I don't tend to actually see the misfortune of others
... in a "You've Been Maimed, sorry Framed" sort of way because regular QOTW readers for the last few months might recall that I am virtually blind. As a result I tend to take a pratfall more than your average bear so I don't tend to find other people hurting themselves funny. I can relate, innit.

However the funniest of my own misfortunes were when I was fully sighted. It seems abit bad form to laugh at a blind woman so people rush to help rather than laugh at me these days, although my fiance (totally blind) and I often piss ourselves at each other falling over the dog or out of bed or whatever.

Wavy lines...

When I were a schoolgirl of fourteen or so, the in thing to do was to chuck your mate's bag somewhere inaccessible or awkward. We went to a school which had a five foot chainlink fence running along the front of the playground, which bordered a very busy main road. (Blyth Jex in Norwich, for any of you Norfukkers out there.)
One lunch time, we were hanging about down by the front fence as usual, and one of the lads in our group decided to chuck my friends bag over the fence onto the path by the road. She was not pleased. They thought it was the funniest thing ever. To retrieve it we would have had to walk up the field to the gate, then walk around two sides of the playground. I wasn't in for that - and neither was she - so I asked my mate to give me a leg up, and over the fence I lithely popped in a gymnastic move I wouldn't have believed possible of me unless I'd done it. There was another boy in the group that I had been trying to seduce (in a schoolgirl way) and I wanted to make an impression and show him what a loyal, helpful friend I was.
Bag retrieved. Male element of the group's laughter stilled. Round of applause from the builders in a house opposite who were sitting outside having their lunch. Best friend thinks I'm the mutt's nuts.
Problem is, I still have to get back over the fence. This is where it all went wrong.

Not having someone to give me a leg up on the other side, I have to sort of climb up the chainlink. I get to the top, attempt to spring over and promptly get caught on it. I descend hurriedly and ungracefully down the other side, but my skirt is attaching me to the top of the fence. Cue the skirt sliding up to cover my upper body and face as I come down, to reveal my knickers to all and sundry. As a result of trying to impress the lad mentioned earlier, I was wearing hold ups too.
The builders in the house opposite choke on their chips and piss themselves laughing. The boys in our group are agog, then they collapse into laughter. My friend promptly tries to rip me free whilst another friend jumps in front of me and tries to shield me from the rest of the school with her coat. However my scantied arse is still on display to everyone driving past on the main road at lunchtime. Hoots and catcalls abound. Underneath my skirt I am as red as a barn door.

Then, my friends who are trying to help me start laughing, which means they are too incapacitated to be useful. Eventually I manage to get free after struggling like a landed fish, and the builders give me a round of applause. I even manage to give them a little curtsey with my torn skirt, and laugh it off.

The fact that potentially the whole school saw my knickers took a while to live down. But I pulled the lad I was trying to impress with the hold ups. Obviously he liked what he saw. ;)
(womanwhocanonlylivewithdogs, Fri 18 Dec 2009, 11:21, 3 replies)

Blyth Jex
I used to live near there.

I think it's now called Sewell Park College!
(porkinator is a Rock n Roll nerd!, Fri 18 Dec 2009, 11:30, closed)

The curtsey gives it WIN.
Have a click.
(Juan Quar is clinging to her front teeth on, Fri 18 Dec 2009, 12:15, closed)

Clicks
by the way ... have you heard this lot, www.insightradio.co.uk ?
( Cheeses of Nazareth Where's Captain Kirk? www.whereiskirk.com, Sat 19 Dec 2009, 18:23, closed)