My manager - many years ago
After uni, I did a couple of jobs and ended up at the Global IT company that I'm at now. It's ok - I mean, I left and then went back so it can't be all bad.... (!)

When I started, I worked in hell, sorry Hull - My manager, let's call him Michael, for t'was his name - was, to be frank, a dooshbag - of the highest quality. I know dooshbag is a horrendous americanism, but it describes him perfectly.

My first week was where it went wrong - upon being asked where I want to be in 6 months, I said "in your job". This did not go down well.

The next 2 years were spent trying, desperately, to progress beyond the menial grade I was on to something a bit better, but I was undermined at every turn, reviews were harsh and negative.

He wouldn't hesitate to put me down in front of the customer and make damned sure everyone knew he was the boss and I was a lackey. I, somehow, never rose to this.

As a result of this, we fought (in the private office we had) tooth and nail. And, now I look back, it meant the I developed what could only be described as a fuck off great chip on my shoulder.

Over the couple of years, I grew to hate him - I saw my career (such as it was) stalled and I was desperate to get away from him, but at every turn, he would undermine me and scuppered any attempt at an internal transfer.

The only upside to this was Nicki who I worked with (who is still a good friend of mine 13 years later) who ended up being the referee between us and managed to calm me down when all I wanted to do was smash the little fuckers face in. Without her, I suspect that I would have thrown him off the roof.

Michael Wood - my nemesis - Since you left after 2 and a half tortueous years, I have progressed so spectacularly to be a well respected and highly skilled consultant - I hope that your career floundered and that you and your wife "Maris"* ended up in some council estate in the depths of Rotherham**.



* Maris wasn't her real name, but I called her that once and the name stuck as noone actually, ever, met her
** Ok, maybe not Rotherham as I wouldn't wish that on anyone....
(james_tiger_woods is going to start his killing spree on the, Wed 5 May 2010, 13:19, 5 replies)

It's 'douchebag'.
From the French 'douche' (shower)
( Bob Todd whee, Wed 5 May 2010, 13:26, closed)

Also
aren't douche-bags used by Porn stars to clean their ass-holes prior to filming?

I might be wrong though because I've never once watched porn. Nope not at all, no siree.

Edit- also I think you made a mistake in saying it was his job you wanted. I would react the same - by trying to ruin your life.
( whenanimalsattackhumans clad in global hypercolour, Wed 5 May 2010, 13:37, closed)

I agree...
I know that I shouldn't have said "I want your job", but I was a jumped up 22 year old who "knew everything".

I've been a manager and I've had that said to me - but in my (very large IT) company, there are ways and means of helping somone achieve their potential - the response should have been something like "well, let's see what we can do to help you develop and find a managerial position within the company"

Turns out I hate being a manager anyway.
(james_tiger_woods is going to start his killing spree on the, Wed 5 May 2010, 13:54, closed)

I'll be honest
I'm probably the calmest most laid back person I know, and not a chance in hell would I have responded with talking about finding you a managerial position, if you said that. He probably didn't obstruct your career, just didn't help
( Amberl was stripey and dominated Europe, Wed 5 May 2010, 17:06, closed)

I dunno; I thought they were just for flushing out minges.

( Bob Todd whee, Wed 5 May 2010, 15:44, closed)