Grade 9 track meet
I've always been a skinny guy, the kind who'd get picked last for every team game. In junior high, every year for phys ed we did a unit on English football and a unit on Canadian football. Whichever team ended up with me was always shocked to find I was the best fullback in the grade. In the Canadian football, I was the fastest runner and made it a habit of scoring a few touchdowns off interceptions per game. Still I hated sports just because I'm the nerd and I'm supposed to be bad at sports. You couldn't be good at both physical and mental activities; it just wouldn't be had.

At the very end of our final year, we had a mandatory track meet, and were told "You must compete in three events or you will fail phys ed." So rather than skip it, I showed up and put myself down for a couple events.

1) The 100-meter run. I didn't even take off my poncho, which was the fashion at the time. We lined up, the starting gun went off, and I blew past everyone. I heard the one black guy in my class shout "Holy crap!" as everyone had figured he'd be the easy winner (being black of course). One event down, one first-place ribbon, and one stereotype broken.

2) The long jump. We got two jumps. I did my first one and it was just about average. I was disappointed, but everyone said, "No, no, that was a good jump." I did a second one and got around four meters, which was good for a 14-year-old. Everyone was silent, staring at where I'd landed, way farther than everyone else. So that's two first place ribbons.

3) Near the end of the day, I realised that despite my two victories, I still needed to do one event or I'd fail. The only event left was the triple jump, which I totally bombed.

Pretty soon after, everyone forgot I was more athletic than them, including me. Twelve years on I've really let myself go. Last night I woke up on the couch with a half-finished beer in my hand, and I could hardly bend at the waist.
(racetraitor has an alibi for, Fri 31 Mar 2006, 4:01, Reply)