There's something about... Clare
A few years ago, I somehow ended up involved with an older woman called Clare. After "going out" with her for a few months, I agreed to move in with her.

It was this point that I discovered that she was actually a controlling psycho bitch who was determined to make my life a misery.

After a couple of months of being belittled, abused and occasionally beaten (and not in a fun, spanky way either) I decided to move out.

Now, one of the things she had screamed at me for a few hours about was she once caught me using her expensive, £20 a bottle shampoo, instead of the Tesco Value stuff she'd bought for me. So, as I was moving my stuff out, I locked myself in the bathroom for a few minutes and cracked one out into her shampoo.

The bottle was nearly full at this point, so she must have spent months washing her hair in my baby-batter.
(ScousersPet, Tue 21 Feb 2012, 9:45, 3 replies)

The words 'fun' and 'spanky' have no business being in the same sentence as each other.

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Tue 21 Feb 2012, 9:49, closed)

It probably helped give her shiny hair.

( mark morrisons prison shoes I love Willie, Tue 21 Feb 2012, 10:46, closed)

shiny spunky
( janet aylia y'all motherfuckers need jesus, Tue 21 Feb 2012, 12:00, closed)