roommates
i like travelling on my own, but sometimes, it's just too expensive and i need someone to share a room with me. this can be fun, but it can also be a complete fucking pain in the arse.

boyfriend:
2 weeks doing nothing but get wasted. fun, but repetitive.

best friend:
brilliant, until she got her foot done in by some wanker stamping on it and got carted back from the medical centre* at 3a.m, morphined up and effectively stopping what me and the rather nice bloke i'd met were about to do.

mad auntie #1:
complained for a fortnight that spain was "just like blackpool but with foreigners" and needing me to show her how to phone england every fucking day because she was too dense to grasp the concept.

mad auntie #2:
refused to wash herself with anything other than baby wipes, wanted to go to bed at 7.30 and expected me to say prayers with her. i solved that one by getting her completely shitfaced on cheap bacardi, after which she loosened right the fuck up.

and finally, debbie.
went to the pub the first night, spent the rest of a 2-week holiday in bed, reading magazines and drinking lager. didn't shower once, took one pair of knickers for the entire fortnight and utterly stank the fucking room out. my then-ex was on holiday with us, so fortunately, i could spend a lot of time in his room(no, not like that), away from the stink.

always choose your roommates wisely.

*she got jumped when i wasn't there, otherwise of course i'd have been at the medical centre with her.
( Smash Monkey lowering the tone of the whole internet, Sat 26 Apr 2014, 15:39, 4 replies)

Some people never learn from their mistakes
yet feel qualified to give advice.
(the other guy not the one that gave you coochie warts, Sun 27 Apr 2014, 1:56, closed)

oh, i learn
and what i learn is it's a lot easier to put up with bad roommates when you're saving over £200
( Smash Monkey lowering the tone of the whole internet, Sun 27 Apr 2014, 14:27, closed)

You can justify it any way you want.

(the other guy not the one that gave you coochie warts, Mon 28 Apr 2014, 0:15, closed)

emm
dang.
(drunksteve is not drunk, Mon 28 Apr 2014, 23:07, closed)