Confession
.
I make up incredible stories about my life and post them on B3ta as true.

To add authenticity I've created a series of sock-puppets who claim to have met me in real life (Tourettes, Mrs Legless, I'Anglepoise, Davros etc) - people who've actually been present at some of my stories - and use them to bolster my claims.

In reality I'm an accountant who's never been outside of Reading.

Cheers
( Legless Mister Stabby - shanks for the memory, Thu 15 Jan 2009, 13:57, 6 replies)

It's true!
I was there.

In Reading.

Being an accountant, too.

As well.
( reallywittyname veraciously conspues lexiphanicism on, Thu 15 Jan 2009, 13:59, closed)

Goddam, you've got skills!
I mean, making sock puppets who can meet me in pubs in England to have belming contests and drink pints with me is one hell of a rare talent! Especially having them engaged to be married? How the hell did you pull that off?!?

I'm impressed!
( The Resident Loon Not a demographic. Do not measure., Thu 15 Jan 2009, 14:07, closed)

I'm
an accountant. A bean counter.

I simply redirected the cash to upgrade the servers to the London School Of Acting and made them memorize certain posts and sent them off to the Bashes.

I was there too.

I was the fat,balding, blonde bloke next to the toilets frantically tesxting people.

Cheers
( Legless Mister Stabby - shanks for the memory, Thu 15 Jan 2009, 14:18, closed)

This is very true
I am a figment of someone else's fertile imagination.

The lie is so convincing that I sometimes have to pinch myself in order to stop being deluded.

It's a bit like 'The Matrix', except I have a much cooler imaginary coat than Keanu ever did.
( Davros' Granddad a voice of calm reason in a world of spastics., Thu 15 Jan 2009, 14:29, closed)

I quite liked Neo's coat...
...it had quite practical pockets as well
( notmyrealname, Tue 20 Jan 2009, 19:11, closed)

You're not an accountant.
Just an overly imaginative office junior.
( disasterprone "Pyjamas caused the Holocaust", Tue 20 Jan 2009, 12:00, closed)