My mother and the dog
This story in question does not take place inside a pub, but just outside one, and as it's one of my mum's favourite "before you were born" stories to regale me with, I thought I'd let all of you lovely people enjoy it too :P

~~~~~~~~~~~~Wavy lines~~~~~~~~~~~~~

May I take you back to the summer of somewhere around 1981, where my mum and dad are out in their Nissan Sunny or whatever they owned back then (come on, I don't listen THAT closely!). My mum is driving but hasn't yet passed her driving test, so my dad is helpfully in the passenger seat being all supportive and coaching her (read, jumping at every available opportunity and waving his hands around instead of giving directions).

This is not a particularly unusual occurence, nor is it an unusual day. My dad instructs my mother to drive through a quiet village near where they live, which happens to contain a very nice quiet country pub. However on this day of all days, as my mum is about to drive past the pub a dog saunters out of the pub. This dog happens to look like it's had a few too many like the regulars sat outside - all of its legs were going in different directions and it had a distinctly glazed look.

This rather inebriated looking beast managed to co-ordinate all of its legs and somehow wander out into the road in front of my mum, who stopped to wait for it to move so she could continue driving. However this was not to be. This tipsy hound sat down in the middle of the road and stared at her. (At this point I should mention it's a narrow raod, so she couldn't just drive around it). "Honk the horn!" instructed my ever helpful father, and my mum obliged. However the mullered mutt continued to stare at the car and refuse to move. My mum decided to honk the horn again, by which time all of the regulars are staring. It is at this point the dog decides to saunter up to the car and place its head firmly on the bonnet and stare through the windscreen at my mum while my dad and all the regulars piss themselves.

Length? Every time she leaves the house she manages to attract all the weirdos in cars to her, so currently, 28 years :p
(Petite chien is going to do science to it, Thu 12 Feb 2009, 11:02, 3 replies)

Thats a nice little read, that is
Seems that every country pub has a pissed dog. Makes me feel all nostalgic for trees and shit like that.
( SpankyHanky, Thu 12 Feb 2009, 11:06, closed)

Animals that rule the road.
My sister used to live in a narrow terraced street. With cars parked both sides, and only space for one car at a time. In the summer her cat would lay in the road sunning himself. Picture the scene.....

Car aproaches, stops, beeps horn.

Cat looks up then lays head back down.

I'm sure he was thinking

"I was here first"
(Pill Popper Thank you Sasha Shulgin, Thu 12 Feb 2009, 11:31, closed)

Maybe it thought
they were 'Dogging'
....


*gets coat*
(sailorspoon started wiping his own arse from, Thu 12 Feb 2009, 12:23, closed)