unwanted attention
several years ago, i was spending the night in my parent's house due to mine being flooded.
about 1.30 a.m, everyone else was in bed and i was sitting alone in the living room, watching dracula with the lights off.
after a while, i began to get the feeling that someone was watching me. now, as i've already said, i'm a paranoid bugger, so i put it down to that.
an hour later, the feeling hadn't gone away. i decided to look out of the window, just to check.
in the light of the streetlamp, i could just about see that the garden was empty. i was about to sit back down, when a movement caught my eye. i looked sideways and there, leaning against the wall of the house, was a bloke of roughly 24, pants round his ankles and cock in hand, obviously hitting the vinegar strokes.
at this point, i didn't know whether to be freaked out or laugh, so i phoned the police.
he must have realised what i was doing, as he finished up quickly and waddled off down the path, still largely untrousered. the police arrived soon after, but they never caught him.

length? quite impressive, actually.
( Smash Monkey lowering the tone of the whole internet, Thu 23 Jul 2009, 23:13, Reply)