands bursting up out of my lower-waist area...sort of thing. see, not all tattoos are celtic bands and nondescript tribal. not sure what the point of this story is...anyone else tried home branding? how much success did you have?

apologies for the usual...and suchlike.
( yes yes yes man oi mate, someone's writtten 'bum' on your neck, Fri 1 Dec 2006, 13:48, Reply)

Scars
I love all sorts of body modifications and most of mine have worked out well, except one brand I gave myself.
I was drunk and temporarily forgot that burns tend to spread out a bit as they heal, so something that looked a bit like this at the time....

...now looks like this, four years later

(deadly, Fri 1 Dec 2006, 13:46, Reply)

The closest thing I've ever had to a piercing
was a squirrel, who attached himself via his little pointy teeth to my left hand for about thirty seconds in 1997, after my dog had attacked it.
The vicious little bastard bit literally right through the fleshy bit between my thumb and forefinger. I still have the scars.
( krang, Fri 1 Dec 2006, 13:43, Reply)

worried now
the closest i've ever come to this is one modest piercing in each ear. although i did once stand on a bra hook which put an unbelievable hole in my foot.

and i worked with a total freak who had "GOD" tattooed on his back and "floccio non facio" (latin for "i don't give a hang") around his bellybutton.

but i am very worried about sanebutoverwhelmed's description about the tug ear flap being level with the eyes - mine aren't! the top of my ears are level with my eyes. am i really really out of proportion?!? help!! (but probably via gaz so rob doesn't kill me)
( rachelswipe with a fork, Fri 1 Dec 2006, 13:33, Reply)

Sorry Dave...
Never change your friend's freshly pierced eyebrow ring for them after you've been eating salt and vinegar crisps.

They'll cry like a stuck pig for the next hour.

Fact.
(Rakky (forgot her password) The muffin maverick, Fri 1 Dec 2006, 13:23, Reply)

Tattoos
I have tattoos on most of both upper arms, and within the next couple of years will be fully sleeved. It always hurts, but what pisses me off is no matter how I look after them I always get dropouts, which have to be reworked. Piercings don't do anything for me either way. Weak theory Frankspencer: I'm secure enough in myself- I don't need to make a public show, I just enjoy having decorated skin.
( uncle bastard is twanging a dan moi, Fri 1 Dec 2006, 13:11, Reply)

Pierced my ear lobe in a chemistry class...
using a safety pin that had been flamed with a lighter, it hurt. I really have no need for tattoo's because i've got lots of interesting scars from various accidents, operations and dog bites. However, I've always wanted a series of tattoos of various symbols, and numbers over my shoulder and down my arm. Little fact : Edward VII who reigned 1901-1910, son of Prince Albert, had a large number of tattoos from various places including Japan and New Zealand whilst serving in the british navy! I wonder if Prince Harry has any dodgy tatts ?!
( 42 Loves Teh Funphenschnaffles, Fri 1 Dec 2006, 13:00, Reply)

At The Risk
Of offending a load of people....

I have to say that I hate tattoo's and body-mods. It makes the wearers look like chavs.

Still, as I'm a bit of a hypocrite at times, I must admit to copping off with numerous ladies who sported tattoos when I was younger.

Why? I can hear you ask. Because, in my experience, women with tattoos were generally easier.

Let the flames begin.

Cheers
( Legless Mister Stabby - shanks for the memory, Fri 1 Dec 2006, 12:54, Reply)

Frankspencer

That's right. They're a way of saying "I don't really know what ancient Celtic artwork looks like."
(apeloverage committed the vile act of onanism on, Fri 1 Dec 2006, 12:49, Reply)

frankspencer
I've had my nipple ring for 20 years. And I am special. In a yellow bus special kind of way...
( enoughblueskyforsailorstrousers, Fri 1 Dec 2006, 12:46, Reply)

Frankspencer
no, there not.
(Neostenine's maker, Fri 1 Dec 2006, 12:25, Reply)

Eyebrow
Had a ring put in the eyebrow when I was at college. A few months later it was almost completely ripped out when I was crowd surfing at a Machine Head gig. It stayed in by a tiny little thread of skin so I took it out with a pair of pliers. Still have the scar today but no longer any piercings.
(Phelpsy Bollocks trapped behind radiator since, Fri 1 Dec 2006, 12:22, Reply)

At the risk of earning terrible wrath ...
Aren't tattoos and piercings just a rather mundane way saying, "Look at me! I'm crazy! I'm special!"
(frankspencer, Fri 1 Dec 2006, 12:14, Reply)

A lefty activist I knew
had "WAR" on the knuckles of his right hand, "PEACE" on the knuckles of his left hand...and "THE BROTHERS KARAMAZOV" down his spine.





