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This is a question Breakin' The Law

'I'd taken some mushrooms in a pub,' writes Allen Smithee, 'and things had got a bit odd. People turning into goblins, barstools into toadstools etc. I wandered off from my friends and found myself in a carpark. I noticed a huge liquorice allsort driving towards me and Bertie Basset got out. I kinda realised that Bertie was a policeman and my brain went into paranoid fast forward. I decided that I must be being arrested and said, "I'll just get in the back of your car, Officer" Bertie looked at me with disgust, "Not bleeding likely sunshine. Just piss off home ok?"'

(, Wed 7 Jan 2004, 20:34)
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I fought the law... and I won
I was cycling home from a friends house pissed. On the pavement. With no lights.

Stopped by a copper, who tells me off for 'drunk in charge', 'riding on pavement' and 'no lights'. It's a fair cop...

Instead of arresting me, he lets the air out of my tyres, tells me to walk home, gets in his car smiling, and drives off again.

Luckily, I'd only just left my mate's house, so I walked back 100 yards, rang doorbell, borrowed a pump, and within minutes was breaking the law again...
(, Thu 8 Jan 2004, 21:56, closed)

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