Doggy style ...
Last summer my fiance and I had a spate of devouring those conical Fruit Pastille ice lollies. Just the thing on a hot day.

On such a hot day, I was at his place fiddling with his tv, retuning it or some such, I can't recall. I was kneeling down on the floor in front of the goggle box as one is wont to do, and wearing hipster jeans at the time, my peachy bum crevice was on display and would have done a builder proud.

Himself creeps up behind me and sticks his Fruit Pastille lolly down my crevice, causing me to leap into the air and drop the tv remote, squealing at the frozen invader, which he of course thought was hilarious.
"Right, you can lick that off now," says I, and he laughed and gave the sticky cold area a few licks. Then he wandered off, and I got back to fettling the tv, wincing at the fruity liquid running down my arse.
A couple of minutes later I feel licking in this most intimate area yet again, and very nice it was too. But without turning I say, "Look you, I'm never going to finish this if you keep doing that."
He replies, from oddly far away, "What ? I'm not doing anything !"
I look around to challenge this and find to my horror that it is not him who is nuzzling my crevice and enjoying the sweat and sticky ice lolly therein, it is his guide dog, Otto the Labradoodle.

I have never been able to live this down, and my fiance has told all our friends about it.

As the dog is in effect a "minor" in our care courtesy of Guide Dogs for the Blind, I couldn't work out whether he had violated me or I had violated him. :)
(womanwhocanonlylivewithdogs, Thu 6 Aug 2009, 17:40, 1 reply)

He's blind
But he managed to be accurate enough to stick a lolly between arse and waistband?

I call shenanigans.
(DarkLite swallowed my entire undercarriage, Mon 10 Aug 2009, 3:41, closed)