Thanks A.Sayle
(Che Grimsdale Best before:, Fri 1 Dec 2006, 12:09, Reply)

Pierced ears
I've pierced my own ears six times, mostly when drunk, cos it doesn't hurt.

The only one I ever regretted was doing my tragus (the little flap of ear in line with your eyes at the front of your ear, which half-covers the your lug 'ole). I was a bit pissed and, using a silver stud flamed for a few seconds with a clipper for amateur-sterilisation purposes, pushed it through the skin. No problem. I then spent fifteen minutes wiping blood off my fingers while trying to put the butterfly clasp on the inside of my ear.

I was quite pleased with it, although it did start to go a bit manky, so I did the usual bathe-it-in-surgical-spirit thing. Three weeks later, although it was no longer septic, it decided to work its way out of my tragus, apparently changing the structure of my ear in the process. It literally dissolved its way out of my head. I had half a hole in my ear for a few weeks, then it closed up and all I have left is a tiny scar.

Bastard!
( Noeli overtheshoulderboulderholderthingstraplatchboobs, Fri 1 Dec 2006, 12:06, Reply)

My final answer for this week...
I had my labret pierced 3 weeks ago (under my lip).

I spent a while chatting to the guy doing the piercing, talking about possible tooth and gum damage etc, then decided to go for it, and said "Is it going hurt?"

"No" he replied "I won't feel a thing"

Good answer!
(Professor Kenny Martin Hmm? What?, Fri 1 Dec 2006, 12:04, Reply)

Actually, semi-interesting.
I've managed to get my nipple pierced three times.

Yes, three.

First, when I was about 19, in Colchester, and I took it out about a year later coz it wasn't really healing properly.

Again a couple of years ago, in celebration of the fact that I could, because I was no longer with my girlfriend, who hated the idea. This one was rejected by my body, and worked its way forward, growing out through my nipple in a matter of weeks - when it finally came out I was left with a nipple split into 2 halves - it's healed now, but with a line across it.

Third time, earlier this year - the guy who did it reckoned the one that grew out had been done too far forward, and pierced behind it - this one's still in, and so far shows no signs of moving.
(Professor Kenny Martin Hmm? What?, Fri 1 Dec 2006, 12:02, Reply)

Not me but my girlfriend...
Tried to pierce her own lip with a drawing pin when she was drunk. It didn't work and now she's got a small, slightly off centre scar underneath her bottom lip.

I can't ever imagine her doing that now as she shit her pants when she went to get her belly button pierced and left the shop just before she was about to get it done.
(Peter Sutcliffe's Right Bollock, Fri 1 Dec 2006, 12:01, Reply)

Nothing really interesting...
I've got a few tats (just on my arms at the moment), and a couple of piercings.

I've just had a couple of moles removed from the back of my neck though, and a small lump removed from my back (nothing serious, just a cyst), all so that I can get tattoos there.

The moles were fine, they just numb them, slice them off and burn them to stop the bleeding: the scabs heal in a few days.

The lump though, appears to have been dug out of my back with a sharpened spoon, and I now have an ugly looking mess with 3 stitches in which need to be removed next week. I'm sure that's going to leave a permanent modification.
(Professor Kenny Martin Hmm? What?, Fri 1 Dec 2006, 11:58, Reply)

...


NSFW!

.
( 100% Cock Raw like carrots., Fri 1 Dec 2006, 11:57, Reply)

My only tattoo
"May contain nuts" on scrotum
(Che Grimsdale Best before:, Fri 1 Dec 2006, 11:54, Reply)