Always lock your computer!
Aside from the usual giggling at farts, gliding round on trollies, or slowing down in front of cuntish tailgaters as mentioned earlier, I find myself getting up to a lot of things which in retrospect lead me to question whether or not I should actually be trusted out in the big wide world. Frankly, I'm the least mature person I know. Not that I consider it a bad thing, but sometimes, I do worry.

I work in an office, with a lot of like-minded people. That is, people who are just as immature as I am. All happily getting drunk on school nights, re-arranging keyboards and hiding each other's hot lunch in the cupboards. It's not a lunchbreak if you don't end up playing hunt-the-butty.

As part of working in an office, we all have computers. And we all have childish senses of humour. And we all make sure we lock our workstations as a result, lest a fruity email be sent out, with our signature attached to it. Most of the time, it's pretty tame stuff such as "I want your collective lengths up my Hershey Highway" kind of stuff. However, one day, the office joker (we all have one) left his computer unlocked whilst on a lunchbreak. How foolish of him.

Here is the email that was sent:

"As I'm sure you're all aware, I'm having a party this weekend. However, the theme of the party has changed. It will no longer be a barbeque with BYO booze. Instead, the first person to arrive will need to untie me, as I will be alone, in my room, naked and covered in taramasalata, handcuffed to the bed.

PS. Bring your own sheep".

It took him a little while to live that one down, poor bastard. Until he got into my computer and sent round an email offering to piss into peoples winking browneyes for a nominal fee.

Git.
( jim_bob can herd cats., Tue 22 Sep 2009, 11:16, Reply)